Instead of answering my obvious taunt, the figure started to form hand seals, so I held up my hand in surrender and spoke, "No need for a fight. I'm here to meet the leaders of Akatsuki for a business proposal. Plus, I've heard rumors that one of their leaders is an Uzumaki like me. I'd like to find out if that's true."
The hands stopped moving and the figure gestured for me to follow. Thanks to my Mind's Eye of Kagura I was sure I was looking at one of the Paths of Pain. Those chakra rods were very easy to feel in my perception.
Eventually, I was brought before one of my 'targets' - a young Konan. One of the many reasons I never bothered coming here earlier was the fact that the 'Three Saints of Ame' were barely a year or two older than me. Laying low in Kiri meant I couldn't play house with those three no matter how much I wanted to. It was too bothersome anyway, if I didn't want to defect.
"You suspect one of us to be from the Uzumaki clan?" The blue-haired kunoichi asked with a guarded expression.
"Yeah, Nagato. He has red hair just like me, no?" I asked, trying to appear as non-threatening as possible. Of all the people in this world, I didn't want this particular faction to be wary of my strength. It would be better if Kaguya was freed in this generation for the rest of the world and our future.
If Zetsu's plan failed, who knew what that parasite would get up to in its rage? Being the only one left alive after the White Zetsu army slowly annihilated everyone was not something I cared to live through.
"He… does. Why have you come, Red Demon?"
"Please, call me Yo-kun." Her glare remained flat. "Well, first off, I'm offering your group a generous long-term mission that I hope Nagato-san of all people will be pleased to take. After the destruction of Uzu, our people have been hunted, enslaved and forced to live in fear and hiding. Recently, I have freed two such enslaved individuals in Kusagakure and they have been living in my clan since then. Little Karin wants to become a medi nin soon. Her mother watches over the other children I rescued over the years with my attendants," I proposed with a friendly smile. "I'd like to offer you three-hundred fifty high-quality ration pills and five-hundred thousand ryu for every single Uzumaki clan member you find and bring to me on the premise that they wish to relocate to a safe haven."
Konan regarded me with narrowed eyes for quite some time. Eventually, she asked, "You want to trade your 'clansmen' like cattle?"
By the way she spat the word clansmen, it was clear she didn't approve of my methods and I could only smile wryly and shrug, "I am just one person. I cannot roam the world freely to look for others. And I can't just let Akatsuki work for free, can I? It's why I'm offering you so many of my food pills. A single one can last a chunin two days… I'm guessing food is one of the biggest problems Amegakure is facing?"
Konan stiffly nodded, though she quickly schooled her emotions.
"So you accept? We can talk about how many pills or much money you'd rather want. And rest assured, I won't allow Kiri to exploit the Uzumaki people. Mei will never be able to abuse her authority for as long as I live," I offered and for good measure explained to Konan how many children I had rescued despite the Fourth Mizukage's orders for me to wipe out so many clans.
Akatsuki might have already known about that because it wasn't exactly a secret, but I still explained it in great detail.
From beginning to end, I wasn't allowed to see Nagato. It was too bad, I kind of wanted to see the legendary Rinnegan for myself. The Pain puppet I saw earlier sadly had its hood up. At least I could now be sure how his chakra felt because I could clearly feel someone else with those same chakra rods as the puppet lurk around.
Just as I gave Konan a map marked with where she could find a way to contact me to hand over the Uzumaki clansmen in the Land of Water, I casually asked, "Do you want my help to kill Hanzo? I'm largely immune to poison so I don't really fear his status as a demigod or his jutsus."
Konan quickly shook her head and denied, "There is no need. Hanzo's death is coming."
Yeah, I knew that. Which was why I bothered coming here now. After all, Hanzo dared to lead the Akatsuki leadership into a trap by his and Danzō's design and forced Yahiko to take his own life so that Konan would be spared only weeks before.
"I understand."
Still, I took out a sealing scroll and threw it over to Konan.
