SF Chapter 69: Leviathan
Another week passed, Chandler had already arrived at Monica's apartment, and the rest were on their way.
"Dani, what are you doing?" Rachel asked, making a slightly amused face as she saw him sprawled across the couch.
He had one leg thrown over the backrest, his head almost hanging off the edge.
Chandler walked closer and said flatly, "Maybe that's how genius works."
Daniel replied in an unusually discouraged voice, "I'm kind of stuck with my writing. I don't know where to go with Juno."
Then he added, "For you to understand, the feeling of being stuck is like having blue balls."
"Wow, that is a bad feeling," Chandler nodded. "Anyway, I'm going to watch TV." He sat down in the armchair and turned it on.
A short time later, Phoebe and Joey showed up, neither bothered by Daniel's strange behavior on the couch.
But soon after, Monica - who had just finished cleaning the bathroom - noticed her cousin's position, grabbed him by the collar, and forced him to sit properly.
She began cleaning every corner of the living room until she pointed to a small paper ball on the table. "Whose little ball of paper is this?"
"Oh, that would be mine," Chandler said, raising his hand.
"See, I wrote a note to myself, then I didn't need it. So I balled it up…" Seeing the look on her face, he froze. "…and now I wish I was dead."
"Wow, looks like Leviathan is coming…" Daniel spoke, making a face that caused the other three to look at him.
He explained, "See, I affectionately call my mom and her sisters the Four Demons."
"Are they that bad?" Joey asked, looking at Monica. "I don't see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly every time they come over."
"That's because, as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong," Monica replied while continuing her neurotic cleaning. "You see, he's the prince."
"Oh, my little 'Harmonica'," Daniel hugged his cousin, using the nickname his uncle used for her.
"...and yet, you still get the best of the four," he pointed out. "Not that it means much."
She stared at him.
"Wanna switch?"
"Nope, thank you," Monica denied, remembering what Aunt Evelyn could be like. Better stay with lesser evil.
"Which one is the worst?" Rachel was curious. She had only met Monica's mother.
"For me, Aunt Beverly. In ten minutes, she would make you cry. She's a psychiatrist with very little emotion."
Daniel added, "You know, before I got closer to my cousin Leonard, he had never celebrated his birthday before. First time was at twenty-six."
"Oh…" Rachel muttered softly.
Chandler chimed in, "Whoa, that makes my mother not so bad."
"Yes, mine either. She was good before she killed herself when I was 13," Phoebe said casually.
There was a very awkward silence.
"Anyway," Monica changed the subject. "Dani, I forgot to tell you. Chandler's mom is also a writer. And a popular one."
He raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to continue.
"Her name is Nora Bing-"
"What?" Daniel exclaimed. "Holy cow, what a coincidence. I met your mom in a bar, Chandler."
Chandler gave a crooked smile. "Do I need to worry she might go to prison?"
"No, don't worry," he replied calmly. "My brother is thirty-eight."
"Wow, that really makes me feel more relieved." Chandler mocked, putting on a proud face, "and at least now I'll know one person on her dating list."
"Cool, we have similar mothers."
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That night, Jack and Judy were sitting on the couch. Monica served some appetizers while Ross poured wine for them.
Daniel was flipping through a few magazines that were on the table.
"Oh. Martha Lugwin's daughter is going to call you," Judy told her daughter.
She then asked, after tasting one of the appetizers, "Mm. What's this curry taste?"
"Curry," Monica replied flatly.
"Mm." Her mother hummed again, with a clear fake approval in her tone, making Monica take a deep breath.
Ross tried to ease the tension. "I think they're great. I really do."
"They are. We served it at the mini premiere here," Daniel nodded. "The executives and actresses liked it. But well, they're kind of used to sophistication," he chuckled.
An awkward silence filled the room, with Judy staring at him.
"What? You can take more, Aunt Judy. I won't eat everything," he offered smiling, as if he hadn't just said something that might have offended her.
Jack, oblivious to what had happened, joined the conversation, patting his son's leg. "You remember the Lugwins? The big one had a thing for you, didn't she?"
"They all had a thing for him," Judy pointed out, with the proud - and delusional - eyes of a mother.
"Oh, Mom," her son muttered.
"I'm sorry," Monica cut in. "Why is this girl going to call me?"
"Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to do something in cooking or food..." Judy paused dismissively. "...or I don't know."
"Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant,
so-"
"No, Mom. I don't have a restaurant. I work in a restaurant," Monica corrected her, making a face.
"Well, they don't have to know that."
"How about we all have dinner?" Ross tried to smooth things over again.
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The five of them were having dinner at the kitchen table.
"What Rachel did to her life..." Judy spoke in disapproval. "We ran into her parents at the club. They were not doing very well."
"And a script reader? Couldn't you get her something better, Daniel?" she added.
Her nephew simply decided to smile at her.
"I'm not going to tell you what they spent on that wedding..." her husband continued, after taking another bite of the lasagna.
"...but $60,000 is a lot of money," he added.
Judy adjusted the cloth napkin on her lap. "Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar," she said out of the corner of her mouth.
This time, Monica grew defensive. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing." Her mother gave her a fake smile. "It's an expression."
"No, it's not."
"Don't listen to your mother," Jack intervened. "You're independent, and you always have been."
He went on, "Even when you were a kid, and you were chubby... and you had no friends, you were just fine. You'd read alone in your room. And your puzzles..."
After eating a little more, her father continued, "Look, there are people, like Ross, who need to shoot for the stars."
He patted his son's shoulder. "With his museum and his papers getting published."
"Other people are satisfied with staying where they are. I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer," he finished.
Monica, who had already kicked her brother under the table once, did it again, making Ross jump to his feet.
He looked at his parents. "Ahem, okay. Look," he paused, "I realize you guys have been wondering… what exactly happened between Carol and me."
"And so, well, here's the deal," he finally revealed. "Carol's a lesbian. She's already seeing another woman. She's pregnant with my child." Ross said it as if he were pulling off Band-Aids.
The parents' eyes widened, until Judy turned to her daughter and asked, "And you knew about this?"
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The group still gathered after the Geller family dinner. Central Perk was basically closing, with only them left in the café.
"Well, Monica, you're always part of the cousins-with-difficult-mothers team. With only Ross being excluded," Daniel said, lightly tapping his cousin's foot as she lay on the couch.
"It's not my fault," Ross defended himself, leaning down to kiss his sister on the forehead.
"Here, this might help your mood, Mon," Dani said, handing over a giant package that had been resting beside the couch.
She frowned at the wrapping. "What is this?" She took it and began unwrapping it.
"My thank-you for all these days of your hospitality," he smiled, "even if my bed was stolen halfway through my stay."
Rachel rolled her eyes and ruffled his hair.
"Oh my God! It's an All-Clad 'Tri-Ply' cookware set!" Monica shouted excitedly.
"Yeah, I have no idea what you're talking about, Mon. To me, it's just shiny pots and pans, but the seller told me that you would love it," her cousin remarked.
"Thank you, Dani," Monica said, hugging him. "We're going to miss you. Our little mascot."
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