This was so fun! Was it not? I looked at the corkboard that sat in the middle of my room, crisscrossed with red lines. Rows of pictures, men, and women looked at me with their eyes. Dancing, I twirled the red marker in my hand, looking, looking, looking, until—ha! I had found him. Iron Knight.
I haphazardly crossed his face out with two red splotches, marking his eyes with large Xs. Gorgeous, it was really. His face, this board. I wasn't quite sure what the red lines were for, but what of it? It looked pretty cool.
Still dancing, my face was adorned with a smile as I looked around my room. It was as evil villain as I could get it. The corkboard, lined with red yarn and pictures in the middle, my torture seat on the left, the fridge to the left, my bed at the opposite side so the blood wouldn't get on it, and finally a proper, large bookcase to seal off the deal.
My eyes drew on the next target, as I stopped swirling along. Not drunk or anything, of course. There she was. She was really, really beautiful. What was her name again? Ah, Nebula.
I giggled, looking at her picture. There was a pleasure in teaching as much as there was in hurting. Teaching her about the hypocrisy and corruption of the supers. Just imagining her expression, her words, gave me joy to no end.
I collapsed into my spinning chair, sitting with its back to my front like a proper villain. I was in thought, tapping the red marker against my chin.
What could I do? Something interesting, fun. Let's see—a dilemma. She seems weak-minded. Giving her a choice might be best. Something more dramatic. Not personal, but more—explosive. I laughed, thinking of her expression.
But maybe I needed to research her further. Maybe anything personal might arise that might give me more clues.
I pushed off with my legs to my bed, which had my high-tech, state-of-the-art computer on it. It was like 50 bucks.
Setting the laptop on my lap, I began to research online. The UHA always outlined a basic description of each super in their database. After a quick search, I had Nebula's information pulled up in front of me.
I almost laughed again. Am I laughing too much? No matter. Nebula was a new super, with no records of any achievements. And her powers were even more hilarious.
Nebula, the site read, Special. Powers: Medium Flight and ? Control of clouds.
Question mark? I thought to myself. Question mark? What in the world did that mean? What did control of clouds have to do with anything?
I needed more information. I used my sight. I willed myself to see, to see what I could not. I could have materialized the information right in front of me, making the words appear.
But I'm not an idiot. Why would I do that?
I simply went on Foofle and used my power to "see" her real name.
And then I just looked at the Fistagram account about her. Her real name was—Relia Sherred. Interesting name.
I spent the better part of the day looking into her. There was nothing special, really. Just a normal woman. Her cover was working at the bank, which was located near the place I had killed Iron Knight. That was why she was there.
She had a regular family, but no one who had any special circumstances. So while I could pursue it, anything personal didn't really draw me in, you know. Where would be the fun in that?
Instead, I needed something else. Something she would not expect. Looking at her photos, I saw something. A boat. I looked back at the bombs I had left over.
And then I got it. Snapping my fingers, I stood up. I got it. I was a genius. I was totally not ripping off anyone's idea.
***
It was the fifteenth of June, and two Ferries were driving off the port into the river. It was a disgusting river, filled with the nastiest creations of human waste, but nevertheless, it was used as a transportation system.
Inside the first ferry were regulars, a group of new settlers to one of the newly restored districts. They were filled with hopes and dreams of a new life. The other was filled with minor Villains and regular criminals, bunched together and tied both figuratively and literally.
As the two ferries began to cross into the middle of the river, both suddenly stopped. Inside, passengers began to converse about the sudden stoppage, but the other ferry, clearly visible through the clear windows, reassured them as it was also stopping. It was most likely a planned stoppage, whatever purpose it might serve.
The intercom buzzed on the Ferry.
Bzzzz… Passengers? Passengers? Is this working correctly?
I paused for dramatic effect, though no one did answer my calls on the intercom; the listening devices I had planted inside the boat captured nothing but silence.
I began again.
Well, aren't you guys lucky? This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, folks. You guys are going to be part of a social experiment! Exciting, right?!
A small grin escaped my face as I heard one of the passengers scream, "Villain attack!"
No, no, no, if you think this is a Villain attack, you are seriously mistaken. Let's say… this is a Villain surprise! Better no?
No one answered, though it was a rhetorical question in their defense.
Using my magic, or as some people call it diesel fuel and ammonium nitrate, I will blow up both ferries sky high. If anyone tries to escape, they will die immediately. But—there is a twist. Tonight, you guys are going to learn a bit about yourselves. Who do you guys think you are? It's gonna be interesting, don't you think?
Using the camera I had also planted, I looked at the expressions of the passengers. The regulars were all shitting themselves, while the Villains, who at the beginning had smiled in glee, were also in similar states of despair.
But… there's no need for all of you to die. That would be a waste. So I've left you both a little present.
As I stood next to the harbor, I glanced at the two remote-controlled detonators in my hands, their red buttons tempting, so tempting to press. It would be magnificent to see the explosions, the art that it would create. But no… I had to hold it in. I began talking into the mic attached to my coat again.