"You will find detoxifying pills in the brown bottles. I guarantee with absolute certainty that they are effective against Hanzo's various poisons. You and Nagato can take the pills in the black bottle if you ever come to trust me. They will make you stronger," I explained and muttered with a shake of my head, "Too bad that Kakuzu isn't in Ame…"
Those pills would help Nagato's body for a short while as it gets drained of its vitality by the Rinnegan – something I hoped would make them come to me to ask for more of these pills. They were purposefully not helping the problem permanently, something I'd never offer to Nagato in the first place unless I knew he was on my side.
[POV 1st person Konan]
Watching the Red Demon of Kiri leisurely walk away, I furrowed my brows deeply in thought. He was nice. Too nice.
"Will we truly accept his mission?" Nagato suddenly asked from behind me.
Looking back, I saw him leaning against a tree in exhaustion. His body has been deteriorating more and more recently as he began to train in the use of his godly eyes and creating his 'Pain' puppets. It was very worrying…
"A single Uzumaki clansman would give us ration pills to feed two ninja for a year if we believe his words. And then there's still the money," I answered, fighting every urge to walk over and give Nagato a shoulder to lean on.
"But will he mistreat the Uzumaki?" Nagato whispered as he looked in the direction Terumi Yoshihiro had taken. He was using his Rain Sensory jutsu that he learned from Yahiko to pinpoint the Red Demon's position.
"There would be no need to pay us this much if all he wanted to do was use them as experimental subjects or kill them. The scattered Uzumaki are too weak to give someone like him any fight."
Nagato slowly nodded with a nostalgic look in his eyes. He probably thought that someone like Yoshihiro could give these Uzumaki a better life for now than we could.
"I wonder how he knew about me," Nagato suddenly pondered out loud.
Looking at his striking hair, I gained a wry smile and proposed, "If he's looking for 'his' clansmen, it shouldn't come as a surprise that he heard of a powerful ninja with red hair in Ame and put two and two together."
"I suppose," he agreed with a nod before he turned to me. "Show me those pills."
I unsealed the large scroll and immediately fumbled to catch a dozen bottles after opening the seal. One of them broke, and the fresh smell of medicine wafted in the air.
Gaining a sheepish grin, I quipped, "Well, they smell healthy?"
With a short, fond smile for me, Nagato picked up one of the pills that rolled closest to him. He regarded it closely and even crushed it with his hands for a full investigation.
"These are different from our ration pills," he commented as he cautiously put some of the crushed pill dust on his tongue. "Tastes better, too."
I had to stifle a laugh but quickly stopped. Sticking out my tongue for Nagato, I looked back at the scroll. It wasn't all sealing marks, the demon had something written, too.
"'I was already quite sure that Nagato was indeed an Uzumaki clansman. And though he doesn't have to turn himself over, let me extend these pills as a gesture of good will among fellow Uzumaki. From what little I have heard of the state of your faction and country, I am certain you will need all the help you can get – even if you likely already turned down getting my help in a fight, Yo-kun,'" I read out loud with a weirded out expression. "What a schemer."
"He is quite sure of himself… but he better be with that reputation and status," Nagato mumbled under his breath.
"Are we sure he doesn't just want us addicted to these pills in the worst case or indebted to him in the best case scenario?" I cautiously asked.
Nagato shook his head.
"He hid his strength, but it didn't escape these eyes. He's stronger than the both of us, stronger than Hanzo. I have no doubt he could have started a fight right here and walked away unscathed," Nagato dryly stated. "When did he say he will come back?"
I looked on in surprise before I shook my head and explained, "He is on his way to a diplomatic mission in Konoha. After that, we are supposed to find him in the capital of the Land of Iron."
"Iron?"
"We 'would know when we get there'. Are you coming with me? I could go alone?"
Nagato shook his head with a pondering look. With a sigh, he added, "I cannot be certain yet."
"What will 'Uchiha Madara' think?"
Nagato didn't answer my question.
—————
[POV 3rd person]
"State your business," a Konoha guard shouted once I came closer to the main gate of the imposing village.
"Diplomatic envoy of Kirigakure regarding alliance talks," I answered and casually tossed the shinobi a scroll. "Bring this to your kage, I will wait outside of the village to not cause you any trouble."
Dozens of people either gaining entry or leaving Konoha were looking at me. Most of the ninja had a vague recollection of who I was, the rest looked at me weirdly.
