Chapter 7: Stop Fighting, This Won't Kill Anyone
"This is a bit troublesome..." March 7th muttered, her delicate brows knitting together. She tapped her chin, a sudden thought sparking in her vibrant pink-and-blue eyes, before she spun around to face Leon. "By the way, you were standing right next to them when they woke up. Do you guys know each other?"
"His name is Caelus, and she is Stelle," Leon introduced with absolute, unbothered calm. The corners of his lips curled into a faint, highly amused smile. "And I am their father."
Internally, Leon justified the outrageous claim with perfect logic. After all, he had personally shaped one of the Stellarons currently resting within their bodies. Claiming the title of father didn't seem entirely unreasonable, did it?
"Huh?" March 7th's eyes blew wide open. She stared at him, utterly incredulous, her gaze darting between the tall, youthful Leon and the two equally grown adults beside him. "You are their dad? But... you don't look anywhere near old enough for that!"
"Father?" Stelle tilted her head, looking up at Leon. A deep, hazy confusion swirled in her golden eyes, yet beneath the amnesia, an indescribable sense of familiarity tugged at her instincts.
"Hey there, good daughter." Leon's smile widened into something warm and teasing. He reached out, casually ruffling Stelle's ash-gray hair until it was a messy bird's nest.
"So, I am your son..." Caelus muttered, rubbing his chin as the gears turned in his head. A look of deep realization suddenly washed over his face. "Which means I am Stelle's older brother, right?"
Honestly, ever since Caelus opened his eyes, he had felt an inexplicable connection to the man standing before him. So this was his father! No wonder his presence felt so natural.
Leon simply nodded, his expression the picture of solemn paternal pride. 'Ah, yes, yes, yes. That is exactly how it works.'
"Wrong!" Stelle immediately swatted Caelus's arm, her competitive instincts overriding her confusion. "I am the older sister! You are the younger brother!"
"No way. I am definitely the older brother, which makes you the little sister." Caelus crossed his arms, refusing to yield an inch of ground.
"I was clearly born first!" Stelle argued vehemently, stepping right into his personal space.
"Is that so?" Caelus raised a skeptical eyebrow, a smug smirk playing on his lips. "But didn't you just say a minute ago that you couldn't remember anything?"
"I remember this specific part very clearly! I came first!" Stelle planted her hands firmly on her hips, her tone ringing with absolute, unquestionable authority. This amnesiac younger brother actually wanted to usurp the throne and claim seniority? Absolutely not on her watch!
"Stop fighting, stop fighting. Arguing like this won't kill anyone." Leon sighed, playing the role of a weary peacemaker. He reached into his coat pocket and, with casual fluidity, pulled out two heavy, wicked-looking machetes. He offered one to Stelle and the other to Caelus. "Here, take these. This is how you can actually kill someone!"
March 7th stared in dead silence.
Dan Heng closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Wait a second..." March 7th scratched her head, her ahoge twitching in sheer distress. She felt as though the world had suddenly derailed into a chaotic comedy she couldn't comprehend. "Are you really their father?!"
Dan Heng's right eyelid twitched. He observed Leon's utterly unhinged parenting methods, and a terrible suspicion began to take root in his mind. The more he looked at this guy, the more he resembled a certain faction of lunatics. A Masked Fool.
Clatter.
As if responding to Dan Heng's internal monologue, a theatrical mask bearing a wide, exaggerated smile slipped out of Leon's pocket and hit the floorboards.
Leon stared at the mask.
'Aha, you absolute jerk!'Leon cursed internally.'Making trouble for me again, huh?!'
Dan Heng stared at the mask.
Confirmed. The man was definitely a Masked Fool.
"Huh? Leon, you dropped your mask." March 7th blinked, leaning in to inspect the grinning face painted on the porcelain. "Why does that thing feel so familiar? I swear I have seen it somewhere before..."
"No, your eyes are playing tricks on you." Leon smoothly scooped the mask off the floor, his expression completely unfazed. "It is just not a good idea to stuff too many things into one pocket. This junk always manages to fall out on its own." He shoved the smiling artifact back into his coat as if nothing had happened.
He breathed a quiet sigh of relief. It was a stroke of luck that the perpetually cheerful March 7th didn't immediately recognize the symbol of Elation. But Dan Heng? The archivist's silent, piercing gaze practically screamed that he knew exactly what it was.
And Aha... that Aeon really needed to stop messing around! Leon didn't mind being gifted a mask, but did it have to possess a comedic timing of its own? A sudden, chilling thought crossed Leon's mind. Wait a minute. This mask wasn't actually Aha in disguise, was it? Knowing the Aeon of Elation, the possibility was disturbingly high.
"Is that really the case?" March 7th mumbled, still scratching her head. She was certain she had seen that exact grinning face buried somewhere within the Data Bank's vast archives. But if the memory wouldn't surface, there was no point forcing it. Besides, Dan Heng managed the Data Bank. He memorized everything. Since Dan Heng wasn't saying anything, it must be perfectly fine!
"Dad, you tell us. Who is older?" Seeing Leon casually defuse the situation with deadly weapons, Stelle's golden eyes lit up with a new strategy.
