Season 3 chapter 114
The 30-Year Punchline
Kniya held up his hands in mock surrender, a highly devious smirk stretching across his face.
"Okay, Mantouse, don't be angry," Kniya placated cheerfully. "I know that a man could get really, really mad if he hasn't talked to a single girl for nearly thirty years. That is a really sad thing. But you know... you still could have fucked a girl by now. I mean, fucking requires absolutely no talking."
Mantouse closed his eyes, aggressively rubbing his temples as if his brain were actively bleeding.
"Okay, Kniya," Mantouse begged, his voice cracking with pure exhaustion. "Can you please, just for one second, be serious?"
Malesh smoothly adjusted his silk tie, his dark eyes locking onto the broken billionaire with a perfect, deadpan expression.
"Okay, okay, okay, okay. Yeah, we are serious," Malesh stated flatly. "So, don't be sad, Mantouse. We are going to give you Leon's personal number so that you can directly provide him with your underwear. I know that you have a huge crush on him."
Mantouse violently grabbed his own hair.
"Just cut this shit!" Mantouse exploded, completely losing his mind. "Cut these shitty jokes! I don't know where you guys even write them, or where you guys even prepare these kinds of jokes all the time! Just cut this out and please focus on this!"
The Motive of Chaos
Malesh simply stared at Mantouse, entirely unfazed by the screaming.
"Okay, okay, Mantouse, whatever that is," Malesh replied. He kept his face perfectly deadpan, delivering the insult as a completely dry, effortless joke. "Well, from your looks and the way you talk, you are obviously a highly professional guy. You are completely serious all the time. And that is exactly why it is incredibly important for us to make you talk like a complete idiot. It helps to lighten your mood. That is why it is so important for us to joke."
Malesh paused, his deadpan gaze taking in the financier's absolute meltdown.
"And as we all know, you are probably standing there right now thinking about how we managed to successfully get this money," Malesh continued flatly, leaning into the deadpan humor. "But we are absolutely not going to tell you anyways, so just stop thinking about it. Go find that fucking thing out by yourself."
Malesh stepped forward, offering a rare, straightforward explanation for their absolute madness.
"Basically, the thing is... now this entire situation looks too funny," Malesh stated, his deadpan delivery making the absurdity even better. "I always want funny things, and this is the core motive of Kniya and me."
"Yeah!" Kniya cheered, aggressively agreeing with his best friend. "Because, you know, funny things entertain you!"
Mantouse glared at them, his chest heaving with pure aristocratic outrage.
"You are absolutely not entertaining me!" Mantouse yelled defensively. "You are literally making me depressed with all your talks!"
Kniya smirked, leaning forward and giving the furious underground boss a highly knowing wink.
"Oh, don't talk like that, Mantu," Kniya teased smoothly. "I know that deep down, you are enjoying it too."
### **The Quantum Breach**
The Presidential Office of Seistain was supposed to be the most secure, highly impenetrable fortress in the entire heavily industrialized nation. The walls were constructed from three feet of reinforced concrete and solid Kavilson steel plating.
President Kywon Hadous sat behind his massive, polished mahogany desk, aggressively signing a stack of classified military documents. The room was perfectly silent, save for the scratching of his expensive fountain pen and the heavy ticking of the analog grandfather clock in the corner.
Suddenly, the solid concrete wall to his left began to violently ripple like a disturbed puddle of water.
President Kywon froze, his pen hovering over the paper.
Without a single sound, a tall guy wearing a highly detailed, theatrical mask literally walked straight through the solid wall. He didn't break it. He didn't blow it up. He just casually strolled through the solid molecular structure of the concrete without even bumping his shoulders, entirely defying every single law of physics.
Before Kywon could even hit the emergency panic button under his desk, the heavy, reinforced mahogany doors of the office burst completely open.
Four highly armed elite guards rushed into the room, their heavy steam-rifles instantly raised and aimed directly at the intruder.
"Hey! What the fuck are you doing?!" the lead guard screamed, his eyes darting frantically between the unbroken wall and the masked intruder. "How did you manage to enter this room?! Put your hands in the fucking air!"
The masked guy didn't panic. In fact, a highly arrogant, deeply chaotic smirk was clearly visible from the way his jaw moved beneath the mask. He slowly raised his right hand, completely ignoring the rifles pointed at his chest.
He playfully pointed a single finger directly at the squad of guards.
"Bang," the masked guy whispered.
Instantly, the four elite guards dropped their weapons and fell face-first onto the expensive carpet, completely unconscious. They hit the ground like heavy sacks of bricks.
President Kywon Hadous violently pushed his chair back, standing up with pure, unfiltered terror radiating from his face.
"Who the hell are you?!" Kywon demanded, his authoritative presidential voice cracking slightly. "How did you enter this facility?! What do you want, and what the fuck did you just do to my elite guards?!"
The masked guy casually strolled over to the expensive leather sofas in the center of the room and aggressively threw himself onto one, crossing his legs like he owned the place.
"Oh, it is absolutely nothing, man," the masked guy laughed smoothly, waving his hand dismissively. "It is just a thing that I don't want any kind of fucking disturbance between the highly important talks of the two fucking most important people in the world. Namely, you and me."
