After school,I picked up my bag and my things to go home.And I was going home...alone.
And that's because I have no friends.Yet.
I looked around instinctively but I couldn't sight him anywhere.And by him,I meant Aiden.Yeah,you got me,I can't seem to get him out of my head.And I was trying so fucking hard not to think about where he was,what he was doing,who he was with,aarghh!This is killing mee.
I waited outside my school for my mum to pick me up.And I certainly didn't have to wait for long.
I got into the car and my mom asked how my day went,and I replied her halfheartedly.I guess she got the hint that my day wasn't so great so she didn't ask anymore questions.She dropped me off at home and drove to work.She was working late hours today.
When I got home,I went straight to my room.I took a shower and changed my clothes.I felt and looked good.
I picked up my phone to call my bestie,Amara.I needed her advice on what to wear for the party.If there's anyone who knows anything about a good party,it's certainly going to be Amara.
She is a party freak.I usually went with her sometimes.Don't get me wrong,I'm usually invited to all parties at school but I'm afraid to go.Don't ask why, that's a story for another day.
And besides she had her boyfriend to go with.Or should I say boyfriends.Amara wasn't really good at choosing boyfriends.She always got cheated on and left heartbroken.I am glad I don't have to go through all that stress.Yeah,I don't and have never had a boyfriend.But those who know me will find it hard to believe.
I picked up my phone and called her and she picked up almost immediately.
"Hey girlie"she said enthusiastically.
"Hiii"I replied.
"What's up?You suddenly called out of the blue"she said to me.
What does she mean by that?Of course I called to check on her,and I guess to ask for her help.Well whatever.
'Well...I need Ur help on something"I said cautiously.
"I knew it!Well what do u need from me?"she asked, feeling like she had some power over me.I don't blame her though,I blame Becky.
"I have this party this Friday and I am not sure if I want to go or not"
"Are you crazy!?she yelled.
"Girl you know how I feel about parties."I muttered.I was beginning to feel a bit emotional.
"I know that.But you have to let go of the past.And to do that you have to forgive yourself and believe in yourself.You shouldn't let your past define your future or present."she said,softly to me this time.
I didn't say anything.The tears were already flowing by now and I just let them flow freely down my cheeks.I was really tired of pretending to be okay.
"I'm drained,Amara"
"I know.It's not going to be easy at first.It's going to be hard acting like everything's okay but eventually you won't be acting anymore,it will be real because you are truly okay and happy."
I didn't say anything,just nodded even if she couldn't see me.I was too broken to speak.
"Just pour your feelings out,pour it all out.You don't deserve this.You deserve happiness and a lot more.And you can choose to be happy or keep living in the future.Eva just leave the past behind.Be happy,be forgiving, you should forgive yourself and not blame yourself for anything"
"I just want to heal from all of it"I finally managed to say.
"And u will"she replied.
"U will stay with me throughout the ride,right?"I laughed with tears on my face.
"Of course.I will stay with you.So...i guess we have some shopping to do."
I was about to reply when it hit me.She said 'we'.Last time I checked we were about 3 miles apart from each other.
"Hey what do you mean by 'we'.You are not going to drive for hours just to shop with me are you?"
"Well there is no need for that because...I'M IN THE NEW YORK CITY"she practically screamed through the phone.She was set on blocking my eardrums.
"Whattt!Oh my gosh!Why didn't you tell me?"The sadness I was feeling a few minutes ago was gone and now replaced with excitement.
"To surprise you"
"Well I am surprised like crazy.But what are you doing here though?Last time I checked you didn't have any relative here."I asked.
"You are right.My dad is here on a business trip and I told him I wanted to tag along knowing you are here."
"So you skipped school just to see me?"I asked,I was really touched now.
"Of course not,I heard they had hot boys here so I came to take a look."
I let out a giggle."you are impossible,you know that right?"
She laughed at that."I know"
"So when are we going shopping?"she asked.
The party is this Friday so how about tomorrow?That way we have a lot of time to prepare,don't you think?"
""Yeah,I agree"
"Just so you know you are coming with me"
"No, I am not going.I have a busy schedule and I don't have time to party"she said.She was really feeling important.
"Oh so I am jobless?Is that right?"I played along.
"Yes you are"
"But on a serious note I really need you to come with me to the party"
"Why?"
"I need you to come with me because I don't know anyone there.I am new remember?
"Okay, I will go with you.But you are paying for my things"
"Deal"I was too excited to care about expenses.
"I have to go,my dad is calling for me."
"Bye".
Becky is going to be so shocked when she sees me at her party looking hot.She wanted a killer dress,I would give it to her.