"Who is this you've brought home?"
As soon as he stepped into the house, a booming, elderly voice filled with worry hit his ears. His troubled eyes lifted toward Ara. She looked perfectly satisfied and calm.
"Grandmother! This is Mr. Kang's son. At least let him sit inside. He's been soaking in the rain for a very long time," she said in calm voice. Along with that, she led him toward the bathroom so he could freshen up.
The grandmother's suspicious gaze made Iseul feel prickly and restless. He stopped right at the bathroom door.
"He was trying to open his own door. Why would a thief use the front entrance??" Patting Iseul's shoulder to signal him to be at ease and go inside, she stood before her grandmother with her hands on her hips. "And thieves or dacoits don't just sit there stubbornly when a house lock won't open!"
"Times have changed. Maybe the traditions of thieves have changed too." The grandmother was somewhat convinced, but winning the argument was more important.
"The traditions of thieves??" Repeating the word 'traditions', she burst out laughing. During this, Iseul also came out after freshening up. He had taken his shoes off outside already. He had also removed his wet hoodie and the jacket. In his white plain shirt and blue jeans, he looked quite refreshed. Despite his face being thin and worn out, its natural glow remained exactly as it was.
"Mr. Kang isn't this handsome. You've probably taken after your mother." The grandmother offered this commentary after carefully observing his appearance. Ara just looked at her speechlessly, while Iseul gave a very slight smile. This happy bright atmosphere was completely strange to him.
"What is happening here? Why are you guys tangling with each other this late at night? Is the whole day not enough for you two ladies?" A heavy male voice rose first the owner of the voice appeared afterward. This man, around Mr. Kang's age, had surely just woken up from a deep sleep. There was irritation in his voice, but no bitterness. Not the kind of bitterness that usually made Iseul's heart stop.
"Ask your princess. She has gone mad with her hobby of doing good deeds. Who knows what street thug she's brought home, making him out to be Mr. Kang's son? Why would he change the password and not give it to his own son??" The upset grandmother presented the "headlines" in a complaining tone, while Ara informed him about the remaining details.
Mr. Park listened to his mother and daughter one by one, then looked at Iseul, who stood there as if a lamb had been trapped in a circle of wolves.
"Yes, I have seen him quite a few times. This is indeed Mr. Kang's son. You can be at peace, Mother. And you, Ara! You shouldn't have gone out in such heavy rain so late at night. You should have woken me up. I would have checked. Helping others is a good habit, but the first priority should be one's own self! And you, Iseul, son. Come with me. I'll give you some of my clothes. You'll fall sick in these garments."
So, it meant every member of this household was in the habit of completing their talk in a single breath! Just like Ara and the grandmother, the way Mr. Park addressed all three of them in one breath led Iseul to reach this conclusion.
Bowing his head like a frightened cat, he followed Mr. Park toward the lounge, deeply feeling the cleanliness and peace reflecting from the walls and doors.
*********
"Don't mind Grandmother's words. At her age, it's a requirement to be suspicious and ask many questions like a child. Otherwise, there was a time when those who knew her used to call her Mother Teresa ! Due to her innocence and sympathy, she even had to face some losses, but those losses weren't so big that they would stop Grandmother from sympathizing with others. I caught this habit from her." While serving him coffee, Ara looked with a smile at her grandmother, who was dozing on a sofa in the lounge.
Iseul nodded and forced a smile. At this moment, only Mr. Kang was weighing on his mind. He was sitting near a window in the lounge. His eyes were constantly fixed toward his own house.
"Why do you look so worried? You're so scared, as if Mr. Kang is going to eat you." That girl really had a deep gaze. Noticing his lack of interest, she began to ask while following the direction of his eyes.
"N..no, it's actually... my Papa is also very sensitive regarding me. If he doesn't find me outside, he will get worried." Fearing his lie would be caught, he immediately began to give an explanation. Then, before Ara could say anything, he started dialing Mr. Kang's number again. Ara felt intensely that he did not want to talk to her.
"Oh, sorry. Maybe I'm disturbing you while you're already worried. Actually, I've left all my friends behind. I haven't met anyone my age here yet, so seeing you made me a bit over emotional."
Iseul raised his head and saw her embarrassed smile. His heart wanted to stay silent. To let the matter end right there. Neither should he speak, nor should that girl. But it was that girl's favor that instead of soaking in the cold rain and shivering with the fear of Sia, he was sitting on a warm, soft sofa drinking coffee. So, it was necessary to smile.
"I don't have any friends either. I don't go anywhere. Home, academy, school, and that's it... maybe that's why I'm behaving strangely." He had to keep giving explanations. Not just for himself, but for the false image built by his father.
"Wait? Is that for real? You have no friends? But why??" She tucked a cushion into her lap and asked with surprise. Her energy had returned at Iseul's explanation.
"Some people are just destined to have no friends."
"I feel a person should be powerful enough that they can change such decisions of destiny."
"How can anyone change the decisions of destiny?" Finally, Iseul showed interest.
"By doing the opposite of destiny! Now look, if life is making us cry, we should laugh. If destiny is troubling us, we should manifest ourselves in a state of joy by finding happiness in small things. People are attracted toward laughing and playing people. When they get close to you and become friends, there's no harm in sharing joys and sorrows with them...! Think of it this way.. You are a sorrowful novel. People run away from sad stories because their own sorrows have also troubled them. So now you have to attract readers with your 'cover'... present a cover so attractive that everyone stops to try and know you at least once... and this way, we often find a sincere reader that is, a friend who keeps us close to their heart!! So, thinking of it as the writing of destiny and leaving oneself at the mercy of circumstances is wrong! One should keep fighting. Destiny should be told that you are more powerful than it. You won't be left alone... you won't stay sad. One should keep fighting...!!"
