[TW: Implied Sexual Abuse]
A deep inhale was all it took for Devas to dissipate into a state of perfect mimicry.
The void that has nothing but darkness crumbled, revealing a familiar yet unattainable scenery.
The land was prosperous, and flames flickered inside various lamps as every post and corner was not left a single shadow to exist. Ramblings and laughter echoed as different stalls filled the streets.
Mortals ran around, crowding each other, gently brushing off each other's shoulders. Some carried a dignified posture, a few were children running and causing worry, and most were lively young people having fun.
My bare feet walked in Devas that mimicked Sinrad. The whole scene enveloped me, but never to interact.
I looked down at my barefeet touching the ground, the noise filled my ears, as my energy flew around. The street had traces of a mortal that shared a part of his future with me; his soul ravaged and in a wretched state walked through this street months ago.
My fingers trembled as I walked from stall to stall, a smile on my lips while talking to mortals that can never hear me.
It seems Sidron finally managed to weave a destiny for my seed. This thought flickered on my mind, as my various and tireless tries of connecting to the mortal were impossible for a long time.
Seeds...vessels, need three distinct energies to truly be capable of holding life and acquiring the capacity of death.
Soul. The mortal was foolish enough to accept me as his son, inevitably promising a part of his soul to me.
He was nothing but an insane mortal, however... even insane men are capable of selling their souls.
A smile escaped my lips as I walked through the mortal's kingdom. The time and efforts shed to bring this land into prosperity must have been heavy...
Order can be felt from the smiles and brightness of these people's eyes.
My father, driven into insanity, remained unmoving for months after the war. He said nothing but "Son", demanding me like a madman.
I shook my head and then chuckled; the lightness of my energy spread along the kingdom.
With the soul promised, and the vessel given to Sidron... now it's time for fate to allow another existence.
"Hm~ Hm~" I hummed as I walked into the palace. Soldiers and servants were all over the land, but I paid them no mind. After all, everything before my eyes is nothing but a mimic of the place that my promised soul resides.
I walked and walked and walked, and soon came across a tall woman with long golden hair. Her face was soft, gentle, paired with her fair, almost pinkish skin. Her posture was straight and intimidating as she walked graciously towards a hall.
She was wearing a full red robe and a thin red veil.
I encircled her and then gave a cold gaze at her existence. This one was praised by various servants as the peerless beauty of the empire.
Empire? Ah, Ro En belongs under an empire.
I slightly squinted my eyes; a part of my promised soul resides in her body.
This should be mother then.
She walked and stopped in front of a majestic chamber. Servants lined up behind her as I simply stood in front, humming as I stared intently at the tightly closed door.
My mother kneeled.
"To the Fourth Pillar of Hongyang, the King of Ro En, this humble servant offers her life and future to you."
My eyes drifted over her covered face before I simply walked barefoot inside the chamber. There, the father that I chose sat on the bed, wearing red robes as well.
He was quiet, and his gaze was unmoving; he did not bother answering Mother, and so I simply sat down next to him. I watched his foolish face as I was reminded of his proud and brave demeanor months ago.
To break so easily, humans really are so fragile.
The door opened slowly, revealing my mother who politely kneeled for a set time and, without waiting for permission, went in. Her gaze fell on my father on the bed, softening with both pity and devotion.
"Your Highness, your Queen has arrived." She mumbled softly, weighing the other's reaction.
But my father has long been a fool.
He promised a future to me... it is bound to mess with his head unless he fulfills his duty.
Devas trembled as I watched my mother take off her veil, her smiling lips revealed.
Tilting my head, I knew what kind of fate Sidron had rushed to weave under the ticking time.
My black robes draping down on the mimicked chamber as my mother slowly removed her robes, fully aware of the sin she's about to commit.
My lips curved in a taunting smile, and thenI turned to look at my father, who kept on mumbling, "Son, my son, where is my son?"
I leaned close to him and then took a look at my naked mother approaching this fool, and then whispered.
"Mother will bring this son to you, wait."