The masked guy tilted his head, letting out a dark, mocking chuckle.
"Why are you so sad, Mr. President? You really shouldn't be sad!" the intruder taunted, his voice dripping with absolute chaotic amusement. "Though, I guess I would be sad too if my military was this garbage. The security of the DI'an forces is so incredibly weak! It is actually embarrassing! Ha ha ha!"
The Bullet and The Banter
Before the masked guy could finish his hysterical laughter, a deafening gunshot violently echoed through the massive presidential office.
*BANG!*
A heavy, high-velocity bullet tore straight through the side of the masked guy's head. The sheer kinetic force violently snapped his neck to the side.
President Kywon flinched, falling back into his chair in sheer horror.
Standing in the newly opened doorway were two figures. The first guy, wearing a long, dramatic coat, was holding a smoking revolver. Beside him stood a perpetually irritated, highly aggressive companion.
"So," the man in the coat stated flatly, lowering his smoking gun. "I knew that you were always here in this country. You just never left that."
For three completely silent seconds, the masked guy just sat there. Dark red blood began heavily pouring out from the smoking bullet hole in the side of his mask, dripping down his neck and staining his collar.
But then, impossibly, he slowly turned his head back toward the doorway and began to laugh. A deep, echoing, genuinely chaotic laugh. The bleeding wound visibly glitched, swirling with glowing blue quantum energy before instantly sealing itself shut, leaving only the blood behind.
"Oh, Doctor! You came back again!" the masked guy cheered, completely ignoring the blood on his clothes and clapping his hands together like an excited child. "I genuinely thought you would never appear again! Since we are officially meeting again, we should at least properly greet each other. How have you been, man?!"
The irritated guy standing next to the Doctor glared at the masked intruder with absolute, pure hatred.
"Well, I think so you just wanna die here," the irritated guy threatened, aggressively pulling back the hammer on his own heavy-caliber pistol. "That is exactly why you came to meet us twice, because you want to get killed. This time we won't let you build the climax like the previous time."
The Doctor didn't even blink. He just stared at the masked man with deadpan intensity. "Assistant. Shoot him."
The Assistant violently snapped his head toward the Doctor, completely losing his professional composure at the title.
"I am not your fucking assistant!" he exploded, pointing his gun at the Doctor for a split second before aiming it back at the masked guy. "Basically, this entire thing is just a stupid act, and I absolutely do not want to follow the orders of a fucking medieval guy!"
Despite his aggressive rant, the Assistant spun around and pulled the trigger.
*BANG!*
The second bullet hit the masked guy directly in the chest. He didn't even flinch. He just looked down at the smoking hole in his jacket, highly offended.
"What the fuck do you think I am?!" the masked guy yelled, standing up from the sofa and throwing his arms wide open in pure theatrical outrage. "Do you honestly think if a guy can actively revive people from the dead, and literally pass right through a solid concrete wall by changing the foundational quantum reality of this world, that you can kill me with this fucking useless Kavilson steel iron bullet?!"
The Doctor lowered his brow, genuinely confused by the highly specific corporate branding.
"Hey, wait a minute," the Doctor interrupted flatly. "Why the hell are you putting Kavilson steel in between this conversation?"
The masked guy instantly pointed an accusing finger directly at the Doctor, letting out an incredibly loud, hysterical villain laugh.
"Aha! Are you a supporter of Kavilson steel?!" the masked intruder accused loudly. "I fucking knew it! I know that you are secretly backing Kavilson steel stocks! You corrupt bastard!"
### **The Climax Builder**
The masked guy completely ignored the President of the country, who was currently hiding behind his desk and questioning his entire reality. Instead, he dramatically stepped up onto the expensive glass coffee table, posing like an absolute psychopath.
"Listen to me, Doctor! I am a classic movie villain!" he declared passionately, waving his arms to emphasize his own narrative importance. "I am exactly that kind of villain! You simply cannot kill me with your boring, conventional weapons! You need to actually find out the hidden, incredibly convoluted methods to defeat me! I am literally just here for the climax building!"
*(The absolute irony, of course, was that this "villain" was secretly saving lives behind the scenes, effectively making him the most confusing, chaotic hero in the entire world. But he was deeply committed to the bit.)*
The masked guy checked an imaginary watch on his wrist, dramatically sighing.
"Well, Mr. President, I think so I have to go," the masked guy announced, giving Kywon a highly sarcastic salute. "Because I really don't want this whole thing to be more worse than it already is. Well, yeah, I am going. Enjoy your time in this absolute bureaucratic brothel."
Just as his body started to glow with blinding blue quantum energy, the masked guy paused, looking back over his shoulder with a vicious smirk.
"And just so you know," he teased loudly, his voice echoing through the room, "Arvonia is much better than your country in every single aspect! Ha ha ha!"
With a brilliant flash of light, his body violently glitched into a swarm of floating digital pixels. He phased straight down through the solid marble floor, entirely disappearing from the room and leaving President Kywon, the Doctor, and the angry Assistant standing in absolute, stunned silence.