The silence that spread through the lounge was meaningful. There was the fragrance of coffee, the noise of the rain, and the tick tick of the clock. Iseul looked at her with his breath held. That girl, Park Ara... the one who patted his shoulder carelessly... argued with her grandmother... the girl who completed her talk in one breath and the girl sitting before him right now were two different personalities. So, what was there before was the "cover," and the girl sitting in front was the "novel"! But Kang Iseul hadn't been attracted toward that glittering cover. He had been attracted toward the book. That book didn't look sad, but its words were the kind that sank into the heart.
"I have no sorrows. So I don't even have the need to take the support of a fake cover! Some people prefer to stay within themselves. Not every silence is an expression of sorrow."
Licking his dry lips, he said what he said... he could not, in any way, distort the face of Mr Kang's "happy family."
"People our age like roaming around and partying, and I have no interest in all that. My friends are missing just for that reason. A sad book can still be held to the chest, but not a boring book!" He suddenly made his style lighthearted. Ara looked at him closely with a slow blink, but at that moment, there was only peace on his handsome face.
"Looks like Mr. Kang has arrived." She spoke up suddenly upon seeing a car stop in front of Mr. Kang's house. Iseul bounced off the sofa like a spring. Ara stood up along with him.
"I'll come with you," At Ara's offer, he paused while putting on his joggers.
"No.... no... you have already helped me a lot, for which I am grateful to you. And as Mr Park said helping others is a good thing, but you should put yourself first! The coffee was very good. If I said anything bad, I apologize. Goodbye." Picking up his old clothes and umbrella, he could feel Mr Kang's gaze even from a distance. He wanted to run away immediately, but fulfilling the formality was also necessary.
Ara did not close the door even after he left... she remained standing there until Iseul and Mr. Kang went inside....
*******
"Was that Mr Park's daughter?"
"Yes.... " Frightened and shrinking, he was mentally prepared to hear some roar.
"Is she your friend?" He placed the car keys and broken phone on the table in a throwing manner.
"No....." His tone was one of giving a clarification.
"Why?? Only that dirty, ill mannered, vagabond girl suits you!?" He was either asking or telling, hard to tell. He remained silent. The mention of Sia was making him restless.
"Ara is her name, right? She's your age. And she has taken admission in your school. Try to make friends with her. I want your high school report to be excellent. Whether that report belongs to education or your other activities!" There was the same terror in his voice that stopped Iseul's heartbeat. Despite that, there was a noticeable "leeway" in his manner that startled him.
He was wearing Mr. Park's clothes, but Mr. Kang hadn't done any questioning about that either. Now he was even giving him advice to make friends.... he remained standing in his place, quite surprised.
Lying in bed that night, thinking about his words, another revelation also came to him: Mr. Kang had never actually stopped him from making friends!! He himself didn't know the art of making friends. He was such a coward that if someone ever extended a hand of friendship toward him, he would shrug it off thinking Mr Kang wouldn't like it. That he wouldn't give permission to roam with friends... that he wouldn't let friends be called home... so were all these just his own suspicions??
Had he wasted so many years of his life because of his suspicions?? Out of regret, he held his head.
He was never going to talk to Sia again. Ara was a good girl. In fact, a very good girl. With the kind of temperament he possessed, a girl like Ara could prove to be a good friend. Maybe he could make friends besides Ara... he had to put his life on a new track. A track on which it was easy to walk.
Before today, he had never waited for the school to open. The thought of a laughing and smiling ordinary school life in a circle of friends was so beautiful that he temporarily forgot every fear and danger.
********
On the last night of the past month,
I made a vow to myself...
From the fragrant night to the bright morning,
I have repeated that vow...
Listen, beautiful March morning, spreading over my evening!
Listen a little, to the chirping of these birds...
Observe!
Even the cuckoo has started some melody...
Look!
The flowers are swaying with joy...
Think!
What could have been such a matter,
On the last night of February....
That has made the morning so fragrant!
In the journey from home to school, there was a sway in his gait... the candle of hope burning in his heart was clearly visible, lit in his eyes...
Before the school opened, he had observed his own self very deeply. As a result of two days of continuous selfnaccounting, the self recognition revealed to him that the root of more than half his problems was his own self... his weakness, which "people" took advantage of.
Mr Kang, although wasn't not the best father, he himself had remained his own enemy.... Perhaps a strange addiction to becoming a victim by hiding his weaknesses under the veil of his father's tyranny had taken hold of him.....
"I just have to take a little courage...!!" he had told himself, and then came all the way saying the same. Patting his silky hair with his hands and walking with a balanced gait, he had entered his class...
In that class, where good memories were not attached....
In that class, where entering always felt bad to him...
In that class, where some of his bullies were also present....
In that class where Noe Sia was present....!!
Noe Sia was present!!!
All his confidence proved to be a wall of sand. His steps remained where they were...
He forgot all the vows..... all the determinations vanished into thin air... once again, he had reached the backyard in the cold darkness of that cursed night.
Once again, the blood soaked ghost of Mr Noe stood before him...
His color faded very rapidly...
He tried to handle himself, but it was not easy to turn his eyes away from Noe Sia's eyes fixed upon him...
Those eyes were not ordinary...
I told you, didn't I? Those grey eyes were not common in South Korea!!
The tears of those eyes would make you helpless... and the silence of those eyes would turn you still.
Continue