The next morning everyone had their own rhythm.
Dom and Jet had disappeared somewhere before breakfast even ended, loudly announcing plans that nobody had asked about. Fah had found a spot on the beach with a book and a cold drink and looked like he had absolutely no intention of moving for the rest of the day. Chawin had wandered off toward the resort pool.
Which left Duan sitting on the beach with his feet in the sand and nowhere to be.
He looked to his left. Jun was sitting a few metres away from the group on a towel, sketchbook open on his knee, pencil moving slowly. He'd been at it since they came down. The ocean breeze kept lifting the pages and he kept pressing them flat with his palm without looking up.
Duan watched him for a while.
Then he got up and walked over.
Jun didn't look up when he sat down beside him. Didn't say anything either. Duan took that as a reasonable enough invitation and settled into the sand, pulling his knees up.
"Is that for your project?" Duan asked, nodding at the sketchbook.
"No."
"So you sketch for fun."
Jun didn't answer. His pencil kept moving.
Duan leaned over slightly to look. It was the water. The horizon line, the way the light was breaking on the surface. Clean, precise lines that somehow still felt loose and natural.
"That's really good," Duan said.
"Don't lean on me."
Duan straightened up. "Sorry."
They sat quietly for a while. The water came in and pulled back. A group of kids ran past chasing each other down the shoreline. Somewhere behind them Fah had fallen asleep over his book.
"Do you always carry that around?" Duan asked.
"Carry what."
"Your sketchbook."
"Yes."
"Even on holiday."
Jun finally looked up from the page and glanced at him. "Do you always ask this many questions."
"Yes," Duan said simply.
They sat together in the kind of quiet that had stopped feeling uncomfortable somewhere along the way. Jun sketched. Duan watched the water. The breeze came in off the ocean and Duan noticed Jun tilt his face toward it slightly, eyes closing for just a second.
He looked different here. Not different in a way Duan could easily explain. Just easier somehow. Like the beach had quietly taken something off his shoulders that he hadn't even noticed he was carrying.
Duan thought about saying something about that and decided against it.
"Jun."
"Hm."
"Are you having a good time?"
Jun considered this with more seriousness than it probably required. "It's fine."
"High praise," Duan said.
Jun glanced at him and went back to his sketchbook.
Duan turned back to the water and said nothing else. He had learned by now that pushing past a certain point undid whatever small thing had just been built. So he sat with it. Let it be what it was.
The sound of the waves and the scratch of Jun's pencil filled the space between them and Duan felt his eyes grow heavy without meaning to. The sun was warm on his shoulders and the sand was soft and Jun's presence beside him was steady and familiar in a way that felt bigger than two months should allow.
He was asleep before he knew it.
---
Jun finished the horizon line and paused to study the page.
He reached to turn it and his pencil stilled.
Duan had fallen asleep beside him, head drooping slightly, one hand loose in the sand. He hadn't even noticed.
Jun looked at him for a moment. Then looked back at his sketchbook. Then looked at him again.
He had nice features. That was just an objective observation. The kind of thing anyone would notice. His jaw was clean and defined, his lashes unusually long, lifting slightly in the breeze as he slept. His hair was dark and just long enough to curl softly at his shoulders. His lips were slightly parted, a faint natural pink.
Jun's pencil started moving before he made a conscious decision to let it.
He worked slowly, carefully, the way he always worked when something was worth getting right. The line of Duan's jaw first. Then the slope of his nose, straight and pointed. The lashes next, taking their time on the page the same way they took their time in real life. His hair falling loosely around his face.
Jun was so focused on the curve of his lower lip that he didn't hear the footsteps behind him.
"Bon fire's ready. Everyone's gathering."
Jun snapped the sketchbook shut so fast he nearly bent the spine.
Dom stood behind him looking mildly confused.
Jun cleared his throat and stood, tucking the sketchbook firmly under his arm. He walked away from Dom at a pace that suggested the conversation was over before it had started.
