Deva sat on the edge of the fountain, idly turning a keychain in one hand and tapping a red-and-purple box resting beside him with the other. His eyes met mine for a fleeting second before he looked off into the distance. "Congratulations on finishing the exam," he began. "How was the experience?"
I sat next to him, the rushing water behind us fading into white noise. "Scary. Snakes aren't supposed to be that big," I replied, the image of the massive serpent still fresh in my mind. "I had a panic attack. I wasn't... I wasn't good enough."
"Every human compares their worst to everyone else's best," Deva said, turning to look at me. "Have you heard the term 'Made-Up Demon'?"
"Made-Up Demon?"
"Aion coined the phrase. It refers to something ugly inside of us that we've fabricated—a flaw we spend the rest of our lives trying to hide," Deva explained. "Your made-up demon is the belief that you are 'broken.' Now, you're looking for ways to fix yourself or hide the fact that you aren't whole."
"But it's not made up. I am—"
"Define 'broken.'" Deva's gaze was stern. "Before you label yourself, make sure you truly understand what that label means." He pressed a finger to my chest. "Words have power, Viel. Every label you apply brings its own meaning into existence. So, before you dismiss yourself as a broken robot, tell me... what is broken?"
I paused, looking down at my hands. "I... it means I don't function properly."
"Do you have evidence for that?"
"I couldn't do anything against that snake!"
Deva folded his arms. "You held your own against Sally and Inata during the first part of the exam. You managed to overpower Inata, outsmart Sally, and take down two high-ranking Trailblazers while protecting your friend."
"But they're humans, and that snake was—"
"Trust me, they don't consider a snake a threat."
Wait. Does that mean I actually could have taken that thing on? It was the size of a freight train!
"Even if I could have, it doesn't change the fact that I was a coward," I muttered. "I had a panic attack. Leo said it was a glitch or a malfunction in my code." I let out a long sigh. "I need to be fixed."
"You were designed to mimic human behavior. Panic, anxiety, nervousness—those are all inherently human traits."
"And how is that useful?! Diana took on a monster like it was nothing! Leo handled everything—the camp, the navigation, the fire. I'm just a glorified cooler!"
With a swift motion, Deva produced a piece of paper. I took them and realized it's Diana's answer sheets.
"I don't understand. She did great..." I flipped through her answers, pausing at a section where she had apologized. "Diana... thinks she cheated?"
Deva nodded. "Diana feels like she cheated," he said, folding his arms. "You performed so well that she felt teaming up with you was an unfair advantage. She feel she don't deserve to pass because she had you to rely on."
I narrowed my eyes. That didn't make any sense at all. Diana was the one who decapitated the giant snake! I'd just stood there like a spineless coward—or I would have, if my safeguards hadn't forced me to act.
"You think highly of the people you like," Deva observed. "You've become attached to Diana. You cherish her, and rather than believe she could be wrong, you've decided that you are the one in error. You are afraid to see the flaws in those you care about."
I looked down at the floor. "So, whose fault was it that we messed up?"
Deva sighed softly and shook his head. "That's not the point, but I suppose mere words can't teach you this lesson." He took the papers back and set them aside, then gestured to the box. "In the meantime, congratulations. You are officially a Trailblazer."
I took a closer look at the box. Its design was abstract, depicting rolling plains and stylized trees. I popped the clasp, revealing a thick envelope and a book.
The book's cover seemed to be made of a synthetic material—some kind of blend between fabric, metal, and Kevlar. My name, Viel Paradox, was written across the front in elegant calligraphy. I picked it up and realized... it was empty.
It wasn't just that the pages were blank—there were no pages at all. I wondered if they'd spent so much on the fancy cover that they couldn't afford the paper.
"Paper not included?"
"Everyone has their own preference. Some like parchment, some like lined paper, some prefer canvas," Deva explained.
"So... what's the point of the cover?"
"It is your final legacy," Deva said. "As a Trailblazer, you will learn many things that you may wish to take to the grave. We honor a Trailblazer's memory by destroying everything known about them once they are gone—with the sole exception of what lies within this cover."
I stared at the name on the front. "So... if I leave this empty..."
Deva tapped the name. "Then your name would be the only thing left of you. Viel Paradox."
"And if I were to burn this, too?"
"The moment you are gone, you would be wiped from every official database," Deva replied calmly. "This book is the embodiment of everything you are willing to leave behind. Burning it is a way of saying, 'I do not wish to be remembered.'"
That sounded incredibly depressing. Who would choose that?
I finally pulled out the envelope. "And this?"
"It contains a congratulatory letter from Aion and a style guide for your uniform."
I blinked. "A style guide? You mean I have to make my own?"
Deva tilted his head. "It would be dreadfully boring if we forced everyone to wear the exact same thing, wouldn't it?" he folded his arms. "Plus it builds character and connection between you and your gear,"
Well, excuse me for coming from a world where it was way cheaper to just buy mass-produced slop!
"I'll open it later," I said, tucking the letter and the book cover back into the box before storing it in my compartment. "Is that it?"
"That is all for now." Deva stood up and began to walk away. "Take care of yourself."
"Wait!" I hurried after him. "One more thing. Diana and Leo passed too, right?"
Deva shook his head. "That is not for me to decide. According to Sally and Inata's assessment, they did not show the qualities required to pass. Leo made an unforgivable mistake, and Diana failed to demonstrate the necessary expertise. It was only thanks to you that your group made it back safely."
"An unforgivable mistake?!"
"It is not my place to say." He waved a hand dismissively. "Regardless, I have other matters to attend to."
"What? Wait!" I grabbed his arm. "Don't just leave me here! Now what? What am I supposed to do?"
Deva sighed in slight exasperation. "Aion did warn me about your dependence on rules."
"Huh?"
"You need to be more flexible and independent if you want to be a Courier, Viel," Deva said, folding his arms. "There are no predetermined routes out there—only destinations." He glanced at my torso where I'd stowed the box. "For now, why don't you find somewhere private and read the letter Aion gave you? Then, work on your uniform. Or if you insist on following the rules, go report to Rogan for your first job as a courier,"
"But I know nothing about making clothes! Shouldn't you—ack!"
He flicked my forehead before I could finish. "Don't do that! Come on, I'm literally alone here. What am I supposed to do?"
"Best of luck. You'll need it."
I watched in silence as the man leaped onto the side of a building and scaled it like a superhero. And there I was: an outdated relic, sitting alone on a comfortable sofa without a purpose.
I should go find Diana.