"Sarah!"
I snap awake, sitting up in bed, heart pounding, sweat slick on my skin. The nightmare was so vivid, so real. I can still see his face, hear his voice. And...
I'm...
I'm shaking. I reach up and cover my eyes. It's not the first time I've dreamt of Eric. Not even the first time I've dreamt of him shooting me, or—
But...
It's... been a long time. And it feels different. It was...
It was like—
"Sarah." A hand touches my shoulder, warm and gentle, and I flinch. "Sarah, it was a dream. Just a dream."
Llywelyn.
I lower my hands and look at him. He's sitting next to me on the bed, his hair tousled and his eyes concerned. His veins glow a soft blue, pulsing in time with his heartbeat.
He's real.
I'm here.
I'm not there anymore.
I take a deep breath and try to calm down. "I... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."
He shakes his head and brushes a strand of hair from my face. "It's fine. I was already awake. I was just... watching you sleep."
I blink. "That's cre—"
He covers my mouth with his hand. "Woman."
I hesitate and then reach up to place my hand over his. I don't pull it away. I just hold it there.
He looks at me with a soft expression. "What did you dream about?" He asks, his voice quiet.
I swallow and look away. "It... doesn't matter." I say. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to remember it. I don't want to go back there.
He sighs and moves his hand away from my mouth. He cups my cheek and makes me look at him again. "Sarah... You know you can tell me anything. You know I'll listen. And... help you. If I can." He says, his voice gentle but firm. "You don't have to hide from me. Not anymore."
I feel a lump in my throat. "I just... it was... him. Eric."
He squints, and his chest glows in a way that I think may be a bit of jealousy. Maybe. I could be projecting... but... the thought is cute. Despite how inappropriate it is. "Who?"
I smile faintly. "Eric. He was... a friend. From... when I knew... Mia."
His body relaxes immediately and he pulls me into a hug. "Ah. I see now. What it was."
I don't think he does.
But...
I don't want to go further into it. Reliving it in my dream was enough. It always is. But this time...
It felt different. Because it... it was a long time ago. I don't... have to wonder why. I know why he did it. What happened to him. And yet... I don't...
Ugh.
I shake my head. "I felt. So helpless back then."
Llywelyn's arms tighten around me. "You're not helpless now, Sarah. You're strong. You're brave. You're..." He pauses. "I'm not gonna keep complimenting you, hetchki."
I shove him. A little. "I didn't ask."
"You did, with your eyes."
"Don't blame me for my eyes!"
"Then stop looking at me like that."
I laugh and bury my face in his neck. He smells good. Like sea salt and citrus. It's completely different from Eric. Or from... Alistair. I...
"I'm going to be offended if you keep dreaming about other men in my bed, though." He says, his tone casual but his grip on me is tight.
I huff. "I don't exactly choose what I dream, Llywelyn."
"Then you better start trying. Or I'll..." He trails off.
I raise an eyebrow. "You'll what?"
He looks at me with a serious expression. "I'll kiss you."
I stare at him. "Couldn't think of something, huh."
"No." He admits, and then kisses me anyway. His lips are soft and warm. It makes me feel better.
I kiss him back and wrap my arms around his neck. He deepens the kiss and his hands slide down to my waist. He pulls me onto his lap and I straddle him. I feel his erection pressing against me and I gasp. I didn't even realize he was hard. But he always is. It's like he's always ready for me.
I pull back from the kiss and look at him. His eyes are half-lidded and his veins are glowing a faint pink. He looks so sexy like this.
I bite my lip and smile. "Someone's eager."
He smirks and runs his hands up my sides. "You make me this way. You have no idea what you do to me, woman."
"I think I have some idea."
"You don't." He says, his voice low. "You have no idea. You have... not even... a little bit of an idea. I—" He shakes his head and kisses me again. His tongue slides into my mouth and he groans. "I can't get enough of you. I could do this all day. Every day. And never be satisfied."
I would certainly die from that.
But it would be a good death, I think.
I rock my hips against him and feel him shudder under me. "Really?" I ask, my voice teasing. "You want me that much?"
He growls and grabs my hips, stopping my movement. "Don't. Tease. Me."
I laugh and kiss his jaw. "Who says it's teasing?" I whisper in his ear. "Maybe I want you to do your worst."
He pulls back and looks at me with dark eyes. His veins glow brighter and his nostrils flare. "You're going to regret that." He says, and flips me over onto my back. He pins my wrists above my head and hovers over me. "I'm going to make sure the only thing you dream about tonight is me."
I bite my lip and smile up at him. "Promise?" I ask, my voice breathy.
He smirks and leans down to kiss my neck. "I promise." He says, and then bites my earlobe.
the truth is...
I end up too exhausted to dream at all the rest of the night.
And that....
Is just fine with me.