"..."
Aefia felt her breathe leave her lungs with a stinging pain of boredom.
Her entire library had been cleansed deeply to the bottom, leaving her with only study materials to look through. And at a time like this, she wasn't nerdy enough to even steal a glance at the topics that may be coming up in a test or exam soon.
"They always think of themselves as high and knowledgious. Why not they use their knowledge to save their own empire?!" She whispered to herself while slamming her hand onto the pillow resting peacefully next to her. She grabbed it by the case and yanked it, then burying her face into it to avoid looking at the gigantic, luxury looking, quarantine... Despite it being just a room she had to live in to avoid 'dying'.
"What kind of a sick joke have they found themselves in?! I am literally saving their lives!" She shouted with a muffled voice into the pillow, while clenching it tightly at the edges. "Or do they simply want to walk onto the fire I am trying to warn them about?! Thinking they will find a new treasure hidden inside once they learned how to extinguish the flames!"
"The only treasure I have received from within the fire, was two dead bodies!" She continued blabbering to herself in a loud voice. As if the servants who hated her couldn't eavesdrop into whatever she was currently saying. "No... Three to current date! Almost four if I hadn't given up my element to be able to save Nada!"
Her anger bloomed into a fiery rage as she pulled the pillow off her face and slammed it beside her. Putting it back on the place it was before she had decided it was time to scream to the entire universe about her life.
She stretched her limbs outwards while making a childish face and slamming her fist onto the sofa at either sides. Then, she stomped her feet with pure rage. If anyone were currently downstairs, they would have run to the third floor and bursted through her room door, just to complain about the constant noise.
But she would still be as reckless as she was right now, and probably slam a pillow into their face. To the outside world, it may seem like she was a growing teenager, but when they got to know her around this time of her life, they would say she was mentally eight years old. Maybe even four.
"Ugh! I am hungry all of a sudden!" She finally shouted while slamming her fist onto the armrest one last time. "My brain isn't getting the nutrients it needs! That's why I am so mad! But I don't want to eat because they didn't let me do what I wanted to do!"
Then, silence followed.
It was as if every sort of sound had been swallowed suddenly by void. Every sound except the ringing at her ears had lost its voice and it felt very much lonely now. She sat upright, then, leaned back against the sofa's headboard. Her expressions fell, and her pale, beautiful face remained. Her eyes looked towards the table in front of her, as she kicked off her shoes and brought her legs up.
She hugged her knees while zoning out into her thoughts. Her face half buried into the space between her knees and her arms. Darn... What was that for? She thought to herself while looking towards the door, then changing the direction of her gaze again. What was it that actually made me mad? Was it actually because I was lonely... Or was it because I wanted to get out of this palace, this room, this family... And this life... Maybe try again in the next life with better hopes.
No... That can't be right... What was it then? She asked into her kind while furrowing her brows and gritting her teeth. Then, a voice sounded into her mind, followed by the sound of blood splattering onto the snow. Slowly, an image appeared into her mind, then a scene, unfolding as she got more dragged down into her dream reality.
The blonde hair fluttering against the wind, eyes that were bright red, the face that was slightly aged then the one she remembered more vividly. The Countess... Lady Elanor's older sister. But now... It would be Countess Elanor's late older sister.
Come to think of it... She was one of the people who had sacrificed their lives to keep me standing a few more minutes, which had now turned into days. She found her eyes staring into the ceiling as her head tilted all the way back. Her hair moving away from her face, living only a few locks to still be covering her forehead.
What was their point... To keep a mere, violent and sinful child alive? To keep someone alive by taking their own lives... And that someone couldn't make good use of their sacrifice... They chose the wrong person to trust their lives to.
She answered her own questions back. Then, a vicious smile landed onto her face as she looked down, her face pale and bright, as if she had stood in the snow a few minutes ago. No wonder, the late Countess had called her Snow beauty. For someone like Aefia, her face was more lively in the harsh cold then in the warm sunshine that every other girls were like.
The logic that had gotten the late Countess into this thought was, the fact that when blood dropped onto snow, it would end up looking beautiful. Despite the person having the nastiest bloodline by killing or having the worst way to execute someone... Their own blood, when spilled, they would look like a beautiful colour. An eye-catching colour.
Aefia, on the other hand, when her blood is spilled onto snow, was beautiful, and when blood fell on her skin, it looked beautiful too... Making her a perfect match for what she did... Killing and hunting and fighting. Getting injured, poisoning herself, hurting herself and not giving a care... Were what suited Aefia's appearance the most. Even her personality, being a quick-wit, was a perfect match.
It looked like she was born to a doll, a perfect doll who suited crimson and was innocent. But she turned out to grow into a doll who had broken all restrains to come alive and rule over whatever they found closest to them. Eventually, the doll would end up slaughtering whoever were their enemies, making their thorned path more like a red carpet.
And based on logic by some low minded humans... The red carpet were for people who were famous, pretty and savage.
Although Aefia had two of three of the traits... She had her own red carpets laid out for her at different directions. Whatever path of life she chose to take now, meant to walk on those liquid red carpets.
Like how her life's story had blood stained pages ever since she had turned eight... That blood... Had bleeded through to the other pages due to the lack of attendance. It was unsure of when she would get a clean page to continue writing her life story... But she hoped she didn't need to write anymore. Because the more she was going to write, the more the paper was tearing due to the wetness of the blood.