...
[5 Years After, Ro En- Realm of Sinrad]
"Hm~ Hm~ Hm~" Humming, I sat on a wet bridge in the middle of the night. A deep lake under.
The moon shone brightly, tickling my skin, and the wind blew on my face, making me giggle at its coldness.
No. No. So cold. I shivered and then covered my face, stopping the wind from being mean. I then quietly lay down on the bridge with my chest against the floor, covering my face, then my ears, because the wind won't stop tickling me.
"Stop, stop. Yun can't get sick... I will die," I mumbled with my lips against the wet bridge. My lips brushed against the wooden floor, scratching them while I shook my head to make the wind stop.
The wind kept acting mean, finding my face to tickle even though I am trying so hard to hide from it. My face slowly frowned and rolled around the bridge, my clothing wet as I shook the bad wind away. I raised my hands and swooshed it on the air, and finally the wind scattered away.
A sigh escaped my lips. "Good, good wind."
I sat back up and looked around the dark place before I crawled towards the edges of the bridge. My long dark hair fell from my bun, head poking out to stare at the water.
A child was there. His face was pale and his eyes black.
"Why is Yun there?" I mumbled.
The Yun in the water blinked silently when the water moved, ruining his face, followed by the sudden pour of rain.
Ah. Looking up at the rain, I paid no mind to the Yun who became ugly under the water.
My favorite robe was slowly drenched in the rain, but I remained still. The water from the sky was cold and nice, it touches my skin and tickles me. I slowly lay down and let the rain pour on me.
"Hehe, hehe."
I raised my small limbs trying to catch the rain, but a loud sound boomed, followed by blinding lights from the sky, which made me stop.
The rain was mean. I immediately pursed my lips and rolled on my chest, looking for the Yun in the water.
The Yun in the water was ugly, but he was not mean. I shall play with him instead. Maybe I can send him to my Sister Yo Ran, so she stops pestering me.
Or maybe, sister can just join him under the water. I nodded in satisfaction, planning to push my sister here next time she demands I play with her.
She can have this ugly Yun.
I moved my hand and started reaching for the waters below. My cold hands touched the almost freezing water, before I swiftly moved against its flow, looking at the other Yun become uglier.
His eyes were everywhere, his lips were crooked, and his face was like a smudged painting in the study.
"How come you copied my face? Do you not fear I might strip your face in anger?" I asked him, but his mouth only openned but no sound echoed.
I frowned and then squirmed on the floor before moving my head closer to the water, "Speak clearly, do you have no tongue?"
The Yun in the water remained silent, just looking at me occasionally, which made me stare at him in anger. I quickly splashed my hand on him, his face looking like it melted every time I tried to grab his face.
"Come! Come!" I called out, but no matter what, I couldn't catch him.
I watched as he frowned angrily at me, and then smiled at me when I grinned at him. Surely, this Yun is foul-mannered.
But my eyes quickly lost interest in him when I saw golden fish swimming under him.
A small smile escaped from my lips, and without a single thought, my quick hands caught a fish effortlessly. Forgetting about the other Yun, I rolled on my back and raised my hand holding the fish and stared at it.
" Hello there, " I murmured, amused. I gazed intently at the pretty fish.
The fish was golden orange, and it was slipping against my skin. It was flapping and wiggling against my hold, causing its scales to cut my skin. My hand was wounded, and it was painful, but I refused to let go and simply tightened the grip.
The fish must've been frightened by the Yun in the water, so now he is angry at me.
" Hush now… you're alright. " I spoke softly and tightened my hold once again, afraid that the fish would slip with all the flapping. The rain kept pouring against my skin while I stared intently at the fish whose mouth kept on opening and then closing, like how a dog acts when he wants to play.
" Hm... " I tilted my head as I thought, and then raised my hands that were tightly holding the fish up in the air. A warm liquid came from my wound dripping onto my cheeks with the rainwater... and fish water.
I just stared intently at the fish before I sat up, crossing my legs.
