Death looked both amused and exasperated at the same time. She covered her face with one hand as if she couldn't decide whether to laugh or cry.
"The Well of Infinity is almost broken because of you," she said helplessly.
Deadpool waved his hand dismissively.
"It's not that easy to break something like that. In fact, I think I've improved it."
He leaned back comfortably on the cold marble floor of the hall as if he owned the place.
"It used to be so boring," he continued. "Just some lifeless Q&A machine answering questions all day long. Ask something, get an answer, end of story."
He shrugged.
"Where's the fun in that?"
Death raised an eyebrow.
Deadpool grinned.
"Now it's like a live comment section."
He pointed toward the endless abyss of the Well of Infinity.
"Anyone who spends time on the internet knows this: a video without bullet comments is like soda without carbonation."
He raised a finger dramatically.
"Flat. Tasteless. Completely soulless."
Death shook her head slowly.
"Nonsense."
Deadpool instantly replied:
"Nonsense is also a kind of sense."
Death sighed softly, but a faint smile still appeared at the corner of her lips.
After a moment she asked again,
"Wade… where have you been this time?"
Her voice carried a hint of curiosity.
"Did you travel to other worlds again?"
Deadpool nodded casually.
"Yeah."
He stretched out on the floor completely, resting his head on his arms like someone lounging on a beach instead of lying in the palace of Death.
Then he began telling his story.
Everything he had experienced recently…
The places he had visited.
The strange people he had met.
The ridiculous battles he had survived.
The stories flowed naturally from his mouth as if he were simply chatting with an old friend.
Because in a way, Death truly was one of the few beings he trusted completely.
She didn't care about his ugly scars.
She didn't care about his insanity.
She didn't care about his poverty or ridiculous behavior.
She simply liked him for who he was.
Of course, Deadpool still edited a few details.
Certain scenes involving girls were… carefully omitted.
Death listened quietly the entire time.
Her eyes sparkled with interest.
"Oh… I really wish I could go to those other universes with you," she said softly.
But both of them knew that was impossible.
Death was not just a being.
She was the embodiment of the concept of Death itself.
If she ever left this universe…
Then death itself would disappear.
No living thing would ever die again.
At first, that might sound wonderful.
But the reality would be terrifying.
The seriously ill would suffer endlessly without release.
Those drifting through space after planetary disasters would wander forever in silent loneliness.
Evil people would exploit their immortality to commit endless atrocities.
Without death, life would lose balance.
The universe would slowly descend into uncontrollable chaos.
Suddenly, Deadpool raised his hand.
It was slowly becoming transparent.
His body was fading.
"I guess it's time," he said quietly.
"I'm leaving, sweetheart."
Death gently touched his face.
"Go," she whispered softly.
"My love."
Then she added something strange.
"Right now… you can belong to anyone."
"But you alone do not belong to Death."
She looked at him with deep affection.
"But one day… you will belong only to me."
Death had existed since the beginning of the universe.
She had witnessed countless beings who claimed they would live forever.
Immortals.
Gods.
Cosmic entities.
Yet over billions of years, time eventually defeated them all.
One by one…
They all came to her.
No matter how much they struggled.
No matter how powerful they were.
Death believed Deadpool would be no exception.
One day…
He would arrive here permanently.
He would sit beside her throne.
And remain there until the end of the universe itself.
Within moments, Deadpool completely disappeared inside her embrace.
The hall became quiet again.
Death remained lying on the floor for a while.
Her gaze rested on the bandage wrapped around her ring finger.
After a long moment, she stood up slowly.
Her beautiful form gradually dissolved again.
Her flesh vanished.
Her skin faded.
She once again became the black-robed skeleton Queen of Death.
Then she walked back to her throne step by step.
---
New York City
United States
A man whose entire body looked like it had suffered third-degree burns lay lazily across a sofa.
He sighed dramatically.
Does this sound familiar?
"They say Franklin is everyone's friend," he muttered bitterly.
"Then why does this 'friend' abandon me to guard an empty apartment like this?"
Deadpool stared blankly at the ceiling.
The $61,000 he had earned from the so-called "ketchup couple" had disappeared almost instantly.
Now he was broke again.
Spectacularly broke.
Gloriously broke.
Don't ask where the money went.
He definitely didn't spend it on buying a discounted superhero suit.
Absolutely not.
Deadpool sighed again.
Then he pulled out something from his pocket.
A Sling Ring.
He slipped it onto his finger.
A powerful spiritual force surged from his body and flowed into the ring.
Deadpool closed his eyes and concentrated intensely.
He tried imagining a bank vault in his mind.
