"Huh? Report cards?"
Sakuragi froze.
Those were things ordinary people worried about.
A genius only needed basketball...
Teacher Koike pulled a stack of exam papers from the podium.
The bright red scores were blinding.
"Sakuragi."
"Although I hate to crush your confidence, school regulations are merciless."
The corners of Teacher Koike's mouth curled upward into the satisfied smile of a hunter watching his prey fall into a trap.
"Any student who fails more than four subjects..."
"...will lose their eligibility to participate in the National Tournament."
BOOM!
The words struck Sakuragi like a bolt of lightning, splitting his skull wide open.
He petrified.
Cracked.
Then mentally weathered away into dust.
The colour drained from his face in an instant.
His mouth opened wide enough to fit two basketballs.
"...Huh?"
"...HUH?!"
A heart-rending scream echoed throughout the school building.
Even the sparrows on the playground dropped from the sky in fright.
...
The dismissal bell rang, and the corridor immediately filled with students.
Sakuragi's desk had become the school's newest five-star tourist attraction.
Of course, nobody had come to admire a genius.
They had come to pay their respects to the deceased.
"Tsk, tsk..."
"This is tragic."
"Absolutely tragic."
Ohkusu Yuji held up one of the papers as though he were deciphering an alien language.
"Nine points in maths?"
"Hanamichi, were you breakdancing on the exam paper?"
"This one's even better!"
Noma laughed so hard he sounded like a goose.
"Fourteen in English..."
"And that's after guessing 'C' for practically every question."
Takamiya Nozomi crunched on a bag of crisps while delivering the finishing blow.
"And here's a magnificent seven."
"You'd probably score higher by stepping on the answer sheet with your eyes closed."
"Exactly."
"My weight gives me an advantage."
Takamiya nodded solemnly.
Mito Yohei sighed before laying down the final paper.
"Japanese Language..."
"Thirty-six."
"The highest score of the bunch."
Seven exam papers lay neatly spread across the desk.
Every single one covered in brilliant red ink.
A true grand slam...
Just in the opposite direction.
"Hahahaha!"
"Hanamichi, you're really a genius!"
"Getting scores like these means you successfully avoided every correct answer!"
The Sakuragi Army laughed until they were nearly suffocating.
The atmosphere was filled with pure joy.
Meanwhile...
Sakuragi slumped lifelessly in his chair.
His soul had practically left his body.
Only one sentence echoed endlessly inside his head.
"...You won't be allowed to compete in the National Tournament."
No National Tournament...
He'd embarrass himself in front of the entire school...
Especially Haruko-san.
And he'd have to watch that damn fox, Rukawa, steal all the glory.
"...Unforgivable."
His fists clenched so tightly that they crackled.
His face changed from deathly pale...
To liver-red...
Before turning the colour of a freshly boiled crab.
"I am the genius Sakuragi Hanamichi!!"
...
The teachers' office.
The oppressive atmosphere made it hard to breathe.
Several teachers from the core subjects sat with teacups in hand, their sharp gazes fixed upon the row of "criminals" standing before them.
Akagi Takenori...
The iron-willed man who dared challenge even Kainan's emperor, Maki Shinichi—
Was currently bent over at a perfect ninety-degree angle.
He looked like an elementary school student apologising for breaking a window.
"Teachers!"
"I beg you!"
His booming voice carried unmistakable desperation.
"Please show them mercy and give these idiots one more chance!"
"Let them take a make-up exam!"
"I beg you!!"
Behind him stood Shohoku's Four Heavenly Failures, each in their own unique state.
Rukawa Kaede was somehow asleep while standing upright, his head bobbing every few seconds.
Miyagi Ryota was drenched in sweat, his eyes darting everywhere except at the teachers.
Mitsui Hisashi stood with both hands in his pockets, trying to look cool.
Unfortunately, his trembling legs had already betrayed him.
As for Sakuragi...
He stared wide-eyed at the person leisurely sipping tea in the teachers' seats.
"Master?!"
His voice nearly cracked.
Makino Juro was calmly drinking tea while chatting and laughing with the teachers.
The difference between him and the group of academic prisoners behind him couldn't have been greater.
"Juro has ranked first in the entire year once again."
The maths teacher smiled so broadly that every wrinkle on his face bloomed.
"Outstanding on the basketball court, and outstanding in academics too."
Makino Juro calmly took another sip of tea.
He glanced sideways at the "problem children."