I knew why, too. My long red hair was lazily flowing to the sides instead of being bound with care. I wasn't wearing sandals, instead I was running around barefoot. And my red haori was carelessly bound, revealing most of my bare chest and the shorts I was wearing instead of proper pants. It was the height of summer and it was a hot day. I was dressed with that heat in mind.
At least nobody suspected me to be a beggar because of the high quality of my clothes and my otherwise spotless appearance.
*Are you sure about this, Yo-kun?*
'I want to see her despair a little. She dared to reveal the secret of my pills to her corrupt village elders,' I answered Saiken in my mind.
*Still, that is a cruel way to do it,* Saiken rebuked with an exasperated huff in her voice.
I shook my head a little.
'Ever since I managed to create the living flame chakra, I was nearing your father's strength day after day. Now that I can form small seeds of sage chakra without turning to stone, I'm one technique away from being more destructive than Hashirama at his peak if we consider single jutsu,' I argued inwardly without showing anything on my face as I waited for the wretched Third Hokage to answer my summons. 'I will not take this insult lying down.'
All I heard in return was a soft sigh in my mind.
"Terumi-sama, Hokage-sama asked me to guide you to his tower," an ANBU suddenly proclaimed as he appeared before me with a Body Flicker. The same ANBU who led the team who stopped me from learning from En No Gyoja.
"Long time no see, ANBU-san," I greeted as I lazily stood up from my seated position on a rock lining the road. "Care to give me a name this time?"
"Haru," he answered as he gave me his codename.
As we walked side by side, I decided to mess with him and exaggeratedly sniffed the air.
"You smell like an Inuzuka," I pointed out with 'mock' certainty.
The shinobi didn't answer, but I could feel his annoyance through my mind's eye.
"How's Shisui? Did he survive the trip back to Konoha while injured or did Root take him out?"
"Uchiha Shisui is alive and well," the ANBU answered in an indifferent tone of voice to discourage me from further 'slandering' Konoha.
"How generous of Danzō," I muttered as we neared the Kage tower of Konoha.
Sarutobi Hiruzen, two of his old team members acting as his advisors and Jiraiya were standing at his side.
Most of the people were tense as I walked closer, after all: my reputation outside of Kirigakure was terrible. And that was saying something because the image the older Kiri population had of me was horrendous, too. Only a select few of the old guard no longer thought of me as the Fourth Mizukage's coldblooded executioner.
"Terumi Yoshihiro. Your Mizukage announced your arrival several days ago. I hope you didn't face any misfortune on your travels?" The Hokage greeted with a solemn frown.
Hehe, the last time they couldn't account for my whereabouts and sent a special team to look for me, I almost killed one of their most talented ANBU with a casual throw. It was clear why he didn't smile while greeting me.
"I took a small detour to appreciate the beauty of the world. It's important to take breaks from work from time to time," I replied casually.
Old lady Utatane Koharu held a fan in front of her face and quipped to Mitokado Homura in a low voice, "The way he dresses for a diplomatic mission, I have trouble seeing how he ever worked a day in his life."
"Avoiding hard work is also hard work, Koharu-san," I mockingly interjected and the Konoha delegation looked at me in surprise. Not even Jiraiya standing next to his teacher had heard what the two council members had whispered.
Utatane Koharu had the decency to blush, but mostly out of anger for getting called out I quickly felt through my mind's eye. Before she could bluster her way through an excuse or rebuke, Hiruzen held up his hand to silence her.
He looked at me deeply and said, "I hope you have come here in good faith. There is no need to waste our time on frivolous talks that lead nowhere."
I shrugged and countered, "My fiancée did entrust me to come back with a successful alliance. It all depends on Konoha's sincerity. After all, my marriage might get cancelled if it is my fault the talks fall through."
Jiraiya lifted an eyebrow, more than any of the others, and asked, "You're whipped enough to be an errand boy and your wife-to-be holds your future happiness over your head in case you fail? What a cold-hearted shrew!"
Hiruzen had his eyes twitch a little as his student insulted the kage of another village as a shrew but held his tongue. Instead, he gestured for the group to make their way into a meeting room at the Kage Tower.
