Today's opponent was a team called U.S. Sassuolo Calcio.
Sassuolo was a team in the lower ranks of our group, and I had heard they were a step below us in terms of strength compared to our upper-ranked team.
Perhaps because of that, the match was dominated by our team from the very start.
"Nice, nice!"
"Let's push up!"
To what extent, you ask? It was to the point where the opponents could barely get a touch on the ball.
In terms of possession... probably around 70-30?
Based on that solid dominance, we pressed aggressively as if to score quickly.
It felt like a goal could come at any moment.
'...They're good.'
After watching the first 10 minutes or so, my thought was that our team's players were even better than I had expected.
Honestly, I was a bit surprised.
Of course, I already knew.
That the kids on our team were skilled at playing.
Having been stuck in the reserve group all this time, it was a fact I knew better than anyone.
But what I'm saying is that watching them actually play against another team in a real match made me feel it even more.
After all, I had never watched an actual match like this before.
These kids really were talented players.
For a moment, I wondered if it was even okay for me to be sitting on the bench.
How am I even sitting here?
"..."
The match was going so smoothly that the Manager and the coaches were just sitting comfortably on the bench watching.
The ones making noise were actually the kids cheering enthusiastically.
In the midst of all that, having adjusted to the atmosphere, I began to watch the match more closely.
I didn't know if I would get a chance to step onto the field, but I should be prepared just in case.
I watched the match while mentally picturing how I should play if I were to go in.
'If I go in, it would be in place of Gino...'
I couldn't quite call him a position rival yet.
But since the only spot I could take was Gino's, I observed Gino's play carefully.
Gino was standing out from the start of the match.
'...The spacing is wide. Between their defense and the third line.'
Since Gino was good, it wasn't strange for him to stand out. But from my analysis, the opponents were also contributing to this.
The problem was that their defensive spacing was wide and loose.
Between the last line of defense and the third-line midfielders, that is.
"Go! Gino!"
"Nice-!"
Thanks to that, space kept opening up around Gino, who was positioned somewhere between the front line and the second line.
In wide open space, Gino was like a fish in water.
By the 15th minute of the first half, most of the chances were going to Gino, and he had already taken 4 shots.
"Ah, so close!"
"Shoot more, more!"
When Gino's fourth shot narrowly sailed over the goalpost, the boys expressed their disappointment.
Indeed, in the sport of football, the second-best thing for building momentum is shooting.
With each shot from Gino, the voices on the field and the bench grew louder, and our momentum was rising.
And then, around the 13th minute of the first half.
-Thwack!
"That's it!"
"Forza-!"
When Gino's goal went in—the first-best thing for building momentum—the atmosphere was completely heated.
"Nice...!"
I quietly celebrated too, clenching my fist.
I thought it was a goal at quite a good timing.
Actually... it wasn't purely out of joy that our team scored.
That was part of it, of course.
But honestly, the bigger part was the thought that I might get a chance.
Looking at it coldly, there was only one scenario in which I could be put into the match.
What would that be?
Obviously, our team securing the lead early. Getting so far ahead early on that there would be enough room to give a chance even to someone like me at the very end of the bench.
Honestly, even I think they wouldn't pull Gino and put me in if the match were neck and neck.
If that kind of substitution happened, these kids would probably suspect something about me. Like I had dirt on the manager or something.
Anyway, that's why Gino's early goal was nothing but welcome to me.
Call me selfish if you want.
Ji-woo is probably watching...
"One more goal..."
I was about to cheer toward the field but felt a bit embarrassed and stopped.
Let's just keep it going like this, just like this...
*
When the first half ended and the second half started.
My heart was pounding.
It was a mix of half anticipation and half anxiety.
Our team had finished the first half 3-0.
Having completely dominated Sassuolo in the midfield battle, we hadn't given them anything close to a real chance, showing an overwhelming performance.
With things like this, my anticipation was growing.
At the same time, I was getting more anxious as the remaining time decreased.
No, honestly, Manager-nim.
Isn't this enough to put me in?
It doesn't look like we'll lose the match, and Gino seems pretty tired.
Gino is our team's ace, shouldn't we save him? Hm?
"Um... Coach?"
"Mm?"
"Could I go to the bathroom?"
"Go ahead."
Around the 10-minute mark of the second half, I got so antsy that I did something a bit embarrassing. Thinking that maybe The Manager had forgotten I existed, I went and made my presence known by asking to use the bathroom.
...I really never thought I'd stoop to something like this.
Standing in front of the urinal when I didn't even need to go made me let out a sigh.
But it was okay.
I didn't care at all.
Whether it was because of that or not, my hopes became reality.
It was around the 15-minute mark of the second half.
"Andrea, Fabian, and Ji-an. Warm up."
My name... was called.
It was an instruction to warm up.
After doubting my ears for just a moment, I sprang up and started warming up.
I deliberately ran back and forth in front of The Manager often.
So that he'd want to put me in even if just to get me out of his sight.
*
Actually, the situation wasn't that optimistic.
Andrea was warming up next to me.
Though 15-year-old Andrea was Gino's backup, I had heard he wasn't just a simple backup member.
When 17-year-old Gino moved up to the senior team, Andrea was the player set to inherit his spot.
Because of that, he was guaranteed consistent playing time.
Unlike me, who had been practically abandoned by the team, Andrea was being carefully developed.
With Andrea warming up too, I wondered if the chance would actually come to me.
