Jean found it hard to believe that just a week ago he had still been running from the fact that he might be attracted to men.
And now, here he was, acting like someone who had always known, like someone who had already accepted it long ago.
But if there was anything he had ever been proud of in his life, it was finally facing it and coming out of the closet even if it was only Shawn who knew in the whole world.
He had decided that he was done running. He couldn't anymore.
Not when he found himself staring at men more than women. Not when he had stopped even glancing at girls' magazines, and his room had slowly started filling with pictures of men instead.
Not when he watched a man and a woman having sex and felt almost nothing, only for curiosity to push him toward videos of men together, where his body reacted so strongly it left him shaken, burning with a need he could barely control.
Not when he had been with girls and couldn't stay present, his mind drifting to the men he had seen in the videos, imagining being with them instead, imagining what it would feel like if it was a man touching him.
So no.
He was done running.
It had been his eighteenth birthday just a week ago when everything had finally shifted, or maybe it wasn't a decision at all, maybe it was something deeper that forced him into it.
Because no matter how wild that party had been, no matter how many girls had pressed close to him, no matter how many he had kissed, something inside him had remained untouched.
And that was when he finally understood—what he truly wanted was a man to fill that empty space inside him.
But even then, he wasn't ready for everything that came with it.
He didn't want anyone from his high school to know. Those were the same people at his party, the same ones who would turn something like that into a story that wouldn't die anytime soon.
"Jean Green is gay."
Being gay in Haven City wasn't anything new anymore, but that didn't mean people had truly accepted it.
People still stared at people like him as if they had lost their minds. They still questioned why anyone would want someone just like themselves.
In schools, a few students who had come out were still bullied or avoided.
Parents still called it a sin, dragging their children to church to be "fixed." Some even went as far as disowning them.
And now, Jean couldn't help but wonder what it would be like with his own parents.
Maybe they would be disappointed. Maybe ashamed. Maybe they would worry more about how it made them look than about him.
He didn't know.
And he didn't want to know.
That fear had been exactly why, that night, he had walked away from his own party, slipped past his guards without anyone noticing and disappeared into the city.
That was how he had ended up at that gay club. He still remembered it clearly.. the strangeness at first, the uncertainty… and then how quickly it all shifted into something that felt natural, almost like home.
For the first time, he had been surrounded by people who looked at him the way he had always secretly wanted to be looked at.
Men noticing him.
Men approaching him.
Men wanting him.
For a while, that alone had been enough. The warmth of belonging had softened the restless need inside him. Until Shawn walked in.
In that instant, Jean realized something else about himself. He didn't just want a man, he had a type too.
Shawn stood out immediately. Dark hair slightly long, falling over his forehead and brushing the back of his neck. Tall, with a build that wasn't overwhelming but carried quiet strength. Dressed entirely in black, a leather jacket fitting him like it belonged there.
Everything about him pulled Jean in. He watched as Shawn moved to the counter, ordered his drinks, and drank quietly, dismissing anyone who tried to join him.
It almost seemed like he was there only to get drunk and leave, not to interact. But even with that clarity, Jean couldn't look away.
The need to be closer hit him violently.
He told himself it didn't matter that others were being dismissed. He could just go over and talk, there didn't have to be anything more. It felt like even a simple conversation would calm him down.
But he didn't move.
A part of him hoped Shawn would notice him first, make the move instead.
He eventually forced himself closer, ordering the same drink as Shawn, one he had no intention of drinking. He couldn't allow himself to get drunk in a place like that; he just needed a reason to stand there.
"I was going to stay over there, but you made that impossible. Clearly that 'don't come closer' look on you didn't really work on me."
Jean said it calmly and confident, but it wasn't how he felt.
Shawn turned slowly, and their eyes met.
Jean's heart kicked hard in his chest, the attention hitting him stronger than he'd expected. It was what he wanted, and yet, it terrified him.
Still, he didn't back away.
He couldn't read Shawn's expression, couldn't tell what that look meant, but it definitely wasn't welcoming. Even so, Shawn seemed caught off guard, silent for a brief second.