[Mitch and Cam's House]
Mitchell stood in the foyer staring at the luggage piled beside the front door.
There were two suitcases for him, four for Cam, one small pink suitcase for Lily, a garment bag, a cooler, three tote bags, and a pet carrier sitting directly in the middle of everything.
Inside the carrier, Larry stared back at him.
Mitchell pointed toward the cat. "I want it officially noted that I voted against bringing the animal."
Lily hugged the carrier protectively. "Larry wants a vacation."
"Larry doesn't know what a vacation is."
Cam swept into the room wearing a wide-brimmed hat and carrying another bag. "Oh, Mitchell, calm down. Cats have a rich, nomadic history. They are deeply intuitive travelers."
Mitchell looked at him. "Based on what?"
Cam stopped.
"Egypt."
Mitchell blinked. "The Ancient Egyptians worshipped them, Cam! They weren't strapping them into a Winnebago for a trip to Sedona!"
Lily opened the carrier.
Mitchell immediately pointed. "Ah, ah! Nope. Absolutely not. Larry remains in lockup until we cross the threshold of the RV."
Larry stepped out anyway.
Cam gasped. "Look at her! She just wants to inspect the luggage manifest."
Mitchell watched the cat casually walk across the luggage and sit on top of his suitcase.
"She's peeing in my shoes before Arizona. I can feel it."
Lily picked Larry up. "She likes you."
"She scratched me yesterday."
"You touched her tail."
"I was moving her tail because it was in my coffee."
Cam crouched beside Lily and adjusted Larry's little blue collar. "Our very first family expedition with our newest little member."
Mitchell sighed. "You realize a few weeks ago we couldn't even get approved for a cat."
Cam's smile became emotional. "And now look at us."
Lily hugged Larry tightly.
"We have Larry."
Mitchell nodded. "Yes. We have Larry."
Lily looked up at him. "Because Haley got two babies and you guys couldn't get one cat."
Mitchell closed his eyes.
Cam's face fell. "Lily, sweetheart, we talked about weaponizing the twins against us."
A horn sounded outside.
Cam immediately brightened. "The motorcoach!"
Lily hurried toward the door carrying Larry.
Mitchell grabbed the carrier. "Why am I carrying the empty cage?"
Cam picked up two suitcases and followed them.
"Because, Mitchell, every modern family needs an anchor of responsibility."
Mitchell stared after him.
"That is the most affectionately wrapped insult you've ever handed me."
...
...
[Jack and Haley's Motorcoach]
Jack was stretched across the master bed near the back of the motorcoach with one arm behind his head, looking entirely too comfortable for someone whose family convoy hadn't even fully assembled yet.
Haley lay beside him, scrolling through her phone. "Okay. Palm Springs dinner reservation is locked. Joshua Tree sunset photo-op is scheduled. Sedona prenatal couple's massage is confirmed. And Austin VIP concert tickets are secured."
Jack glanced toward her. "You've turned our vacation into a military campaign."
Haley kept scrolling. "No, military campaigns have zero shopping."
Jack laughed and reached over, resting a hand against her lower back.
Haley opened another note on her phone. "Also, I made a list of everything I want to do before we get back."
"Should I be scared?"
"Five-star dining, boutique shopping, infinity pools, VIP tents, one obscenely expensive mud bath, and at least two full nights where we deadbolt this door and pretend I'm an orphan."
Jack raised an eyebrow. "Only two?"
Haley finally looked at him.
"Fine. Three."
"Better."
She smiled and rolled onto her side, propping her head against his chest.
"And I want movie nights."
Jack looked down at her. "We have an entire road trip through four states and you want to watch movies?"
"Yes. In a king-size bed. With expensive snacks and cuddling."
"You had me at cuddling."
Haley tapped another item onto her list. "Also, lots of sex."
Jack nodded solemnly. "A vital part of the American road trip experience."
Haley smacked his stomach lightly. "I'm serious. Pretty soon I'm going to be huge, uncomfortable, tired, and probably mad at you because you breathe too loud."
"You're already occasionally mad at me because I breathe too loud."
"Exactly! So we have to maximize this window of opportunity before I become a hormonal monster."
Jack pulled her closer.
Haley rested her phone against his chest and looked around the bedroom. "Honestly... this is kind of perfect."
"Four luxury buses full of your family?"
"No. This part."
She gestured between them.
"Our room. Our bed. Seven days where nobody needs us for anything important."
Jack looked toward the front of the motorcoach.
From somewhere outside came Phil's voice shouting through a walkie-talkie.
"BREAKER, BREAKER! THIS IS BIG DADDY THUNDER TO ALL ROAD FALCONS! RADIO CHECK, OVER!"
Haley closed her eyes.
Jack sighed.
"Seven days where almost nobody needs us."
Haley buried her face against his chest.
"Lock the door. Now."
...
...
[Richard and Sarah's Motorcoach]
Richard and Sarah sat across from each other in the living area of their motorcoach, each holding a glass of wine while the vehicle moved toward their meet point.
Sarah glanced toward the window, then back at him. "I still can't believe he guilt-tripped us into this."
Richard smiled over the rim of his glass. "He learned from the best."
Sarah gave him a look. "Your guilt trips involve financial projections."
"And yours involve saying, 'No, no, it's fine,' until everyone feels like they've disappointed you personally."
She considered that for a moment, then nodded. "Fair."
Jack's argument had been brutally effective. He'd reminded Richard that he hadn't taken a proper vacation in almost two years, pointed out that Sarah had spent most of the summer bouncing between fashion events and meetings, and then finished them both off with something neither could really defend against.
"I mean, I'd really love it if you guys came. I don't remember the last time we actually took a family trip together, and with the twins coming, who knows when we'll get another chance. But hey, no pressure. I know you're both busy. Work's important. I'm sure I'll have plenty of pictures to show you when we get back."
Sarah had started packing almost immediately.
Richard leaned back into the couch. "Kid fights dirty."
"He absolutely does."
"Still worked."
Sarah smiled and took another sip. "Truth be told, I think we needed this."
Richard lifted his glass. "A week without production budgets."
"No launch meetings."
"No conference calls."
He glanced toward her phone on the table. "You brought that."
"So did you."
"Mine is for emergencies."
"Of course it is."
Before Richard could answer, Phil's voice suddenly crackled through the convoy radio.
"BIG DADDY THUNDER TO ALL UNITS! RADIO CHECK!"
Sarah closed her eyes.
Richard slowly sat forward, a grin spreading across his face as he picked up the radio.
Sarah immediately pointed at him. "Don't."
Richard pressed the button. "Big Daddy Thunder, this is Money Train. Reading you loud and clear."
A beat of silence followed.
Then Phil practically screamed through the speaker.
"MONEY TRAIN! WELCOME TO THE ROAD!"
Richard burst out laughing.
Sarah stared at him in disbelief.
He lifted his wine glass toward her. "I'm on vacation."
...And thus, the road trip began...
--
NOTE: The next one will be the final volume. It'll deal mostly with Marriage, pregnancy, and kids. The Hollywood side will be small. Like really small. I'll see you in a week or so. Gotta stock up again.
--
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