I reply by saying "yea, that's fine. I can show you around." The moment the words leave my mouth, Hana's entire being seems to transform.
Her eyes widen and seem to glisten, tears in her eyes or glowing due to sunlight, I can't tell. Her shoulders are now lax and her hands are loose. She is smiling. "Really? You mean it? You'll show me?"
"Yes." I say again. "So tomorrow then?" She tilts her head and a strand of her blond hair falls across her face. "I'll come right after class. I won't be late. I should go. But I'll see you tomorrow." She finally stands, picking up her book. She isn't hugging it to her chest anymore. She walks towards the door, but pauses at the threshold, looking back over her shoulder. And then she walks away. I can hear her footsteps fade out.
I put my hand over my heart to check it, it's beating normally somehow. "I need to inform the president about this."
The next morning, I find Yuki in the literature club room before classes begin. She's arranging the shelves, a clipboard stuck under her arm, her brow furrowed in concentration. She looks at me as I enter, her head is slightly tilted downwards because she's taller than me. I am taller than Hana and bit shorter than Yuki, I am about Yuki's shoulder height.
"Kurosawa, you're early." She sets down a stack of books, puts the clipboard on the table, and then crosses her arms. "What's going on? It seems something is bugging you."
I take a breath and tell her, "Hana Shirakawa. She wants to join the club. And also she 100% has a crush on me and is a bit weird." She looks up and closes her eyes, trying to remember her. She then opens her eyes and sighs.
"Shirakawa," she repeats to herself. "She's in your class, right? Quiet girl, blond hair, always reading." She walks over to the table and sits down, gesturing for me to do the same. She taps the clipboard with her pen. Her expression is thoughtful now, and she is bit serious.
"I've noticed her hovering around the hallway sometimes." Yuki admits, "She never came in. Just stood there. Watching through the window in the door. I thought since she is shy she was waiting for the club to be empty so she could read books."
I feel as if something knots in my stomach as I hear these words. She continues her talking. "A crush, are you sure about that? Or is it just a feeling?" She leans back in her chair, studying me with an expression that's hard to read. "And also, define weird, Kurosawa... what exactly do you mean?"
I say, "I am sure about the crush. She said she watches me. That falls on borderline stalking."
Yuki's pen stops moving against her clipboard. For a long moment, she doesn't say anything. Her expression remains calm, but I have known her long enough to notice the subtle shift—the slight tightening of her jaw, the way her fingers curl just a little tighter around the pen.
"She told you she watches you?" Yuki repeats, her voice measured."Directly? those words?"She sets her clipboard down, leans forward slightly, her elbows on the table. Behind her glasses, her dark eyes are sharp and focused. "Let me be clear about what you're telling me, Kurosawa. She said she watches you. She's been hovering outside this room. She approached you the moment I left. And now she wants to join because of you?"
I reply, "Yes, you are correct." Yuki's lips press into a thin line. She glances towards the door, then back at me. "You said she's weird. How weird are we talking? The kind of weird that makes you uncomfortable? Or the kind where you're not sure yet?" She pulls notebook from her bag—a small, worn one she uses for club activities. She doesn't open it yet, just holds it in her hands.
"I'm not going to ban her from joining just because she has a crush," Yuki says slowly. "Half the romantic literature we read is about obsessive devotion. I'd be a hypocrite if I don't allow her to join because of a crush."
She pauses, meeting my eyes directly.
"But if you're telling me she makes you uncomfortable, if there's a line being crossed then that's different. I'm the president. This is my club. And you're the only member." I felt good when she said those words. She taps her fingers against the notebook.
"So I need you to tell me straight. Do you want her in this club, Kurosawa? Or do you want me to handle it?"
I say "I am a bit uncomfortable, but it's not like she stalks me outside of school. She said she watches me. I guess that's normal crush behavior? I don't know. I think she may be normal once she joins the club."
Yuki listens carefully, her expression softening as I speak. She nods slowly, writes something in her notebook.
"Normal crush behavior," she repeats and then sets the pen down and leans back in her chair, looking up, thinking about the situation.
"Maybe it's normal. I don't know her. You do. Or at least, you're in the same class."
"Here's what I'll do," Yuki says, turning her head back to face me. "I'll let her join. On one condition - she goes through the proper process. She talks to me first. Fills out the club registration form. I will show her around, not you."
I think about Hana and my promise to show her around, and as I was about to open my mouth to speak, she holds up a hand before I could say anything.
"it's not because I don't trust you. It's because if she's already fixated on you, having you be her guide, her contact, her reason for being here, then that's just adding fuel to the fire. She needs to see this club as a place, not as a way to get closer to you."
I nod and reply "Yea, that's fair. I understand."
"Good." As she says this, she pulls out the registration form from her notebook and slides it across the table.
"When she comes today, I'll handle the introduction. She can join. She can read with us. Talk about books. Be a normal member," Yuki adjusts her glasses. "And if she's not normal, if she crosses a line or makes you uncomfortable, you tell me immediately."
She looks at me with quiet seriousness.
"Yea I will. I already did tell you about her, that's why we are having this discussion. So you can count on me." My words seem to reassure her.
She then glances at the clock on the wall.
"First bell's about to ring. We should head to class." She then closes her notebook and stands. I also stand and then I say "Yea, class will start soon. And Aizawa, I think we should exchange contacts. What do you think?"
"Oh yes, that's a good idea." She replies. She then waits, pen in her hand, waiting for me to give my contact number. There's silence for a bit and then I say, "Oh, I don't call myself so I don't know my number. You gotta give me your number instead." I say this with a deadpan face.
Yuki blinks at me. Then slowly a smile spreads across her face - not her usual businesslike expression. She is amused.
"Kurosawa, you don't know your own number?" There's no judgment in her voice. She seems charmed by the admission.
She comes towards me and looks down at me and then takes my left hand and writes her number in my palm.
"Alright, here's my number. Text me when you get home."
She then goes towards the doorway and slides open the door. As she does that, she says, "You know, most people at least memorize their own number." I can't see her face but I bet she's smiling. "But I suppose that's what club presidents are for. Remembering the important details." And then she walks away.
I then look at my left hand palm and at the number it's upside down. I laugh a bit. It's upside down because she wrote it while she stood in front of me. I then position my left hand upside down to properly read the number. "I got her number." That's what I think as I walk towards my class.