I don't know how long we stay like that. Hands touching. Not speaking. Just… existing in the moment.
Time feels weird. Slower. Heavier. Like everything outside of this doesn't matter. Like it's just, us.
I swallow, glancing down at our hands again. Still there. Still real.
"…This is new," I mumble.
Lucifer lets out a quiet breath that almost sounds like a laugh. "Yes," he says. "It is." I huff slightly, embarrassed. "I mean—it's obvious, but…"
"I know what you meant." Of course he does. He always does. That should be annoying. But it's not. It's...
Comforting.
My grip shifts slightly against his without thinking. And this time. I don't freeze. I don't panic. I just… let it happen. Lucifer watches the movement. Then slowly, carefully, he moves closer.
Not a lot. Just enough. The space between us shrinks. And suddenly, I'm very aware of everything again. The couch. The quiet. The way our knees are almost touching now. My heartbeat picks up again. Loud. Unsteady.
"Is this okay?" he asks.
His voice is lower now. More careful. Like he actually means it. Like he won't move if I say no.
And that. That matters. It matters more than I expected. I nod before I can overthink it. "…Yeah."
My voice is barely above a whisper. But he hears it. Of course he does. He shifts just slightly closer. And now. Now there's almost no space left.
My breath catches. Because this feels, different. Bigger. More dangerous. My gaze lifts. Meets his. And for a second, everything else disappears.
No thoughts. No overthinking. Just him. Looking at me like that. Like I'm something important. Like I'm something he wants.
My chest tightens.
"Arlo," he says quietly. I don't answer. I can't. Because I already know what this is. Or at least, what it could be.
His gaze drops. To my lips. My stomach flips. Oh. Oh. My breath stutters slightly.
Because now. Now I really don't know what to do. Do I move? Do I stay still? Do I-
His hand shifts slightly against mine. A small grounding movement. Like he's reminding me he's still there. That this is real. That I can stop this. Anytime.
But I don't. I don't stop it. I don't move away. And neither does he. He leans in.
Slow. Careful. Close enough now that I can feel his breath. Warm. Steady. My heart is going insane. This is it. This is actually happening.
And I—
"…Wait," I whisper. He stops instantly. No hesitation. No frustration. Just… stops. Pulls back slightly.
Enough to look at me. "Okay," he says.
Simple. Calm. Like it's not a problem. Like I didn't just stop, whatever that was about to be.
"I just—" I swallow. "I've never—"
"I know."
The words are soft. Understanding.
"I haven't either," he adds.
That makes something in my chest loosen.
Because right. He hasn't. We're both here. Equally lost. Equally new.
I let out a small breath. "…This is a lot."
"Yes," he agrees.
A pause. Then.
"We can go slower." My eyes flick back up to his.
"…Slower?"
He nods once. "There's no rush." And for the first time. That doesn't scare me. It doesn't feel like pressure. It doesn't feel like expectation. It just feels… Safe.
My fingers tighten slightly around his again. Still there. Still warm.
"…Okay," I say quietly.
And this time. I don't feel like running.