Huge steel doors.
Piles of money.
Mountains of gold bars.
Safes full of diamonds.
Then he waved his hand dramatically in the air.
Sparks flickered briefly.
Tiny orange particles appeared.
Then they disappeared.
Nothing happened.
Deadpool opened one eye.
"…Seriously?"
He scratched his head.
Apparently being poor had an unexpected side effect.
He couldn't even imagine what a real bank vault looked like.
At that moment—
Ding-dong.
The doorbell rang.
Deadpool jumped up instantly.
"A client?!"
He rushed toward the door like a rocket and opened it eagerly.
Standing outside was a beautiful blonde woman with blue eyes and a stunning figure.
She was dressed like a wild west cowgirl.
"Hi Wade," she said cheerfully.
"Long time no see."
Deadpool blinked.
Then he gasped.
"Inez?!"
"What are you doing here?"
The woman smiled.
This was Outlaw Inez Temple, a mutant known for her super strength, incredible endurance, and excellent firearm skills.
Granted…
That description sounded suspiciously similar to a hundred other superheroes.
But hey, at least she wasn't Hawkeye.
Somewhere far away—
Hawkeye suddenly sneezed.
"Achoo!"
Back at the door, Inez gently tapped Deadpool's nose.
Then she wrapped her arms around him in a warm hug.
"Of course I came because I missed you."
Deadpool froze for half a second.
Then he hugged her back happily.
"That's wonderful," he whispered near her ear.
"My crazy Inez."
Inez laughed.
She rubbed her shoulder playfully against him.
"Who could possibly be crazier than you, Wade?"
Suddenly—
A dagger appeared at her neck.
Deadpool's voice became cold.
"Nice try."
He stared at her carefully.
"Little Wade is already awake."
Then he tilted his head.
"But before we continue… could you tell me who you really are?"
He paused.
"Also clarify something for me."
"Are you a man or a woman?"
The woman's expression froze briefly.
Then she smiled brilliantly.
"Wade… you're still so cautious."
Deadpool shrugged.
"Not cautious?"
"What if someone steals my backdoor key?"
She laughed.
"So where did I make a mistake?"
Deadpool replied casually.
"Too many places."
"You don't actually know Inez."
He counted on his fingers.
"If the real Inez hugged me like that, my upper body would already look like the daily menu of a Japanese adult film actress."
He continued calmly.
"Also, 'Crazy Inez' isn't a cute nickname."
"It's her childhood trauma."
"The last time I said that phrase to her, she sat on my pelvis and broke it over five hundred times."
Deadpool sighed.
"Can you imagine that combination of pain and pleasure?"
"I have never hated super strength so much."
He paused thoughtfully.
"Actually… thinking about it now…"
"It wasn't that bad."
Then he pointed at her chest.
"Also your body proportions are outdated."
"Before we last met, Inez got another enhancement."
"Now they're at least two sizes bigger than yours."
As soon as he finished speaking—
The figure in front of him suddenly changed.
Her skin rippled like liquid.
Her appearance shifted instantly.
Blue skin.
Red hair.
Golden eyes.
The true identity was revealed.
Deadpool blinked.
"…Cousin?"
Raven stared at him.
Deadpool coughed.
"Sorry."
"I meant Raven."
Then he sighed dramatically.
"If you had told me earlier, we could have skipped the whole conversation."
Deadpool suddenly remembered something horrifying.
Mystique often wandered around completely naked, relying on her shapeshifting ability to imitate clothing.
Which meant…
When she hugged him earlier…
Deadpool bent forward defensively.
Little Wade was extremely awake now.
Raven ignored him completely.
She walked past him and sat on the sofa.
Her expression turned serious.
"Wade… Erik has been captured."
Deadpool waved casually.
"I know."
"He gets captured every few months."
"Captured… escaped… captured again…"
"It's basically his hobby now."
Two months earlier, a member of Magneto's Brotherhood of Mutants had been arrested.
The mutant had attacked a human using his powers.
However, the evidence showed that the human had insulted him first.
A personal attack.
A nasty provocation.
Which eventually escalated into violence.
Deadpool never understood these situations.
Why provoke someone who literally has superpowers?
People could act brave online.
But face-to-face?
Deadpool would run faster than a rocket.
Unfortunately for that mutant…
The judge ruled against him.
The jury agreed.
He was sentenced to prison.
But the judge forgot something important.
That mutant worked for Magneto.
And Magneto did not tolerate disrespect.
Soon afterward—
The judge who made that ruling was found dead.
Not just him.
The entire courthouse was reduced to a puddle of twisted flesh and metal.
------------------------------------------
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