My heart was pounding like crazy and my face felt like it was about to burst from the heat.
Wow, I thought I was going to die of embarrassment.
'That celebration' in front of all those spectators.
Everyone was staring at me, so just walking up there was embarrassing enough, but having to do the celebration too made me genuinely want to crawl into a hole and hide.
But... if I didn't do it, I felt like Ji-woo would scold me.
So I just squeezed my eyes shut and did it.
The embarrassment only lasts a moment, but Ji-woo's nagging can go on for a week...!
"Whew-"
Anyway.
I came back to the field and waited for the match to resume. It suddenly hit me—what is all this, really.
A match in front of so many spectators.
When I went over there and looked more closely, most of them seemed like kids around my age that I might have seen somewhere before. Could they be classmates from school?
I guess they weren't just saying empty words when they said they'd cheer for me.
They actually came all the way to the stadium.
Well, anyway.
At first I was a bit flustered, but once I got into the match, I didn't really feel any pressure from having spectators there.
If anything... it felt like I had more energy?
I really have changed a lot.
-Beep-!
In any case, now is the time to focus on the match.
We scored first within 10 minutes and got the momentum going, but the real test starts now.
"Push up!"
"Stay close! Don't back off!"
After the match resumed.
Looking around the field, I could sense the atmosphere was becoming tense. How should I put it—the expressions on the opposing team's faces had completely changed. Their eyes practically looked like they were shooting fire.
In that moment, it hit me once again that today's match wasn't just any ordinary match, but a rivalry derby.
Even though I had no personal feelings about it, seeing those intense looks made me instinctively feel that I shouldn't back down easily.
If we easily give up the momentum here, it would be worse than if the score had just stayed 0-0. Because the side that equalizes would inevitably gain more momentum.
So now was the time to push back.
"Don't get pushed back!"
"Someone's behind you! Watch out!"
"Crush them!"
Sharp shouts and rough words flew past my ears like bullets from all directions.
The opponents seemed like they wanted to equalize as quickly as possible, and as a result, they started playing rough.
-Thwack-!
"Ow!"
Some guy would come in late and give a little shove even after the pass had already gone,
"Urk!"
And there were guys who charged at people first rather than the ball during aerial duels.
"Referee-!!"
"He used his elbow! His elbow!"
Some of our guys couldn't stand watching anymore and tried to appeal, but today's referee seemed to be quite lenient. He just turned away as if to say this much was acceptable.
Maybe it's because kids here develop faster physically? My understanding was that youth matches are usually very strict about rough play.
Anyway, if that's how the ref calls it, then that's that. Quickly reading the referee's tendencies and adjusting your play accordingly is also a fairly important part of the game.
This is exactly when you need to stay calm.
Because nothing makes an angry opponent angrier than staying calm.
"Play it calm! No need to get drawn in!"
I nodded at the captain's shout—he was thinking the same thing I was—and focused on the situation around me.
Close by: in front of me, behind, left, right.
Broadly: quickly scanning the opponent's side of the field to find weak spots.
The opponents had pushed their line up and were pressing hard from the front. In the process, they were also engaging in pretty rough physical battles, trying to prevent us from easily turning forward.
The problem was, if it was working, it was working.
I could see our players gradually becoming more passive.
For example,
"Take your time!"
Passing back without even checking whether a defender was actually coming from behind, even though the press was late.
"Don't drop back so much!"
The number of times the goalkeeper was handling the ball was increasing due to all the back passes.
We were being pushed back overall.
"..."
What's needed in times like this?
Two things came to mind.
One is to respond with rough play of our own. If we come out even more aggressive, the opponents would have no choice but to flinch.
But this was a bit difficult for me to do.
Part of it is because my physique is on the lighter side, but mostly it's because I just don't want to, personality-wise.
Derby or not, I didn't particularly want to get into an emotional battle with kids I'd just met today for the first time.
We're playing football for our futures, not fighting only for today.
I'm definitely not rationalizing this because I'm scared.
Anyway.
If that's the case, then there's only the other option, which is to receive the ball and somehow turn forward.
The more we retreat because we're scared of their rough charges, the rougher they'll get.
I know this well.