If I just warmed up and went back without playing, it would look even weirder. Even if Ji-woo didn't know much about football, she would definitely think something was off.
"Hoo, hoo!"
The more anxious I got, the harder I warmed up.
Still, the fact that I was told to warm up too means... maybe there's some consideration for me.
Maybe he'll send me out just to make me work for once.
Since I had done nothing for the past several months while collecting my wages.
Right now, if The Manager said "Work! Lee Ji-an!" I was ready to work like a slave.
That's when it became around the 30-minute mark of the second half.
"...""..."
I spotted movement far away at the bench.
As if sharing some secret, The Manager and Coach were looking our way and whispering something.
It was obviously about who to send in, but whose name was coming up?
Was it Andrea after all?
Or maybe they'd put in defender Fabian instead.
The longer the discussion went on, the more anxious I became.
That short moment felt unbearably long to me, and all kinds of thoughts raced through my mind.
And finally, The Coach stood up from the bench.
Whose name would be called?
Please let it be my name.
Please my name... please my name...
"Ji-an!"
...Huh?
Wait.
Did I mishear...?
"Ji-an, take off your bib and get ready."
"Ah... yes!"
I didn't mishear.
It really... was me.
Before I could even feel happy, I took off my bib.
*
"...You understand what I'm saying, right?"
"..."
"Ji-an?"
"Ah... yes."
When I came to my senses, I was already standing in front of the touch line.
For a moment, I felt so dazed that I wondered why I was standing here.
Why am I here...?
Ah.
Right, I'm coming on as a substitute.
"No need to feel pressure. Just play the way you want. Just play. Understand?"
"I understand."
I nodded at Coach-nim's words.
Maybe because we were already way ahead.
Today's instruction was, as always, just to play however I wanted.
Those words sounded especially comforting right now.
"Hoo-"
I let out a deep breath while waiting for the substitution signal.
This is a real match.
Not just a practice game, but a real match after such a long time.
On top of that, it's a moment where my lies could all be exposed if I'm not careful.
I should obviously be trembling like crazy in this situation...
It's not as bad as I thought.
I even feel eager to get in quickly.
It's probably because of the promise I made with Ji-woo.
The promise that I would score a goal.
I really want to keep that promise.
...Because if I don't, everything will be exposed.
That I'm not a genius.
-Tweet!
The ball went out over the touch line.
At the same time, the referee pointed this way and gave the signal.
And the match briefly stopped.
Gino started walking off with a tired face.
Gino walked up close and held out his hand, and I lightly tapped it.
-Tap tap tap!
And I ran toward the center of the field.
The Second Forward position that had just been Gino's territory was now my territory.
From now on, I play here.
-Tweet!
There's no special treatment for substitutes.
The match resumed immediately, and I had no time to be sentimental about my return, activating my focus right away.
From now on, I needed to pour all my senses and nerves onto the field.
If I were actually a genius, maybe I could get away with it, but I'm just an idiot pretending to be a football genius.
I can't deliver a good performance while letting my mind wander.
I'm not a genius.
Focus.
"Left side!"
"Behind you!"
At the 35-minute mark of the second half, the score was 3-0.
All goals had come in the first half, and there hadn't been any real decisive moments in the second half.
From outside, the match probably looked quite loose, but the feeling inside was completely different.
The field was still a battlefield.
Even a simple passing exchange felt like passing around a bomb, and the opponents rushing to steal the ball felt like predators.
It had been a while, but the field was still a scary place.
But right now... I was hungry too.
-Tap tap tap!
We were circulating the ball from the back.
I moved down along the left half space.
Seeing my movement, our central midfielder Domenico moved toward me.
It felt like we were approaching each other.
Each of us had a marker attached.
At first glance, it looked like our paths were tangling in a strange way, but.
This was a play we had already agreed on during training.
The moment Domenico and I overlapped, our team's ball progression would begin.
"Hey!"
-Whooosh!
A pass came in.
A direction that was ambiguous—was it heading toward Domenico or toward me?
But Domenico ran toward the front without hesitation, and I was the one who moved toward the pass.
That movement created confusion for the markers who had been on us.
Should they keep following the person they were marking, or switch markers and hold their positions?
I could feel the two of them hesitating and faltering.
I didn't miss that brief opening and drove into it.
-Whoosh-
As if letting the ball slip away, I nudged it with the outside of my foot just to slightly change its direction.
And then,
I immediately turned and started dribbling.
Through the space Domenico had created, I pushed up along the left half space.
This was a team that had been easily exposing the space between their defensive line and the third line from the start.
Now, with two midfielders momentarily taken out of the equation.
I could see the space.
Moving the ball diagonally from left to center, I started to adjust my tempo slightly.
Meaning I slowed down a bit while scattering my gaze left and right, and to the opponents' eyes, it must have looked like I was about to thread a pass.
I could see the defenders backing off.
That was welcome for me.
The moment I reached near the penalty arc.
I pushed the ball out long with the outside of my right foot, then took a deep breath and charged toward the ball with long strides.
-Thump!
A feeling both heavy and crisp traveled up through my right foot. I struck the shot with all my weight behind it.
That shot,
-Whoooosh-
Sliced through the penalty box...
-Thwack!!
And shook the back of the net.
In that moment, the simulation I had been running only in my head for the past 80 minutes became reality.
Honestly speaking, it went so exactly according to plan that I felt dazed.