"Where's the core membership of my 'Lonely Hearts Brigade' when I need them?"
Walking down the bustling streets, watching couples flaunting their affection at every turn, Izuru felt a surge of indignation. He wanted to roar at the sky in protest, but a second later, he deflated.
The romantic "flag" event from being trapped in the shed with Yotsuba was still playing on a loop in his mind. Specifically, the scent of her skin—so different from Kaguya's—and the sheer, overwhelming sensation of her "womanly pride" that seemed to outclass Kaguya's by a factor of a hundred... Honestly, it made him want to rush home and celebrate with his own '460mm Yamato-class' artillery!
But then, the memory of Kaguya's eyes hit him like a physical blow. That cold, disdainful stare, as if she were looking at the world's most repulsive cockroach, made his skin crawl. She hadn't even dropped her usual correction, "It's not Yashoku, it's Kaguya." She had just stood there, a yandere black aura practically radiating off her, muttering horrific things that sounded exactly like what Makoto Itou heard a second before he "departed for the sun."
Fortunately, at that critical juncture, the call from Kaguya's maid had acted as a lifeline. If not for that, Izuru would be facing a social suspension—or a full-blown Shuraba—right now.
Yet, reflecting on that "Pseudo-Shuraba" tragedy, beyond the relief of survival, a nagging doubt remained.
Why did Kaguya go full blackened-yandere just because she saw him and Yotsuba in an accidental, ambiguous pose?
Based on his understanding of tropes, that kind of reaction only happens when someone sees their crush getting cozy with another "vixen." Does this mean he's already conquered Kaguya?
No, no way. Impossible.
They've only known each other for a few days. There was no "love at first sight" cliché, so how could he have broken the highest-difficulty "Ice Queen" route this fast?
Still, looking back at Kaguya's behavior since the first day of school yesterday, Izuru grew more bewildered.
On day one, she practically forced him into a bet and pulled every string to make him Student Council President. It had branded him as her "gigolo" in the eyes of the school. It felt like she was intentionally closing the distance—a move Izuru still couldn't fathom.
After all, it took Miyuki Shirogane a whole year of "blazing heart" tactical warfare to melt that girl's exterior!
How did he do it in days? And why did she transfer from that elite academy to this school in the first place? Did Shirogane fail to win her over in that year? And if so, why was she getting tangled up with him now?
What exactly was going on?
Izuru was a mess of curiosity and doubt. He also felt uneasy about today's events, particularly that lunch with Itsuki.
While the situations with Miku and Yotsuba were on his mind, they felt... manageable. But Itsuki's "heart as big as her chest" was a total enigma!
Why, after he accidentally blurted out the truth and called her a 'Meat Bun Monster,' did she not get angry? Or rather, even if she was mad, why did she suppress it and force a friendly smile?
Maybe because she's a transfer student and doesn't want to beef with the Student Council President?
No, impossible. Itsuki isn't that diplomatic.
So, what's the angle?
"Itsuki is definitely hiding something big. I'll have to interact with her more to figure it out..."
Izuru muttered to himself as he stepped into a secluded, quiet ramen shop with a sign that read 'Ichiraku Ramen.' He looked at the middle-aged man behind the counter and greeted him with a grin.
"Old man Ichiraku, the usual. Pork ramen but hold the noodles, water but make it dry, and a 'wife pastry' without the wife!"
"You brat, what kind of order is that? If I had stuff like that, I'd be buying it myself! Name your price, I'd pay it!"
The old man shot back with a practiced, joking scolding, but his hands moved with honest precision. He began prepping a bowl of tonkotsu ramen with expert speed, then slid a cold can of "Otaku's Happy Juice" toward Izuru.
"I only order it because I trust your skills, old man. Ever heard the story of 'Mokichi' the carpenter?"
Izuru began his usual banter as he popped the tab on his drink.
"Enough with the weird stories. Like I don't know your habit of talking nonsense. Last time you told Ayame that story about 'How to Raise a Boring Girlfriend' (Saekano), and she still thinks some otaku is going to show up and turn her into a main heroine!"
The corner of the old man's mouth twitched. He cursed with an annoyed tone that carried an undercurrent of fondness; these exchanges had clearly become a ritual for them.
A ritual... since moving to this world, Izuru ate here every night. He couldn't cook, and there was no one to cook for him. Going home meant facing an empty, quiet house—a reality that had only been sinking in for a few days.
Izuru shook his head, clearing the melancholy. He began to casually scan the shop.
As usual, the place was empty. Despite the broth being better than anything in a five-star hotel, the remote location and retro (verging on outdated) decor didn't draw a crowd.
But that was why Izuru liked it. It was peaceful, and the ramen was elite.
Wait.
Izuru's eyes widened as they swept toward the corner of the shop. He stared at a girl there, his disbelief plain on his face.
She didn't just have a figure that rivaled the Nakano quints; she had silky black hair that could go toe-to-toe with Yukino or Kaguya.
But the kicker—the absolute mind-blower—was that she was wearing a provocatively enticing Bunny Girl outfit!
What's more, Izuru knew exactly who she was.
A child star who had been on TV since she was little before skyrocketing into a super-popular actress...
A senior at his very own school, the reigning queen of the third-year class...
And a "hard worker" Izuru knew inside and out—long before he ever set foot in this world.
"Bunny Girl-senpai... Sakurajima Mai?"
Izuru stared at her without blinking, his voice a low murmur as he identified the girl before him...