She didn't. It was impossible to lie in the face of the desire that had brought them both to this bed. "I'm not sure it's ever that simple," she said ruefully. "There are always…other considerations."
"We're both adults," he argued with arrogant confidence. "We don't have to answer to anyone except ourselves for what we do." He grinned again. "And don't tell me this wasn't good. It was great! No reason to beat yourself up about it."
He was right, Susan thought. It was great, but she still felt like she'd done something wrong. Like she'd betrayed her brother… And herself somehow. But she didn't want to think about it right now. She didn't want to ruin the moment. Maybe she could let herself be selfish today. She refused to think about anything else… She could do that tomorrow.
All she knew was that right now, she was satisfied, sated and too tired to think. She was still in Leo's arms and he was holding her so close and so tenderly that all she wanted to do was remain there. It was weird how safe she felt… In the arms of this dangerous man she'd once feared. Slowly her eyes began to close, and soon she was fast asleep.
Leo lay there, and soon he could tell by her breathing that she'd fallen asleep. In a quick lithe movement he was off the bed and was scooping up his clothes and putting them on. He took one last look at her before he left. Her naked body was sprawled on the bed and her hair was scattered on the pillow. It was such a beautiful sight and for a second he was tempted to get into bed with her and do it all over again.
But he didn't. He looked away, and headed for the door, then he closed it softly behind him.
___________
Susan pushed her food around on her plate, absently stirring her pasta without any real appetite. It had been a week since that night — the night Leo left without a word. She hadn't realized she'd expected him to stay until the hollow ache of an empty bed greeted her in the morning. Now, the silence between them was like an unwelcome guest she couldn't ignore. He hadn't called, hadn't texted, hadn't reached out in any way. Not that she thought he would, she reminded herself, stabbing at a piece of pasta. This wasn't supposed to be complicated.
"So… are you going to tell me about the tall, dark, and ridiculously handsome stranger from your birthday?" Caroline asked, pulling Susan out of her thoughts.
Susan hesitated, her cheeks warming under Caroline's expectant look. "Ugh. I was hoping you wouldn't bring it up," she said.
Caroline rolled her eyes, "I thought you knew me better than that, Suzy. It's me… Caroline, and I never mind my business. So spill."
Susan shook her head, "It's… complicated."
"Complicated how?" Caroline leaned in, curiosity gleaming in her eyes. "You said he's not your boyfriend, but he was definitely giving off some major 'more than friends' energy."
"It's not like that," Susan murmured, taking a sip of her water. She wasn't even sure what it was herself. "Leo and I, we… we met through some business. Nothing romantic."
Caroline raised an eyebrow, smirking. "Sure didn't look like 'business' to me. Now I understand why you were feeling the thing with Jeremy. How could you? When you have that big hulk of a man digging around in your brain."
Susan's face burned, and she let out a sigh. "Okay, we… we had a moment. After the party, he stayed, and…" Her voice trailed off, words failing as she remembered the way his hands felt on her, the way he'd kissed her. Made love to her. The way his touch lingered long after he'd left. She forced herself back to reality. "But when I woke up, he was gone. No note, no message. Just… nothing."
Caroline's expression softened. "Ouch. I can see why you're upset."
"I mean, it's stupid, right?" Susan forced a small laugh, hoping it sounded lighthearted. "It was just one night. I didn't expect anything to come out of it. We aren't… dating, or whatever. But the way he left, and then nothing for a whole week, it just… I don't know why, but it hurt." She looked down, embarrassed to admit it out loud.
"Maybe because you felt something," Caroline offered gently. "You know, sometimes we tell ourselves something's casual, but deep down, we want more."
Susan met her friend's eyes. She definitely didn't want more with Leo. A one night stand was all they could be, and even that had crossed a line. Leo wasn't even the kind of man to want more from, "I don't want more from him," she said aloud, but she didn't sound very convincing because Caroline gave her a look.
"Really?" asked Caroline, "And is that why you keep picking at your food and zoning out every five minutes?"
Susan sighed, feeling the weight of that truth. "Maybe. I don't know what I want with Leo. He's… he's intense, and I feel like even if I wanted to, I can never really pin him down, you know? Like he's the kind of guy that would be there one minute, but then gone the next. I don't even know what he'd want with someone like me."
"Someone like you?" Caroline looked genuinely puzzled. "Susan, you're amazing. Any guy would be lucky to have you. Including him."
Susan laughed weakly. "Yeah, but he's not just any guy. He's… I don't know how to explain it. He's magnetic, complicated, and dangerous. It's like, when I'm around him, I can't even think straight. I feel things I haven't felt before. But it's confusing because I don't know where I stand with him — or if I even want to stand anywhere with him."
Caroline nodded, absorbing it all. "But he hasn't reached out since?"
Susan shook her head. "Not a word. And I keep telling myself that's probably for the best, but…" Her voice softened. "I keep thinking about him."
Caroline smiled knowingly. "Sounds like Mr. Mysterious left quite an impression." She squeezed Susan's hand. "Look, I don't know this guy, but if he left you hanging, maybe he's not worth the heartache. And if he is, well, he's going to have to make an effort, or he doesn't deserve you. Simple as that."
"Maybe you're right," Susan murmured, a half-hearted smile playing at her lips. But deep down, she knew that even if Leo did come back into her life, things between them could never be simple.