Feeling no outrageous amounts of hostility from anyone other than the old fart I caught badmouthing me, I followed them. Walking up to Jiraiya who purposefully stayed at the end of the group, I asked, "Is Senju Tsunade going to be at the meeting? I asked for her presence."
The white-haired man with the 'Oil' headband looked at me with narrowed eyes before he shook his head, "Tsunade has not answered the summons yet."
"Hmm, guilty conscience, eh?"
The Sannin didn't know how to answer that and remained silent.
Inside the conference room, I gave Konoha my demands and denied the existence of the superior pills they somehow came to know about. I knew of course that it was Tsunade, but she wasn't here. I couldn't drag her down.
When the Konoha group finally noticed that I wouldn't give any commitments today, they allowed for Jiraiya to take me to the hotsprings of Konoha, a giant tourist attraction in this village.
"I thought you said you wanted to take this seriously for your marriage's sake," Jiraiya said as we moved through the crowds of Konoha's most bustling streets.
"Have you seen Terumi Mei?" I asked while dodging the question.
Jiraiya thoughtfully nodded and held his hands in front of his chest until he eventually stopped… accurately depicting how huge my fiancée's assets were.
"I do have an impression of her," he added with a sagely tone of voice. "I attended the chunin exams in Iwa."
I didn't comment on him knowing how big Mei's tits were, but he gave me another shifty eye and I scoffed before asking, "You're interested in my teaching methods after learning I am the headmaster of Kiri's academy now?"
"That Haku boy must be a once-a-generation genius, but even geniuses need nurturing. Clearly whatever you have done must be working. All twelve Kiri genin showed tremendous skill and not just in chakra control and elemental jutsu," Jiraiya curiously inquired as he paid for our entry into the bathhouse.
Him paying must be a ploy to get me to talk more easily.
"I hope you're not implying my teacher or I created outlandish pills that raised their chakra reserves, control, and talent. I just have clones teaching these kids specifically in small groups or with outliers like the genin you saw even in one-on-one sessions," I dismissed with a small shrug. "Having a kage-level ninja teach them shows much better results than allowing mediocre chunin to do it."
A lie and a truth, I hoped Jiraiya would change the subject because there was no way I would admit to anything.
"That must be exhausting! May I ask if you're using Konoha's Shadow Clone to achieve that?"
I rolled my eyes a little and answered, "Water and fire clones."
A half-truth because my kekkei tota flame clones were made from a bloodline ability made of water and fire… and yin chakra. I'd just never tell Jiraiya that those clones were only useful for teaching the whole student body of the academy alone because their thoughts were connected to me and most importantly each other. And they only shared important pieces of information instead of everything like exhaustion and pain like shadow clones once their chakra was exhausted.
That clone or rather corporeal apparition technique was one of my masterpieces. It might not be the strongest jutsu in my arsenal, but absolutely one of the most useful.
"I see, I see," Jiraiya thoughtfully mumbled.
Once we were undressed and making our way to the waters, I noticed Jiraiya's lust flare up briefly when we heard a few women making noises but he thankfully held it in.
But I also noticed how the Sannin imprinted my perfectly sculpted body into his mind, especially looking at where the scar inflicted by Shisui used to be on my stomach and side. It was as if he tried to will the sealing jutsu used for Saiken into existence just by staring while looking for the wound I had suffered.
"You don't look impressed," the white-haired shinobi said as we finally relaxed against some hot stones. "This is one of the finest hot springs in the Elemental Nations. I should know, I traveled the world to find them all."
"Are you aware of my lava kekkei genkai and my sealing jutsu prowess?"
The Sannin nodded immediately and it looked like he wanted to ask for more of my 'talents', but he held back.
"Then I'm sorry to say that you have not enjoyed the best hot spring on this planet. I should know, I made it myself and I only open it for me and my… attendants."
"A personal hot spring? How luxurious," Jiraiya wondered with a lost look, likely imagining having his own hot spring just for his own 'attendants' like I had.
"Yeah, not far from the mansion on Terumi clan territory. Lava chakra ensures a nice hot soak year round," I answered noncommittally with my eyes closed – though my finest hot spring was part of my plant dimension and its water was made of Takigakure's hero water.
There was no need for Konoha to know about that, though.