Then shrugged.
"You're flattering me, Teacher."
"I just happen to look good because of the company I'm keeping."
Pfft!
Miyagi and Mitsui nearly coughed up blood.
A fatal blow.
That was psychological warfare.
He had absolutely done that on purpose.
The teacher tapped the desk and sighed.
"Akagi."
"You're an excellent student."
"Makino Juro is a role model."
"But these four..."
He shook Sakuragi's maths paper.
"The fill-in-the-blank question asked for the formula for the area of a circle."
"He drew a basketball."
"And underneath it he wrote..."
'A genius's touch is the real formula.'
"This is an insult to mathematics!"
Sakuragi proudly puffed out his chest.
"But it's true!"
"I can tell it's a circle the moment I touch it!"
"Enough!"
Akagi spun around so violently that his eyes nearly popped out.
Then he bowed deeply once more.
"I'm terribly sorry, Teachers!"
"I failed to supervise them properly!"
"If you give them another chance..."
"I'll personally watch them study."
"I swear they'll never hand in exam papers insulting human intelligence like these again!"
For the sake of conquering the nation...
For the sake of taking these idiots onto that stage...
Akagi Takenori was willing to bow until his forehead bled.
"Hey, Gorilla!"
"What are you doing?!"
Sakuragi frowned.
"You don't have to lower yourself for them."
Akagi answered with an iron fist.
Thump!
It landed squarely on Sakuragi's head with a crisp crack.
"Owww!!"
Sakuragi clutched his head and squatted down.
"You idiot!!"
Akagi roared, spraying spit everywhere.
"Who do you think I'm doing this for?!"
His voice echoed throughout the office.
Outside the door, Kogure nervously wiped the sweat from his forehead.
Ayako simply covered her face with one hand.
"What are we supposed to do with these idiots..."
Just as the situation reached a stalemate—
"Hahaha!"
"How embarrassing, Akagi!"
A loud, smug voice rang out from the doorway.
Captain Aota Tatsuhiko of the judo club stood there with both hands on his hips, grinning from ear to ear.
"All four of your starters failed?"
"And you still want to conquer the nation?"
"What a joke!"
"You might as well disband the basketball team."
"Send Sakuragi over to the judo club instead!"
Akagi ground his teeth.
"Aota..."
"What are you doing here?"
"Don't tell me everyone in the judo club passed."
"The only one who failed..."
"...was me!"
He declared it with enough pride to make it sound as though he'd ranked first in the entire school.
Silence.
The entire office froze.
The next second—
Thud!
The previously arrogant Aota Tatsuhiko dropped to his knees with astonishingly smooth precision.
It was a flawless sliding kneel worthy of a professional performance.
His knees polished the floor as he slid straight to the teachers' desk.
He clasped both hands together.
Tears and snot burst forth instantly.
"Teacherrrrr!!"
"Please save me!!"
"The judo club is finished without me!"
"I'm destined to become the National Champion!!"
"Please!"
"Just give me one chance at a make-up exam!!"
The flawless combo of showing off first, then immediately begging on his knees left everyone completely speechless.
Several seconds of silence later—
"Pfft! Hahahahahaha!"
Sakuragi pointed at Aota while laughing so hard tears streamed down his face.
"Hahahaha!"
"So you're an idiot too!"
"You're the only one in your club who failed!"
"Hahahaha!"
Miyagi and Mitsui doubled over with laughter.
Even Juro couldn't stop the corners of his mouth from twitching.
Aota Tatsuhiko...
Really was one of a kind.
Watching the ridiculous scene unfold, Akagi let out a long sigh and pressed a hand against his throbbing temple.
A bunch of utterly hopeless idiots...
...
In the end...
Moved by Akagi's sincerity...
(and Aota's shameless rolling around on the floor)
the teachers finally relented.
"You'll all take the make-up exams tomorrow."
"This is your last chance."
As they stepped out of the teachers' office, the afternoon sunlight flooded the corridor.
Akagi slowly turned around.
His gaze was as sharp as a blade.
"You all heard them."
"Basketball practice is cancelled tonight."
"Every single one of you is coming to my house."
"We're beginning Spartan-style hell training."
"And if anyone dares to run..."
He cracked his knuckles.
Crack. Crack.
The sound alone made everyone's teeth ache.
"I'll kill him."
END OF CHAPTER
The King Of Slacking Off - MrBehringer's Secret
👉 patreon.com/MrBehringer