Each of you, or more specifically each Ferry, has the remote to blow up the other boat. At midnight, specifically in 20 minutes, if neither you have pressed the remote, then—who knows what will happen? You choose. Be- The Worst Villains of New London... Or the sweet regulars that Heroes work so hard to protect? Oh, and you might want to decide quickly, because the people on the other boat may not be quite so noble.
Bzzz. I cut the connection.
I stared into the river again; though it wasn't as beautiful at night, it still had a certain quality to it under the sun.
I gave one last look at the small string attached between the two trees. Thin, razor sharp, it hung tight between the two trees. This was for Nebula.
I sighed, looking back at the river. I wanted a cigarette but had forgotten one.
On the boats, chaos reigned.
"They're going to push the button! Push it before they do!" One man in a business suit, starkly out of place in the boat, began to rush toward the captain who held the remote. He was quickly held back by some of the crew. The other passengers began to murmur and avoid eye contact.
A mother pushed to the front of the crowd.
"I have a baby! Please! We don't all have to die. All those men had their chance-"
The captain spoke up. "We shouldn't even be discussing this. It could be fake. He didn't say what would happen if we didn't touch the—"
"What is there to discuss!" another passenger screamed. "It's them or us. Why should we let villains live."'
One more passenger let his voice ring out: "Let's hold it to a vote."
After a few seconds of silence, the captain of the passenger ship put on a look of resignation. "We will hold a vote. We are a democracy. Whoever votes to use the remote will put a black X on their paper, while not pushing it will leave it empty. Understood?"
Then began a wild scurrying of passing out torn pieces of paper and markers throughout the boat. In the end, the papers were all compiled, and the Captain began to count them, one by one.
On the other hand, in the prisoner's boats, the prisoners all stared down at the security officer who held the remote. He gulped. They began to inch closer and closer as the guards began to block them. Gunshots rang into the air, but they only pulled the crowd back slightly before they came crawling back like a tiger.
Back on the passenger ship, the vote had been decided. The captain looked at the paper with the results in his hands and back at the crowd.
"There are—96 votes against and… 269 votes for."
"Then use the remote, what are you waiting for!"
"..."
The captain looked at the remote in his hands before placing it down on the table before him.
"I can't not do it. I voted the same as you all. But that doesn't mean I should be the one to push the button."
"But you are-"
"NO! Ahhhh. Someone else has to do it."
The passengers looked around at each other, averting their gazes.
…
A prisoner with black tattoos and a body that hinted at a physical superpower stood in front of the crowd, facing the line of guards. He yelled at the head Warden who stood behind the line, in obvious fear and cowering with the remote in his hands. His arms were clearly shaking.
"Give me the remote."
His voice cut through the noise.
"You want to live, I know, but you guys don't know how to kill. "
The Warden began shaking his head, but he glanced at the clock in the wall, time ticking by closer and closer to midnight, and back at the metal remote in his hands. It felt cold in his touch, too cold.
The tattooed man raised his hands and pointed at the crowd behind him.
"These are dangerous men, you know this. They will kill you and take the remote anyway. Give it to me, and tell people I took it by force… give it to me and I'll do what you should've done ten minutes ago."
The Warden looked back and forth between the remote in his hands and the prisoner in front of the guards. They began to glance toward the Warden, seeking his decision on what he would do. After a moment of hesitation, the Warden began to step forward, one by one. Each step felt like sludge to him, but eventually, he made it to the guards.
Slowly, hesitantly, his arms shaking, the warden reached out with the remote to the prisoner in front of him. In an instant, before he could think any further about his decision, the huge, tattooed prisoner snatched the remote away from his hands. The crowd, guard included, surged away from him as if he had a virus.
After staring at the remote for a couple of seconds, the prisoner held the gray metal up in the air.
"This decision will save your lives. We may be prisoners, we may be villains, but we are no worse than the scum of humanity that stands in the other boat. Do not have a guilty conscience. It is either them or us, and we—
The ferry blew up in a magnificent blaze. On the other ferry, the captain stood, with the remote in hand, sweat matting his forehead as he collapsed on the ground.
As the first explosion rocked the river, I glanced at the resulting explosion. I felt… relief in my heart. Not because of the fact that my plan had worked, I knew this was how the people would react. It was, of course, a chance of which boat would explode first, but this was all a game of probability. These people were sheep, and the fact that it was more likely the regulars who pressed the remote was obvious.
The explosion itself was beautiful , beautiful enough that I continued to stare at the remains of the explosion for quite a while. The bombs had gone off spectacularly, and as chunks of the ferry blasted into the air, it was like an intricate firework, one from the future that had actual tangible parts to it.
It was time for stage 2.
I glanced at my watch and began to look around with my gift to identify where the person, more importantly, the super I was waiting for. Nebula. She had to be taught a lesson about humanity, and this one would be quite the first.
After a while, I spotted her flying body in the air. I knew she would be here, as this time was her usual route between her home and workplace, and closest to her route. In the 10 minutes that had passed, the UHA had likely posted a warning to all supers that a Villain attack was occurring, and she had probably rushed over.