It was time to discard the book she was writing about... And get a new and more fresher one. One where she would try to change her life in a way that she never needed to kill to survive... Ever again... Unlike how she had to do now.
Aefia looked towards her own hands. They were bandaged and burning. I guess these injuries for all of the kills I have accumulated on from the age of eight... She thought to herself. All my injuries are a consequences for what I have done so far... So I should learn how to live with them now. Because I have left a void for so many families out there.
In the past few days, her guilt had gone out of her mind's world. But she still had an ounce left before she completely went psycho. The life she was leading, anyone would have lost their minds, regardless of what age they were.
To think, she was honestly proud of herself for being a fifteen year old, and one year of staying on a completely different world, she had endured it until here. But she also felt like she had hit a wall... Having lost everything and not being able to break this wall down like she did all those times back.
It was just too tall and too hard to break this time. So she needed to use her head to try and break it... Risking her life in total. And if she survived... She would need to live with a broken skull and half paralysis. Making the next wall even harder then the previous.
But... Nevertheless... A kill or murder would only look beautiful when done with her hands.
She fiddled with her pocket watch, something that could drag her out of the world just by looking at it. It was that ethereal look on it perhaps, that made her feel that way. Maybe the ticking of the time, or just the decorarions.
Growing up, she as a huge fond of cute animals and pretty looking insects. And when it came to those she had as favourites, her family would have described it as 'good looking because they need to kill their enemies with their beauty and their poison'.
She locked her gaze towards the red swallowtail butterfly spinning in a clockwise motion inside the watch. With its head pointed to the current second. The hour hand and the minutes hand were needle-like at the ends, but it was more beautiful and had an intricate pattern on the center, where the metal swelled to allow the sight of the designs carved out.
The outside cover of the watch was the colour gold, and covered in jewels that were formed in a shape of the same butterfly that was inside the watch. She smiled as she continued gazing at the watch and it's flowing time.
When I was younger... They used to say that I liked butterflies because I have what they have in common... Freedom.
Her mind continued while she rested her elbow on the armrest beside her and tilting her head onto it. But then... What about poisonous butterflies? ... Then do I like them because we both are just cursed species? They say bright colours mean poison and venom... Well... Red is comparably a bright colour. And everyone sees me as well suited in the colour of blood... Spilt on snow.
She then tilted her head all the way back, staring onto the ceiling as the sun directly shown its rays into her room. It casted a golden glow over her face, which caused her black eyes to seem more brown. But given that all black eyes were brown, it was easy to consider the fact that her eyes made her look more lively then like a void inside of those dark irises.
Finding it irritating, she lifted her forearm to cover her face from the rays. "I hate summer because of this... But I really like it when the sun is going down... I guess I only like the summer sunset." She muttered to herself while sitting up properly.
Knock. Knock.
"Hey Aefia... It's me." Merissa spoke from outside her door. By the sound of it, she was probably concerned by her lock up and maybe one of the brothers had invited her over to check in on Aefia. Should I allow her in? She might get even more concerned if she sees the hell of my room. Given that I have been skipping school for five days now. Summer sickness is a far cry. It's almost autumn... I think.
A part of me wants to allow her in. But the other part of me wants to be rude to her and reject her.
She let out a sigh after a long moment of silence.
"Come in Merissa. The door is open." She answered back while standing up and quickly fixing her sitting area. I don't care about consequences nowadays. But I can say I still care about my guests' well-being and comfort.
Finally, a hint of the wavy ginger hair, with a bit of reddish hue, came into vision. The naive girl stepped in, looking all different from what she had last seen her as two months ago at the camp. "You seem to have lost a lot of weight..." Aefia asked while staying stood at the edge of her sofa and fixing her expressionles face.
"Well... Yes. My brother had been trying to get me trained for the military this whole week." The girl let out a breathe of relief when inside the room. "And honestly... I just revealed that I don't want to join the millitary, but rather become a medical attendant in the battlefield."
"Isn't that the same thing?" Aefia asked while watching the girl walk over to the opposite sofa. "And either ways... It would be best for a girl to learn self-defense if anything happens..." She spoke.
Suddenly, her mind went into a flashback of seeing her twelve-year-old self standing at the mirror and attending her own wounds to avoid others from catching her injured Bd arising suspicion. It all started with a simple self-defense training to a full blown scheduled missions with intense gun fights.
"But also... I won't actually encourage it. It would change your life completely after that." She added a short while later, while settling down on the sofa. "Anyways... What brings you here?"
"Lewis. He said you won't come out for three days for some reasons. I thought I should pay a visit to ensure you were alright." Merissa spoke while washing off her smile. "I heard... By George... That you are going through somethings... Mentally unstable?"
Ugh... Perks of an overprotective brother I guess...
"Oh nah! I am completely alright! Otherwise I would be attacking everyone around here... Right?" She answered back while waving like a small child in rejection.
"And either ways... He is just worried about my accidentally losing a finger digit and almost losing an entire finger. So to put it properly... He is terrified by it. He thought I was probably psychologically unwell about it." She added a short while later.
"Oh I am so sorry!" Merissa spoke while walking over to Aefia's side.
In her life, besides murder, sacrifices and dreads... Lying was something she was much better at. Lying in terms of acting at the same time.