Mika stared at her phone, San's message and Leo's message still sitting there, both waiting, both quiet in their own way.She typed to San, "Maybe tomorrow," then paused and didn't send it.She typed to Leo, "Okay," then stopped again.Her fingers slowly dropped. "Why does this feel like I'm choosing something bigger than just a day?" she whispered.
The next morning, she walked into school with that same question still sitting in her chest."Mika!" Akira's voice came from behind, softer than before, almost careful.Mika turned. "Hey.""Can I walk with you?" Akira asked.Mika nodded slightly.
They walked side by side, not as close as before, but not distant either."I've been trying," Akira said after a moment. "To… be better."Mika looked at her. "I can see that."Akira gave a small smile. "It's harder than I thought.""Yeah," Mika replied quietly. "It is."
There was a small silence."Do you still hate me?" Akira asked suddenly.Mika shook her head. "No… I was hurt, not hateful."Akira looked relieved, but her eyes still held guilt."I don't want to lose you again," she said.Mika didn't answer immediately. "Then don't turn me into something I'm not," she said softly.Akira nodded. "I won't."
From a distance, San saw them walking together.He stopped for a second, his expression unreadable, then forced a smile as he walked over."Wow, look at this," he said lightly. "The duo is back."Akira glanced at him. "We're trying."San nodded. "That's good."Mika looked at him. "You okay?""Yeah," he smiled quickly. "Why wouldn't I be?"But this time, Mika noticed it clearly.The smile didn't stay long enough.
Later, Mika sat in the library with Leo."You seem distracted," he said."I feel like I'm being pulled in different directions," Mika admitted.Leo closed his book. "By people?"Mika nodded."And what do you want?" he asked calmly."I don't know," she said honestly. "I don't want to hurt anyone."Leo looked at her steadily. "You can't make choices based only on avoiding pain."Mika frowned slightly. "Then what do I base them on?""On truth," he replied. "Even if it's uncomfortable."
Mika looked down, her thoughts getting heavier again.
That afternoon, San caught up to her near the stairs."Hey, you disappeared," he said."I was in the library," Mika replied."With Leo?""Yeah."San nodded slowly. "You like being there, don't you?""It's quiet," Mika said. "It helps.""And I don't?" San asked, smiling but watching her closely."You help too," Mika said. "Just differently."San looked away for a moment. "Different again…"
Mika stepped closer. "Why does that bother you?"San laughed lightly. "It doesn't.""It does," Mika said softly.San stayed quiet.Then finally—"Because I don't want to be just 'different,' Mika. I want to matter."
Mika's chest tightened. "You do matter.""Then why does it feel like I'm slowly becoming less important?" he asked quietly.
She didn't have an answer.And that silence… said everything.
That night, Mika sat with her notebook again."I think I'm hurting people without meaning to.I'm trying to fix myself, but I feel like I'm breaking others.Is it selfish to choose myself?"
She stared at the words, her eyes slightly wet.
At the same time, San sat alone in his room, staring at his phone.Her chat was open.He typed, "Do you even need me anymore?"Then deleted it quickly.He threw his phone aside and leaned back. "Why does it feel like I'm losing her without anything even happening?" he muttered.
In another place, Leo sat quietly, his book open but unread.He closed it slowly, his thoughts somewhere else."She's struggling," he murmured to himself. "But she's getting closer to the truth."
The next day, Mika walked into school, her heart already feeling heavy again.San didn't come to her.Leo was already in the library.Akira waved from a distance.
Three different directions.Three different feelings.
Mika stood still for a moment.
"Why does my heart feel like it's splitting?" she whispered.