Talking with Mary took up most of the day.
By the time evening arrived, I felt like I knew more about Seraphina than I knew about myself.
At least now I understood the kind of person she had been.
Kind.
Bright.
Mischievous.
The sort of person who could walk into a room and make everyone smile.
The exact opposite of me.
I stared out the window as the sky slowly turned orange.
The gardens below were quiet.
Peaceful.
But my thoughts weren't.
Because the more I learned about Seraphina—
The more impossible this situation felt.
I couldn't be her.
No matter how hard I tried.
No matter how much I learned.
No matter how carefully I copied her behavior.
I wasn't Seraphina Ardent.
I was Kim Minji.
A girl who spent most of her life alone.
A girl who never learned how to make friends.
A girl who found conversations exhausting.
A girl who chose death because she couldn't see a future anymore.
How was someone like me supposed to become a beloved noble lady?
My fingers tightened around the book resting in my lap.
Sooner or later, they would notice.
Father.
Mother.
Lucian.
They loved Seraphina.
Not me.
What would happen when they realized the daughter they knew was gone?
The thought made my chest ache.
I lowered my head.
Maybe I should start distancing myself from them.
Not enough to make them worry.
Just enough that it wouldn't hurt so much later.
If they became less attached to me now—
Wouldn't it be easier?
For everyone?
I immediately hated the thought.
But it kept returning.
Again and again.
Like a bad habit.
Maybe I should tell them I still needed more rest.
That would give me an excuse to stay alone.
To avoid conversations.
To avoid making mistakes.
To avoid pretending.
I considered it for a few moments before shaking my head.
No.
That would only backfire.
Mother would spend even more time beside me.
Father would summon physicians every day.
Lucian would probably refuse to leave me alone.
If anything, they would become more protective.
Not less.
I sighed.
This family really was troublesome.
Not because they were cruel.
But because they were kind.
And kindness was far more difficult to deal with.
Especially for someone who had never known what to do with it.
I leaned back against the chair and stared at the fading sunlight.
Two weeks until the royal ball.
Two months until the engagement announcement.
One year until Seraphina's death.
The clock was already ticking.
And while everyone else believed I was recovering—
I was running out of time.
By the time dinner arrived, Mother, Father, and Lucian had all returned home.
Just as expected, they insisted I join them.
The dining room felt much livelier than usual.
Mother seemed to be in a particularly good mood.
"I've decided," she announced.
Father immediately looked concerned.
Whenever Mother said those words, everyone became nervous.
"You've decided what?" Lucian asked cautiously.
Mother smiled.
"We're going shopping tomorrow."
Lucian relaxed.
Father did not.
Mother continued.
"The royal ball is only two weeks away. Seraphina still needs her dress."
"Oh."
That explained it.
Father and Lucian already had formal attire prepared.
Noble men's clothing rarely changed.
Women's clothing, however, was apparently a completely different battlefield.
Mother looked toward me.
"We'll spend the day in the capital."
I hesitated.
The capital meant people.
Lots of people.
But after a moment, I nodded.
"I'll go."
Mother studied my face carefully.
"If you don't want to go, it's alright, dear."
"No."
I forced a small smile.
"I want to go."
She seemed relieved.
Yet throughout dinner, I caught her glancing at me every now and then.
As if she was trying to figure something out.
As if she noticed I wasn't quite the same.
Every time our eyes met, she simply smiled.
And somehow—
That made me feel worse.
That night, after everyone returned to their rooms, I lay awake staring at the ceiling.
Tomorrow.
I would spend an entire day with Mother.
Just the two of us.
The thought made me nervous.
Not because of her.
But because I didn't know how daughters were supposed to behave.
At some point, my thoughts became a tangled mess.
Then morning arrived before I ever fell asleep.
Mary entered my room shortly after sunrise.
"My lady, it's time to—"
She stopped.
I was already awake.
Or rather—
Still awake.
Mary stared at me.
I stared back.
Dark circles.
Messy hair.
Sleepy eyes.
I probably looked terrible.
"My lady."
Her voice was unusually calm.
Which somehow felt more dangerous.
"Yes?"
"Did you sleep at all?"
"...Maybe?"
Mary narrowed her eyes.
Wrong answer.
For the next ten minutes, I was forced to listen to a lecture about proper sleeping habits.
Apparently, nearly dying once did not excuse poor sleep schedules.
Who knew?
After her lecture, she helped prepare my bath.
And by the time I finished getting ready, I finally felt somewhat human again.
When I stepped out of my room—
Lucian was already waiting outside.
Leaning against the wall.
Arms crossed.
Looking entirely too comfortable.
I stared at him.
He stared back.
"What?"
"Nothing."
For some reason, the sight of him standing there waiting felt ridiculous.
Like a loyal guard dog assigned specifically to me.
A very handsome guard dog.
The thought slipped into my head before I could stop it.
And for the first time that morning—
I almost laughed.