Dom watched him go. Looked at the closed sketchbook. Looked at Duan asleep in the sand. Decided he didn't have enough information to know what he'd just walked into and crouched down to shake Duan awake.
"Get up. Bonfire."
---
They had set it up further down the beach, away from the waterline. By the time everyone had gathered the sky had gone a deep orange and the fire was already going strong, throwing warm light across all their faces.
Jet appeared with a crate of drinks and was received like a hero. They cheered and cracked them open and the evening took on a loose easy energy that only happens when people are genuinely happy to be somewhere together.
They played games. Told stories. Teased each other about things from the semester that were funnier now that exams were over. The fire crackled between them and the ocean sat dark and quiet behind it all.
Then Jet, who had clearly had enough to feel confident about it, opened his mouth and started singing.
It lasted approximately eight seconds before everyone within earshot reacted physically. Chawin buried his face in his hands. Dom made a noise like he'd been injured. Fah leaned away from the sound as if distance would help.
"Please," Dom said. "Somebody. Anybody else."
Jet sat back down looking unbothered.
"Duan," Fah said.
"No—"
"Duan can sing," Dom announced to the group with the energy of someone throwing a friend under a bus and enjoying it.
"Dom—"
"He really can. He's just shy about it."
"I'm not shy I just—"
"Duan." Fah looked at him. The look said there was no version of this where he didn't sing.
Duan exhaled. Looked at the fire. Then looked up.
His eyes found Jun's across the flames without planning to.
He started singing.
It was a song he'd had in his head for weeks without fully understanding why. Something slow, unhurried, the kind of melody that didn't need much to carry weight.
*Every time I look at you I don't know what to do with all of this.*
*I've been holding it so long I think my chest forgot what empty felt like.*
*So tell me — what would you do, what would you say*
*If I laid it all down and said I'm not going anywhere.*
His voice was low and warm and it moved through the space around the fire like the heat itself. He wasn't performing. He wasn't showing off. He was just singing the thing that had been sitting in him since a crowded festival night when a stranger got up off the ground and walked away and took something with him without knowing it.
He didn't look away from Jun the entire time.
Jun didn't look away either.
The fire popped quietly between them. Nobody around the circle made a sound.
When the last note settled into the air everyone erupted. Clapping, cheering, Jet hollering something unintelligible. Duan smiled and ducked his head and accepted the chaos around him.
Jun said nothing. He looked at the fire.
A few minutes later he stood and excused himself quietly, stepping away from the circle toward the darker stretch of beach beyond the firelight.
---
Duan gave it two minutes. Then he got up and followed.
He found Jun standing at the edge of the water, shoes off, the tide coming up just past his feet. Duan walked up beside him and held out a bottle of water without a word.
Jun looked at it. Then took it.
"So you don't get dizzy," Duan said.
Jun opened it and drank. They stood there for a while, the sound of the group carrying faintly behind them, the ocean dark and wide ahead.
Duan looked down at Jun's hand hanging loosely at his side.
He reached over carefully and took it. Slid his fingers between Jun's. Jun went still but he didn't pull away.
When Duan spoke his voice was different. Not the usual bright easy warmth. Something quieter underneath it. Something that had been waiting a long time to come out in the right way.
"Don't forget that I'm here," he said. "I know you're not sure yet. I know you have reasons to be careful." He paused. "But do you feel even just a little. Even something small."
Jun didn't answer.
Duan nodded slowly like he'd expected that. "It's okay. You don't have to say anything." He tightened his fingers just slightly around Jun's. "I'm not going anywhere. I just want you to know that. Whatever you're waiting to see from me — I'll show you. I mean every single thing I've said."
The ocean came in around their feet and pulled back.
Jun stood beside him and said nothing. But his hand stayed where it was, fingers still woven between Duan's, and he made no move to leave.
Sometimes silence is its own kind of answer.
Duan looked out at the water and held on.