What makes fish different than a dog? Tightening my hold on it with my right hand, I raised my left to inspect its mouth. I inserted a finger inside the fish's tiny mouth and curiously rummaged its insides.
I did not notice the red-linguid dripping on my fingers; I simply pried open the fish's mouth to see what it had eaten for it to always gape its lips open. One finger seems not to be enough, so I put another one, pushing it deeply.
My memory of my sister forcefully opening her dog's mouth to take out the jade it had eaten circled my mind.
I couldn't stop my fingers from cracking the fish's mouth open. I just want to know what is inside— what makes a fish, fish?
I pushed my fingers deeper and then pulled out the fish's insides, staring and inspecting them as if it were such a rare sight. I was so busy with inspecting the little fish, but I realized that even if I end up opening its stomach, I still won't be able to tell what's different.
A fish is a fish, and a dog is a dog, I suppose.
A loud sound of a trumpet made me look up and side by side, as eyes slowly narrowed in realization. It was a very familiar sound.
I hurriedly licked my lips before staring at the fish, whose body was so flat, red liquid dripping on my hands, but the rain had helped wash away its stains. I then held the fish gently in my hands and chuckled at my foolishness.
"Sorry, I'll put them back," I murmured and then ignorantly pushed back in all the intestines and organs I forcefully pulled out earlier. I scratched my head slightly when Sister opened her dog's mouth... I don't remember her having to put back the jade, though?
I looked at the fish for a while. A long while, but it didn't show any displeasure, so I suppose it is not mad at Yun. I smiled, then stood up, almost slipping due to the wet floor, but I immediately raised one of my hands and held onto the railings to support my tiny weight.
I looked down at the fish and smiled once again after realizing that I didn't drop it. The sound of the trumpet once again echoed, followed by the shouts and loud footsteps of both people and horses, filling up my tiny ears.
The Yun on the water was no longer there; he must've been afraid to be discovered by my mother and be thrown away. I stared down at the lake beneath the bridge and quickly threw the fish back into the water.
" Go home now, I'll play with you again next time. " I whispered and then ran away with my little legs.
The rain grew stronger, and the sound from the sky was louder than the sounds of the trumpets and the people shouting my name in worry. Chuckling, I made no noise and simply hopped along the way.
I ran in circles laughing against the flashes of light in the sky, I raised my red-stained hands in the air, and let the rain wash off the stain.
That fish is a bit naughty, dirtying my hand. But it is alright, Yun is not angry.
I looked down at the grass before removing my footwear, letting my bare feet touch it. The unfamiliar feeling made me flinch, before I slowly rubbed my feet against the prickling grass.
" Oh... ohh. " I couldn't help but feel excited. It was my first time feeling the grass with my bare feet.
" YOUR HIGHNESS! "
" YOUR HIGHNESS!? WHERE ARE YOU? "
" ANSWER US, YOUR HIGHNESS! "
The screams begging for me to respond simply passed by my one ear and left the other. My ears shut down, and all I was fixated on was the feeling of grass and soil beneath me.
Slowly, I sat down on the mud. I reached out my hand and grabbed a fist of dirt before staring at it intently.
" YUN!? Answer me! Where are you, Yun? "
Mother?
This time, I turned my head in the direction of that voice. I was about to speak up, but looked at my dirty robe and dirty hands. Yun is not allowed to play in the dirt.... Slowly, I ignored my mother.
The dirt was too fun to play with to give it up. I let my mother cry in worry, and simply smiled and continued playing with the mud.
Rustle. Rustle.
My eyes dilated as a pair of white ears peeked against the leaves, almost quivering due to the cold. I tilted my head in awe and slowly crawled towards the rabbit hiding from me.
" It's raining. Why are you out here? " I whispered, droplets of rain falling inside my open lips.
The rabbit hopped excitedly, but it went the wrong way instead of me, so I lunged at it without any thoughts in mind, my face hitting the walls in front.
"Caught you..." I mumbled. Warm liquid dripped from my broken nose, as I had various scratches along my eyebrows and a cut on my forehead.