When someone picks on you, the moment you show them you're scared, that's when they become even more vicious. Whether it's people or anything else, it's the same. In the end, you have to face them head-on.
The fact that they're trying to stop us from turning means they're most afraid of us turning and launching quick attacks.
To win the match, you have to do what your opponent fears.
Fortunately, this was something I could do.
"Here!"
I called for the ball while moving down below the half line along the left half space.
The moment our defender holding the ball looked at me, I could see him hesitate.
Probably because of the guy quickly closing in behind me.
"Give it!!"
But I shouted once more, louder, and only then did the pass come my way.
-Tap tap tap-!
I could feel the pressure of the guy charging toward me from behind. If I just stood still and received the ball, I'd get run over.
So instead of waiting for the ball, I ran forward.
Then I stopped the ball by trapping it with the sole of my foot,
-Tap tap-!
And quickly turned to face the guy head-on.
He didn't stop and kept charging.
Rather than focusing on him, I checked the positions of my teammates visible behind him and pre-calculated my next play.
Because shaking off a defender charging in so emotionally isn't that hard.
-Thud-!
He stretched his foot toward the ball.
Such an easy tackle to read.
Which made it easy to avoid.
-Swoosh-
I scraped the ball with the sole of my foot to dodge the tackle,
-Tap tap tap-!
And kicked the ball diagonally with my other foot to slip past.
Then I quickly pulled the ball out and got away from him,
-Thwack-!
And threaded a forward pass before sprinting.
Enzo, the center forward, had already started running toward the box the moment he sensed it was a counter-attack, and Bruno, the left winger, was moving into the center to take my position.
My pass was aimed at Bruno, and I started running toward the left side where Bruno had been.
-Tap tap tap-!
While I ran, Bruno held the ball in the center. He turned his head left and right, looking for options.
I ran as fast as I could along the left touch line so Bruno could make a quick decision.
Just as my speed reached its peak,
-Thwack-!
Bruno threaded through a pass.
Toward the space ahead of me on the left.
The ball started rolling toward the open space, and from now on it was a footrace between me and the opposing fullback.
-Tap tap tap-!
Actually, my top speed isn't that fast. My quick bursts of agility are decent, but I lack the explosive power for long-distance sprints, you could say.
But running alongside the defender, I could feel that this guy wasn't that fast either.
Maybe that's why.
He didn't seem to want a fair footrace.
-Thump-!
I felt an impact on my shoulder.
He'd bumped into me.
It wasn't that hard of a push.
But I was in the middle of an all-out sprint.
Side force makes you vulnerable in that state, and my vision started tilting as I stumbled.
I'm falling...
"Nooo-!"
"Keep runniiiing-!!"
...I can't.
The sounds from the spectator area snapped me back to my senses, and I quickly regained my balance.
I didn't want to look weak and pathetic.
Even if that might be true.
-Tap tap tap-!
I gritted my teeth and ran, pulling even with him again, shoulder to shoulder.
When I caught up, I could feel him glancing at me out of the corner of his eye. Maybe he wanted to knock me away for good this time—he hunched his shoulder.
He was about to hit me harder.
The moment I sensed it, I planted my foot hard against the ground and slowed down.
-Tap tap-!
Does Paper beating rock mean something like this?
The guy who'd thrown a shoulder check at nothing but air stumbled, and I gently brushed past him and started running again.
Now there were no more obstacles.
I glanced inside the box as I charged toward the unclaimed ball,
-Thwump-!
And sent in a ground cross.
A cross aimed at the space between the goalkeeper and defenders. Enzo charged toward it.
Just like in training.
-Shhhh-
Enzo slid, stretching out his leg,
-Thwack-!
And as Enzo and my cross met at a single point,
-Smack-!!
The net rippled.
"Yeahhh!"
"Nice-!!"
The players, including Enzo who'd scored, let out cheers and ran toward me.
Th-they're running toward me so excitedly, it's kind of scary...
"Ack!"
"Nice pass-!!"
"Great turn!"
"Good counter!!"
The players swarmed me all at once, and I couldn't breathe. Multiple hands roughly mussed up my hair.
I felt like a puppy surrounded by kids.
After getting petted like that for a while, this time I got dragged toward the spectator area with arms around my shoulders.