Last time she had been caught unawares, but she had obviously learned her lesson, wearing a super suit. It was a mixture of purple and blue, with no cape, which was good, and a small golden star adorned her chest. Of course, I knew it was Nebula from my power.
After checking the wire one last time, I called out for her.
"Nebula! Over here!"
At my words, I could see her gaze turning toward me and her movement faltering in midair. If only I could have seen her expression in person. She rushed toward me as if she were a dog catching sight of a squirrel, and landed with a thud onto the ground before me. Then she struck a fighting pose, her burning eyes digging into my head, though with my blindfold, I wasn't sure what she was glaring into, not my eyes certainly. Perhaps it was my beautiful face. Nevertheless, she still hasn't learned to attack on sight. Not good. But it could be learned.
"Oh, my Nebula! So good to see you, have you come for the fireworks as well?" I pointed at the glorious, picture-perfect scene of the ferry sinking in burning hell behind me. "Amazing isn't it? Amazing what these regulars can do."
She continued to glare at me and didn't respond. Hmmmm. Refusing to speak to me? She would sooner or later.
"Why? Anything wrong? Is the sight too glorious for you? I can understand, it is your first time after all. But you shouldn't be doing this, you are a super right?"
"..."
After a few seconds, she opened her mouth.
"You-you dirty, disgusting piece of shit!" It didn't feel right for a curse to come out of her mouth, but I digress. "You, you evil Villain! How could you do this? Those innoce-"
"Oh no, no no. I wouldn't call them all innocent. Sure, there were innocents, but some of them… hmmmm… let's see if I remember here. Ah. Mr. Jacobs, I think it was, he was a murderer and a rapist, released just after a few years in prison. From my standards, he should have been put to death."
She stood there for a moment, indignant, watching me.
I looked again at the two ferries, one destroyed and one not, floating amidst a river aglow in flames. It was time for the speech.
"Nebula," I said, dramatically turning around. "Relia Sherred." At her name, she stiffened, her eyes widening. "I will show you something about humans. They are all terrible, really. I mean, look at them on the boat." I threw my phone at her, which she fumbled. On the screen, the regulars were crowding around the windows to look at the fire, some panicking, others relieved.
"You know," I continued. "I wasn't going to explode any of the bombs. I didn't say what was going to happen if none of them pressed it. But guess what? The regulars did. Nebula. This is humanity. In all its ugly, grotesque form. Beautiful, isn't it?"
Ah, as I watched her expression, looking upon the carnage. She was more beautiful like this, really.
I grabbed the radio that controlled the intercom on the ferry.
Hello Passengers! Is this working? I looked over to the phone, which was still in the hand of shocked Nebula. The regulars were looking up.
Good, good, it works. Now, don't I have some good news for you folks! You guys did it! Congratulations! It's your big day! Incredible job!
I clapped into the radio. clap, clap, clap. They didn't respond. Sadness. But it didn't matter.
You know, if you guys hadn't pushed the remote, nothing would have happened! You guys just committed your first murder. Or your second, depending on your name. Nice. Big thumbs up.
I smiled, looking at the shocked faces and the crying. Really, they were so weak. What had they done except kill a couple of hundred?
Nebula looked up, about to fly at me. I raised a hand, and she faltered. Good
How do you guys feel? Even worse than me, I suppose.
Still no response. The captain who had pushed the remote was in a fetal position. I laughed. It was quite hilarious, you know, watching a grown man do that.
Anyway. Thanks for playing my game. You guys were great. Until next time!
With those words, I shut off the intercom and faced Nebula again.
She was really angry now. Her fists were clenched, her eyes red, and she looked at me as if I had committed some grave crime. Didn't she see? This was what people were. Selfish, imbecilic… Uhm, all of that, you know what I mean.
"Hey Nebula. Can't you—"
"Be quiet villain. In the name of the UHA, I'm going to capture you."
"That's great and all, but—" It was time for the last part. "—do you need this remote? It's connected to the bombs on the boat."
She looked at the remote in my hand, the comically large red button pulsing. She hesitated.
"Here," I said, beginning to reach out. "Here it—oops!" I dropped the remote on the floor, face down. The button was pressed.
Nebula and I looked at each other. I looked at the boat, the ferry, the whatever, on the river. Why wasn't it—
The second explosion rocked the river. Beautiful, just as the first one. All the regulars were dead, I'm sure. Nice.
Nebula said no more. Dropping the phone, she rushed forward, activating her power. Ah, it was over then. She didn't even give me the chance to explain more.
The wire still hung between us.
When she rushed forward, her neck slipped silently between the wire. Perfectly, as I had used my power to see.
For a moment, she was in the air. Then her body was split, and she collapsed onto the ground. Blood pooled on the grass.
Dear audience. Don't forget what I am. I am not a hero. This is not a fairy tale. I may be intensely funny and talented and better than anyone else, but—I am who I am. A villain. The Hanged Mna. The Hngaged Man. The Hangeed Men. FUC—