Right! Wasn't their father standing right here? How could a parent not know the birth order of his own children? Stelle immediately latched onto Leon's arm, shaking it slightly. Her usual deadpan tone suddenly shifted, taking on a surprisingly coquettish whine. "Dad, you tell us..."
Caelus mirrored her, folding his arms across his chest and casting a demanding gaze toward Leon. He stood tall, waiting for a fair and just verdict.
Wisely, the two amnesiac siblings had chosen to ignore the gleaming machetes Leon had offered, opting instead for a battle of parental favoritism.
Oh boy. Another choice to make.
Leon felt his chronic indecisiveness flaring up. If there was one thing he truly hated in this universe, it was being forced to pick a side.
"How about this," Leon began, his tone entirely serious as he proposed a flawless solution. "I will do eeny, meeny, miny, moe. Whoever my finger lands on gets to be the older sibling. How does that sound?"
March 7th stared.
Dan Heng sighed.
Stelle blinked.
Caelus frowned.
"That is way too rash!" March 7th finally exploded, throwing her hands up in exasperation. "Hey, hey, hey! Are you seriously their father?! What kind of dad decides birth order with a nursery rhyme?! Besides, is it really that important who gets to be the older sibling?"
"Of course it is important!" Stelle and Caelus snapped their heads toward her, shouting in perfect, synchronized unison.
March 7th flinched back. Fine. These two were definitely siblings. There was absolutely no doubt about it.
"Sigh..." Dan Heng let out a long, thoroughly exhausted breath, looking as though he had aged ten years in the span of five minutes. "Now is not the time to argue about trivialities. March, you take them to the Master Control Zone to meet up with Asta first. I will go track down Arlan and bring him back."
"Hmm, okay. You be careful out there, Dan Heng," March 7th nodded, her cheerful demeanor returning in a flash.
After splitting up from the stoic archivist, the group handled the metallic corridors of the Herta Space Station. Along the way, March 7th provided a rapid-fire introduction to the station and the current crisis. Listening to her lively explanations, Stelle and Caelus finally grasped the gravity of their situation.
"By the way," March 7th paused her tour guide routine, casting a highly suspicious glance over her shoulder. "Are you really their dad?"
She still found it incredibly hard to swallow. Leon looked way too young, way too carefree, and way too ridiculous to be the father of two fully grown adults.
"It is fake. I was just messing with you guys." Leon shrugged, a lazy smile spreading across his face.
Looking at March 7th's wide, innocent eyes, he actually felt a tiny prick of guilt. He couldn't bear to keep stringing the poor girl along. In all honesty, Dan Heng had probably figured out it was a joke from the very beginning; the guy just hadn't bothered to call him out on it.
"What?!" March 7th halted in her tracks, utterly speechless. "Fake?!"
"You actually deceived us!" Stelle gasped, clutching her chest as if she had been shot. She looked as though the sky had shattered and fallen directly onto her shoulders. "You tricked me into calling you Dad! I am so devastated... I demand immediate compensation for severe emotional distress! Without a few thousand, no, tens of thousands of Credits, I will never recover from this trauma!"
Acting out her grief, Stelle immediately marched over to a nearby corner, squatted down, and began gloomily drawing circles on the floor panels with her finger.
"To think you were actually this kind of person. We severely misjudged you." Caelus shook his head in deep disappointment. He walked over and squatted right next to Stelle. The gloomy corner of despair officially went from a solo act to a duo performance.
"Hey, hey! Go comfort them!" March 7th panicked, shoving Leon's shoulder. She looked at the two heartbroken amnesiacs huddled in the corner. "You caused this mess, so you better solve it yourself!"
"What is the rush? Relax." Leon remained completely unbothered, crossing his arms with an amused snort.
Stelle and Caelus were clearly putting on a show. Through the gaps in their fingers, he could see their golden eyes secretly peeking over to gauge his reaction. Anyone who actually believed these two raccoons felt the sky was falling deserved to fall right into their extortion trap.
"Tell you what. To show my deepest, most sincere apologies, I will give you guys this." Leon reached into his seemingly bottomless pockets and pulled out two crystalline objects.
The gems caught the artificial lights of the corridor, shimmering with a stunning gradient that shifted from a fiery orange to a deep, cosmic blue. They were undeniably beautiful.
If any Trailblazer from his past life were standing here right now, their eyes would instantly turn bloodshot with greed. They would immediately recognize the precious stones for what they were: Stellar Jade.
"Wow. Good stuff."
In a flash, Stelle and Caelus's depression vanished instantly. Like teleporting phantoms, the two siblings materialized directly beside Leon, their eyes locked onto the glowing gems like moths to a flame. "What is this?"
"This little trinket is called Stellar Jade," Leon explained, tossing the gems lightly in his palm. "It does not have any grand, world-saving uses. Mostly, it just looks really good." He paused, his smile turning sly. "But, of course, it can be sold for a massive amount of Credits."
Although Stellar Jade was the absolute lifeblood and most valuable core currency in the game he once knew, here in the reality of the Honkai: Star Rail universe, it functioned a bit differently. It was essentially a highly prized precious mineral, much like gold or silver, acting as a universally accepted equivalent for immense wealth.
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