"Yeahhh-!"
"Forza-!!"
The players cheered toward the stands.
I was squeezed in among them, looking at the happy spectators. They all looked even happier than us.
"..."
Watching them, a thought suddenly came to me.
Those people cheer for us, and when we do well, they feel joy. In other words, I can make them happy.
But... what I feel is the opposite.
By watching the people who are happy because of us, I actually gain more energy.
This feeling was quite nice.
It also felt fulfilling.
Being cheered on is truly something to be grateful for.
I hope I can continue to repay that gratitude like this.
Especially the one I'm most grateful to...
Hm?
What's with that smug smile?
ㆍㆍㆍ
"Happy?"
"Huh?"
"I said, are you happy?"
"...About what?"
I looked at Ji-woo as if asking what she meant by that out-of-nowhere question.
But instead of answering, Ji-woo just made a sulky expression.
"Oh, happy that we won the match? Of course I am."
After thinking for a moment and answering cheerfully, this time Ji-woo sighed.
...Why is she being like this?
After a moment, Ji-woo spoke.
"Our Ji-an is pretty popular, huh?"
"Huh?"
"It was absolutely crazy, you know? Every time you touched the ball, the girls were going all 'kyaa kyaa'?"
"...No way."
"It's true. They kept saying you're cute. That you look like an idol. I swear there were hearts coming out of their eyes."
"...Really?"
The girls said that?
For a moment, the corners of my mouth started to rise on their own, but Ji-woo shot me a sharp glare, so I quickly lowered them.
I didn't know why, but I felt like I'd be in big trouble if I smiled.
"Sheesh, you're loving it. Earlier I saw you acting all cool with that celebration and everything."
"No, that was..."
"That was what?"
"I wasn't trying to look cool, I did it for you."
"...Whatever."
This time I was the one looking at Ji-woo.
And then Ji-woo turned her head the other way...
"If you want to laugh, just laugh. Don't let your cheek muscles twitch."
"You wanna die? Are you crazy? Have you lost it? Life getting too comfortable?"
Ji-woo suddenly started hitting me.
Ow, ow.
This was the first time in a while I'd been hit, but it was the exact same force as the old days. But somehow I was laughing even while getting hit, and then Ji-woo burst out laughing too while still hitting me.
"Seriously, Lee Ji-an. So annoying."
We walked along laughing like that without even knowing why, and then I suddenly felt something was off and asked Ji-woo.
"But is that why you were upset?"
"That's why what?"
"I mean, that... you said the girls cheered for me."
"So? Why would that make me upset? Why would I be upset?"
Ji-woo acted incredulous like she couldn't believe it.
"I mean, yeah... you're right. You have no reason to be upset."
"Right. Of course not."
"Anyway, that's nice."
"What is?"
"That the kids cheered for me, it's nice. Especially..."
"Especially what, what? You're happy? Are you happy?"
"Ow, ow, why are you hitting me again."
"Stop grinning like an idiot and focus on football, okay?"
Ow, okay okay, stop hitting me.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay?
It really hurt this time, so I apologized quickly.
But wait, what did I even do wrong?
Sigh... This is hard, so hard...
ㆍㆍㆍ
Sunday, after the match against Bologna.
Today was Monday, and since we only had recovery training, I came home early.
Dad... isn't here.
Did he go out somewhere?
Hmm.
I sat on the couch for a bit, thinking about what to do today.
"Oh, Dad?"
"Oh, hey. You're back?"
The front door opened and Dad came in.
"I thought you went to work?"
"No. I don't have work today. I went to the bank."
"The bank?"
"Yeah. I made a bank account and a card."
A bank account and a card?
When I tilted my head in confusion, Dad said in a pleased voice.
"A bank account for your weekly wage. The deposit came in the day before yesterday. But the amount is quite substantial now, so it doesn't feel right for me to keep managing it all. I thought it would be better for you to manage your own money."
"...Oh."
Dad said that while rummaging through his inside pocket, then took out an actual bankbook and card and handed them to me.
"Manage it well from now on. You need to learn how to handle money yourself too."
"Oh... Okay."
I received the card feeling a bit dazed.
Uh...
What should I do first?