(Short Chapter)
"Hey, you guys hear the latest news from the ninja world?" Sakusuke said, taking a slow sip of wine.
Just like that, the whole tavern went quiet.
At the Tiger's Tooth, Sakusuke was known as the number one storyteller and gossip dealer. So the moment he opened his mouth, people listened.
"Come on, old man," Tosuke said, waving a hand. "What's there to say? Konoha and Kumo are still fighting, same as always."
He paused, then added with a shrug, "Unless some new village just joined the war?"
Someone in the back snorted. "Pfft. Doesn't matter how many join because Konoha is too strong to lose."
A few murmurs of agreement followed.
Everyone started mentally replaying Konoha's greatest hits from the past few years—three ninja taking on four Kage and walking away fine, three clans wiping out a top-five village, a fourteen-year-old girl killing a Kage.
Stuff like that.
Sakusuke just smirked.
"Alright then," he said, leaning back. "I've got the freshest, most shocking news of the year. But since you're all so eager to act tough..."
He took another sip. "Guess I'll just keep it to myself."
The tavern fell dead silent for a solid two seconds.
Tosuke finally broke. "Okay, okay. What could possibly be more shocking than what happened this year?"
He threw his hands up. "Three ninja versus four Kage? Clans taking down a whole village? A teenager icing a Kage? Come on, old man. What are you gonna tell me..."
He paused, then deadpanned:
"...that Madara Uchiha came back from the dead and now wants to bring peace?"
He said it like a man who'd seen it all. After everything Konoha had pulled off, nothing could surprise him anymore. Not even the Sage of Six paths being a woman.
Sakusuke didn't answer. He just kept sipping his wine like it was a cup of tea.
The tavern folks looked at each other, helpless. "Don't be such a wimp, Sakusuke, or else..."
The guy didn't finish the sentence, but the look on his face, the kind that says "I really want to punch something", made his meaning pretty clear.
Sakusuke wasn't actually scared. But hey, he had a mission to think about, so he played along. "Always with the threats and the caveman attitude. Why don't you go pick a fight with those actual ninjas if you're so tough? Leave an old storyteller alone."
Now, most of these people had known Sakusuke for years. He'd been slinging gossip at the Tiger's Tooth for ages.
So the moment he said that, they all turned and stared at the bald brute with serious eyes.
'Nobody disrespects the old man.'
That's basically what their glares said.
The bald guy just shrugged, not pushing it.
Only then did Sakusuke speak, and immediately dropped a bombshell.
"The conflict between Kumo and Konoha?" He set down his cup. "Completely over with Kumo retreating."
"..."
"..."
"..."
It took a solid few seconds for anyone to process that.
Then a man with a sword at his hip finally spoke, voice full of disbelief. "Old man... you're joking, right?"
Because no way. No way the most aggressive village in the ninja world would just... retreat.
Just like that.
Sakusuke glanced at the guy with the sword—the outfit, the posture, the whole vibe. 'Yep. Passing samurai.'
"No joke," Sakusuke said, puffing his chest out a little. "And it's official. If you've got any kind of source, you'd know there's not a single Kumo-nin left in the Land of Frost."
He spoke with so much pride you'd think his gossip network was his firstborn child. But hey, that's normal for a professional braggart.
By now, most of the tavern had fully processed what he said. "But... how's that possible? Did something happen?"
These were regular civilians. The biggest news they'd heard so far was that Azula was hanging out in the Land of Water, and Tsunade had fought the Third Raikage to almost a draw.
They had no clue the conflict had ended days ago.
So Sakusuke leaned back, took a slow sip of wine, and started spilling the tea.
"Azula and Tsunade," he said, "went straight to Kumo's main camp. Just the two of them. They attacked, killed a bunch of their guys—and then the Raikage, who'd stepped out for something, came rushing back."
He paused for effect.
"Then he had a one-on-one fight with the Uchiha Matriarch herself."
Sakusuke spoke like he'd been standing there watching it all. "They fought for hours, destroyed a whole forest, leveled mountains and permanently messed up the landscape."
He shook his head, almost sadly. "After Azula wounded him over and over, leaving scars all over his body, she made the Raikage surrender."
The tavern was dead quiet.
"Right now, Kumo's already pulled out. Peace negotiations are happening, but..." He shrugged. "Here's the deal."
He looked around the room, then dropped the punchline.
"Kumo said they'll only negotiate if Azula is made the Hokage."
As he said that, Sakusuke was quietly watching their faces.
The old man had a huge secret, one nobody in the tavern knew.
He knew Azula personally.
They met about six years ago, when she was on a mission and saved his hide.
When he introduced himself as Sakusuke, she said his name reminded her of her future nephew. At the time, he had no idea what that meant.
It only took a day of her hanging around his village for him to realize: that's just how she is. Always talking about weird abstract stuff and always teasing people.
But hey, she left a good impression. Plus, she wanted what she called her 'propaganda team', and she recruited him right then and there.
Over the years, she'd tip him and his fellow gossip dealers off with inside scoops, stuff that made her or the Uchiha look good. And now they were on a mission.
Spread the news about her latest feat across the ninja world.
Judging by the looks on everyone's faces around him?
Mission accomplished.
He took a slow sip of wine and thought to himself, with a touch of sadness. 'I just hope she pulls it off.'
Because back during the peacetime when Hashirama ruled the world and everything was boringly stable, yeah, there was no chaos. But that was actually the most fun era of all in Sakusuke's mind.
(END OF THE CHAPTER)