I stared at the empty seat beside me. It was for Ella. I laughed to myself. Even if she did come, would she want to sit with me?
I shifted my bag a little, then left it there anyway.
People were coming in, talking like nothing had changed. Chairs scraping, voices low, some laughing. Normal.
I faced the front.
Class started.
I wrote a few things down, then stopped. The pen stayed in my hand, but I wasn't really paying attention.
The seat beside me stayed empty.
I didn't look at it again.
After a while, I reached for my phone under the table.
Jay: "You ignored me."
I stared at the message for a few seconds, locked my phone and dropped it back in my bag.
The lecturer kept talking. I nodded once or twice, just so it didn't look like I was lost.
I wasn't.
I just wasn't there either.
When class ended, I packed my things slowly.
For a second, I glanced at the seat beside me.
Still empty.
I picked up my bag and stood up.
Outside, my phone buzzed again.
I didn't check it immediately.
I walked a few steps, then stopped.
Took it out.
Jay: "Are you in school?".I looked at it.
Typed.
"Yeah."
Sent.
The reply sent almost immediately.
Jay: "Done with class?"
I looked at the screen for a second.
"Yeah."
There was a short pause.
Then—
Jay: "I'm around."
I read it again.
He didn't say much.
But I understood.
I stood there for a moment, phone in my hand, people walking past me.
I could go to my next class ,Or just… not.
My fingers hovered over the keyboard.
Then I typed.
"Where?"
The message sent.
I slipped my phone back into my bag and started walking slowly, not really sure if I was going to meet him or just moving because I didn't want to stand still.
My phone buzzed again.
I didn't check it immediately this time.
I just kept walking.
Jay: "By the faculty building."
I looked up from my phone. The building wasn't far.
I slipped my phone back into my bag and started walking.
There he was, by the side of the building, one hand in his pocket, the other holding his phone. When he looked up and saw me, he straightened.
"Hey," he said.
"Hi," I replied.
He nodded slightly like he was trying to read me, but didn't say anything else immediately.
"You're done?" he asked.
"Yeah."
There was a short pause.
Then he stepped a little closer. Not too much. I started walking towards the edge of the building.
He followed.
"You've been quiet," he said.
I shrugged. "I'm always like that."
He looked at me like he didn't fully agree.
I looked away.
People passed behind us, talking, moving. It was a bit noisy, one of the reasons I didn't like the outside much.
He shifted his weight.
"You didn't reply me last night," he said.
"I saw it."
"And?"
I didn't answer right away.
Because there wasn't anything to say that wouldn't feel like too much.
"I didn't feel like talking," I said.
He nodded slowly.
Not offended. Just watching me.
Then he spoke again, softer this time.
"You always do that?"
I looked at him.
He didn't smile. He wasn't joking.
Just asking.
And then—
"Are you always like this?"
I looked at him like I didn't understand what he meant.
"Like what?" I asked.
He didn't rush to answer. He just kept looking at me for a second, like he was choosing his words carefully.
Then he spoke, calm.
"Pushing people away."
I went quiet.