Sunday morning came in soft and quiet through the broken window and the light was pale and golden and the city was still sleepy and the only sound was the sizzle of eggs in a pan and the soft hum of the small fridge.
Shen Wei was standing at the hot plate with a spatula in his hand and his new blue sweater on because he couldn't help himself and he had been wearing it since he woke up and he didn't care if that was weird.
He was focused on the eggs because Wenhao had complained yesterday that the eggs were too dry and today Shen Wei was determined to make them less dry and he was adding a little bit of milk like his mother used to do and he was feeling proud of himself.
He heard the bathroom door open behind him and he didn't turn around because he was busy with the eggs and also because he was still half asleep and his brain wasn't fully working yet.
"Good morning Weiwei," Wenhao said and his voice was soft and sleepy and a little shy which was not how Wenhao usually sounded because Wenhao usually sounded like he owned the world and everyone in it.
Shen Wei smiled at the pan. "Good morning. I'm making eggs. With milk. So they're not dry. You better appreciate this."
Wenhao didn't say anything back and that was strange because Wenhao always had something to say about everything.
Shen Wei turned around to see why Wenhao had gone quiet and the spatula slipped from his fingers and hit the floor with a soft clatter that he didn't even hear because all the sound had left the world and all the air had left his lungs and all the thoughts had left his brain.
Wenhao was standing in the doorway of the bathroom with his arms slightly away from his body like he didn't quite know what to do with them and his cheeks were pink and his eyes were nervous and he was wearing a skirt.
The skirt was black and simple and it fell just above his knees and it moved slightly when he breathed and his legs were bare and smooth and milky white like cream and they were so slim and so long and so pretty that Shen Wei forgot how to be a person.
Wenhao had a white shirt on top and the shirt was soft and loose and it tucked into the skirt at the front and the whole picture was so soft and so gentle and so beautiful that Shen Wei's heart stopped working for a full three seconds and then started again at a speed that felt dangerous.
Wenhao's legs were the kind of legs that artists would want to paint and photographers would want to capture and poets would want to write about and they looked like they had never walked on rough ground or stood on cold floors or carried anything heavier than a dream.
Shen Wei's mouth was open and his eyes were wide and his hands were frozen in the air where he had dropped the spatula and his heart was beating so fast that he could feel it in his throat and his temples and his fingertips.
Wenhao looked down at himself and then back at Shen Wei and his cheeks got pinker and his voice was small and shy when he spoke. "Weiwei. Say something. You're staring and it's making me nervous."
Shen Wei opened his mouth and closed it and opened it again and the only thing that came out was a small breathy sound that wasn't even a word.
Wenhao shifted his weight from one foot to the other and the skirt swayed with him and the movement was so soft and so natural that Shen Wei's heart somehow beat even faster.
"Does it look bad?" Wenhao asked and his voice cracked a little. "I bought it yesterday. At the mall. When I ran back. It's stupid right. I should take it off. I shouldn't have—"
"No," Shen Wei said and his voice came out rough and loud and he surprised himself with how fast he said it. "No don't. Don't take it off."
Wenhao looked up and his eyes were hopeful and scared and searching for something in Shen Wei's face.
Shen Wei took a step forward and then another step and his legs felt like they belonged to someone else and his heart was doing things that hearts shouldn't do and his hands were shaking.
"You look," Shen Wei started and then he stopped because he didn't have the right words and he didn't know if the right words even existed. "You look.... Wenhao.... You look so... I don't have words for how you look."
Wenhao tilted his head and a strand of his dark hair fell across his forehead. "Is that good or bad?."
Shen Wei laughed and it came out shaky and wet because his eyes were stinging with something that felt like tears but not sad tears. "It's good. It's so good. It's the best. You're the best. You look like someone from a painting. A painting that people would stand in line for hours to see."
Wenhao's whole face lit up like the sun coming out from behind a cloud and he looked down at the skirt and touched the fabric with his fingers and his smile was shy and bright and so beautiful that Shen Wei had to look away for a second because it was too much for his heart to handle.
"I was so scared," Wenhao admitted quietly. "I woke up at six and I just sat on the bathroom floor holding it for an hour before I put it on. I almost didn't come out. I almost changed back into my pajamas and pretended I never bought it."
Shen Wei stepped closer until there was only a small space between them and he could see the tiny freckles on Wenhao's nose that he had never noticed before.
"I'm glad you came out," Shen Wei said softly. "I'm glad you trusted me. I'm glad I'm the one who gets to see you like this."
Wenhao looked up at Shen Wei's face and his eyes were wet and his lip was trembling and he looked so vulnerable and so soft and so different from the loud bossy boy who pushed past people and demanded things and never took no for an answer.
"Weiwei?" Wenhao whispered.
"Yeah."
"Can I have a hug? I really need a hug right now."
Shen Wei opened his arms and Wenhao stepped into them and Shen Wei wrapped his arms around Wenhao's waist and his fingers touched the soft fabric of the skirt and Wenhao's waist was so small and so warm and so perfect under his hands.
Wenhao buried his face in Shen Wei's shoulders and his breath was warm against Shen Wei's sweater and his body was shaking a little and Shen Wei held him tighter and closed his eyes and breathed in the smell of Wenhao's shampoo and Wenhao's skin and Wenhao's everything.
They stood like that for a long time with the eggs getting cold on the hot plate and the sun getting higher in the sky and the city waking up outside the broken window.
Shen Wei's heart was still beating too fast and his hands were still shaking and his mind was still reeling but none of that mattered because Wenhao was in his arms and Wenhao trusted him and that was everything.
Wenhao pulled back first and his eyes were red but he was smiling and the smile was real and big and bright. "The eggs are probably ruined."
Shen Wei laughed and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. "I don't care about the eggs."
Wenhao's smile got even bigger and he looked down at the skirt again and then back at Shen Wei. "Can we eat breakfast like this. Just us. Just here. I don't want to change yet."
Shen Wei nodded and walked to the hot plate and looked at the eggs which were definitely overcooked and dry and terrible but he put them on plates anyway and carried them to the table.
Wenhao sat down on the floor cross legged and the skirt spread out around him like a dark flower and his white legs looked even longer and even smoother in the morning light and Shen Wei almost dropped the plates again.
He sat down across from Wenhao and they ate the terrible eggs and drank the instant coffee and the room was quiet but it was a good quiet and Wenhao kept touching the skirt every few minutes like he couldn't believe it was real.
"Weiwei?"
"Yes."
"Thank you for not making me explain. Thank you for just hugging me. Thank you for not asking a million questions."
Shen Wei smiled into his coffee cup. "I have a million questions. I'm just saving them for later."
Wenhao laughed and the sound was bright and free and nothing like his fake laugh that he used on his father and the servants and the world.
"I love this," Wenhao said quietly and he looked around the small yellow room with the broken window and the water stain on the ceiling and the wardrobe in the corner. "I love this apartment. I love these floors. I love this light. I love that I can wear a skirt here and no one looks at me like I'm wrong."
Shen Wei's heart squeezed and he put his coffee down because his hands were shaking again. "You're not wrong Wenhao and you're free to wear anything you want I would never judge you.
They finished breakfast and Wenhao stayed in the skirt all morning and they did homework together and watched another movie and Shen Wei tried very hard to focus on anything other than Wenhao's legs and he failed completely.
But Wenhao didn't notice that either and that was probably for the best because Shen Wei wasn't ready for Wenhao to know how fast his heart beat when Wenhao was around.
And he didn't know if he would ever be ready.
But for now it was enough to sit on the floor next to his friend and pretend that his heart wasn't writing love letters that his mouth would never send.