WE WANDER AROUND the market for a while longer, looking at different stalls and shops. Llywelyn buys some kind of exotic drink from a vendor and sips it as we walk. I'm not sure what it is, but it smells like mint and alcohol.
And Llywelyn does not look very pleased by it. Though he keeps drinking it.
I end up buying a few things here and there. Some clothes, some snacks, some souvenirs. Nothing too expensive or extravagant. Just... things that catch my eye or make me curious.
One of the things I buy is a necklace with a pendant that looks like a blue flame. It reminds me of Llywelyn's veins when he glows. I don't tell him that, though. I doubt he'd appreciate the comparison. But I like it. It's simple but pretty.
I also buy a pair of sunglasses. They're not like the ones I used to have on Earth. These are more like goggles, with a strap that goes around the head. They're tinted purple and have some kind of adjustable lenses. The vendor says they can filter out different kinds of light and radiation, depending on the setting. They're supposed to be useful for space travel and different atmospheres.
I don't know if I'll ever need them, but they look cool. And they're not too pricey. I try them on and look at my reflection in a mirror. They make me look like a futuristic spy or a space pirate.
Llywelyn snorts when he sees me wearing them. "You look ridiculous."
"Then we match." I say, and take them off.
"I look impeccable at all times. I would never wear such a vulgar thing on my face." He says, finishing off his drink and tossing the bottle into a recycler.
I laugh and put the sunglasses in a bag. "You're just jealous."
He scoffs and shakes his head. "Of your poor taste? Never." He glances around. "Is there anything else you want to see? Or can we go back to the ship? I'm... tired."
I look at him and see that his veins are glowing a faint blue. He looks... tense. I wonder if he's been uncomfortable this whole time. Or if it's just the crowd and the noise. He's not used to being around so many people. And he's not the most sociable person.
I reach out and touch his chest. His glow brightens and he looks at me with a surprised expression. "What?" He asks.
"Let's go back to the ship." I say, smiling. "I'm tired too."
He narrows his eyes. "You're just saying that. You want to stay here."
"I want to be with you." I say, and lean in to kiss his cheek. "If you want to go back, we'll go back. We can always come back tomorrow."
He hesitates, and then sighs. "Fine. But you owe me. You dragged me out here." He says, and takes my hand. "Let's go."
I laugh and follow him as he leads the way through the market, back to the docks.
We pass by many people and beings, some of them giving us curious looks. I guess we're an odd pair. Or, more likely, as it usually is... Llywelyn is always the sight to see. An Akutwas out in the wild instead of... wherever it is they stay. He's never really said.
Or maybe even more...
My gaze flickers up at him.
That beautiful glow of his is still softly pulsing in time to the glow of the fungi, lighting up the edges of his skin. He doesn't seem to notice, or maybe he just doesn't care. His eyes are focused ahead, his lips set in a slight frown.
He's so... gorgeous.
That's not a unique thought at all. He is attractive. I know this. I've known this for a long time. But... it's different now. Because I can look at him like this, and know that he's mine. That I can touch him, kiss him, love him.
And he'll let me.
I bite my lip and feel a rush of heat in my cheeks and lower belly.
I should not be thinking about any of that right now.
I refuse to just spend the rest of my life in bed with this damn fish. I... I don't know what my life...
I don't know what it's supposed to look like right now. And that's. More than I want to think about right now. I don't want to think about the future.
It's irresponsible, I guess. But everything has been...
For so long, all I've really thought about is getting away. Going home. Getting back to Earth. And... then it was Llywelyn. Making sure he was alive. Caring for him. Trying to decide what the hell to do with my feelings and what his meant.
I...
I don't think I want to decide.
I want to spend some time where it's just... where I can only worry about whether my handsome boyfriend would be willing to buy something just to impress me or not.
I... want to try being a normal person.
I suppose I'm not normal. I can't be. Not anymore. I don't even look like myself anymore.
But I can pretend for a little while.
"Sarah." Llywelyn's voice pulls me out of my thoughts. "You're being quiet." I look up to meet his golden eyes, tense with concern. "If you're not ready to go back, we can stay. I'm told there's some river ride we can take at night that's soppy and romantic."
He does not sound enthused about that.
But I am. He even said 'romantic'.
I smile and shake my head. "No, it's okay. I'm just... thinking. But tell me about this river ride."
"Let's walk." He says, and changes direction, moving us away from the main street and into a quieter area. There are fewer people here, and more plants. The fungi grow larger and more diverse, creating a canopy of light above us. It's like walking through a fairy tale forest.
"It's a... I'm not sure how to describe it. It's some kind of boat or vessel that floats on the river, and they have these lights and music. It's supposed to be... a special experience for couples." He says, his tone flat.
"And you've never done it before?" I ask, curious.
"Why s'nilian wo' would I?" He asks, raising a brow. "You think I just spend my nights floating down alien rivers with strangers? No. I heard about it from Master when he went on a trip here years ago. He said it was... 'pleasant'."
I bite back a laugh. "Xilukulkas went on a romantic boat ride?"
"He went with Lady S'haar, I believe." Llywelyn says, and then pauses. "He dates, occasionally. Though I'm not sure he realizes that's what normal people call it. He calls it 'companionship'."
I hum.
It makes me think of Xilukulkas' odd... sort-of flirtation the other day. I wonder if that was what he was doing.
It's weird to think of him that way. He's always been so... enigmatic. So... untouchable. And yet... I guess he is an eligible... bachelor?
I mean... he is very attractive. And rich. And powerful. And... he seems to be kind.
I glance at Llywelyn. "What do you think of him? Dating?"
Llywelyn snorts. "It's not my business. He can do what he wants. As long as he doesn't expect me to approve or be involved in any way."
I nod. "Fair enough." I say, and then smile. "But... do you think we should try it? The river ride."
He looks at me with a skeptical expression. "You want to? It sounds... boring."
"Maybe it just needs the right company." I say, squeezing his hand.
He sighs and his veins flicker. "Fine... fine."
He says it like he didn't introduce the concept to me in the first place.
I'm not very convinced.