Blinking away the washed-off red liquid from the rainwater, I tightened my hold on the rabbit and gently cuddled it against my arms.
Poor rabbit. It must've been scared.
" Are you cold? " I asked, whispering as if the rabbit could understand my words. I tried to blink my eyes as my vision started to blur due to the mixture of red stains and raindrops getting on my eyes.
Unknowingly, my hold tightened, choking the pretty one.
The rabbit tensed up and eventually trembled against my hold. It tried to escape from me, and my small hands unconsciously slapped it to tame it.
" Behave. " I muttered coldly, a bit dizzy with my itchy head. The rabbit was naughty, and it squealed and violently tried to escape.
My head went cold for some reason as the dizziness made me look down at the ungrateful rabbit, who seemed to hate Yun.
"Hush now," I muttered and touched my forehead. There was red liquid.
My head hurts. The rabbit cried and squealed so loudly that I almost wanted to throw him to the ugly Yun.
It wasn't like the fish earlier who was obedient.
"Hush, hush," I tried to comfort it, and covered its mouth, but it only bit my hands and continued crying so loud against my hold.
Haa.
I grabbed both of its ears, swung its body, and slammed it to the ground. Something cracked and echoed, which made me look around. But nothing was there, so I only tilted my head in confusion.
Another cry escaped from the rabbit's mouth. Making me look at it and pick it up, "Did the sound come from you? Were you scaring Yun?"
I know the rabbit can't speak, so I forgave it for not answering me, but it cried again, so I realized it was really guilty. Why is it so mean? Scaring me? Doesn't it know, Yun is scared of the dark?
My headache intensified, so I swung it again. And again. And again. Again. Again. Then again.
Until it has stopped squealing. Until it has stopped making that cracking sound. Until it looked like a piece of battered meat.
After a while, the rabbit no longer expressed its fear and dislike towards me. And finally, the silence once filled my mind.
A loud and deep sigh left my mouth before I stared at the body of the rabbit, holding it by its ears. Red liquid was dripping from its unrecognizable body, and my tiny hands were bruised because it was heavy.
I pursed my lips, and then my lips quivered. Now it's ugly...
Tears fell from my eyes, but no sound of a cry left my mouth. Sister always said it was weird, but Mother said it was fine.
Yun does not care what they think; however, I care that the rabbit is now dirty and ugly.
Tears fell from my eyes again, and I tried to look down at the rabbit in my hands. Hoping it still can be cleaned.
I sniffed slightly and then started walking. My lips pursed tightly as I cuddled it in my arms.
Father, where is Father?
My robe was now also dirty with the red liquid from the rabbit, and there was no more rain to wash it off. Surely, the rabbit hated Yun. It not only made itself ugly, but it also made Yun ugly.
Another tear fell from my eyes, but I just kept quiet. I caressed the red-stained fur, gently playing with the rabbit's ears. At least, this time the rabbit seemed to have calmed down.
It was now ugly but obedient. I cried again... why can't pretty things be kind?
"I will fix you, " I murmured and then walked back towards the bridge. I walked past it, and on the other side, found the small hole that I crawled into before.
I kneeled in front of it and then pushed the rabbit into it first, and then followed. It was a very narrow passage, and the wall was so thick that I had to crawl while my heart was breaking apart.
A light flickered from the other side, causing me to stop sniffing, but I continued pushing the rabbit and crawled my way in. As soon as I raised my head, a pair of familiar eyes looked at me.
" Father, " I muttered.
Father was standing while holding a torch. He was wearing a sleeping robe while carrying a long sword in his other hand. Slowly, he looked at me from head to toe and picked up the rabbit.
He stared intently into it for a while, and then he slowly bent his knees and kneeled in front of me before caressing my pale cheeks.
" Are you hurt, my child? " My father's voice was trembling, and his eyes were flickering. His hand was even shaking so much, I think he must've been so cold because of the rain.
I smiled at him, "Father, clean this rabbit for me?"
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