Shit.
They're going to find us.
I try not to panic, but my heart is racing, and my hands are shaking.
Llywelyn curses under his breath, and stands up. "Nishi'an wo'! Why now?!" He whispers, and then looks at Mira, who's peeking out from behind the table. "Mira, get down."
She nods, and crouches down, hiding under the table.
I follow his lead, and duck down behind the seat. I can still see the guards through the window, and they're getting closer. They haven't noticed us yet, but it's only a matter of time.
What do we do? What can we do? They'll see us for sure if they get to the ship.
And they'll catch us, and-
I shake my head, trying to clear my thoughts. I can't panic. Not now. I need to think.
Llywelyn is thinking too. I can see him biting his lip, his collar glowing brighter.
Then he makes up his mind, and turns to Mira.
"Mira, listen to me." He says, his voice low and urgent. "I need you to go out there, and lead them away from the ship. Distract them. If they see this ship taking off they'll be able to shut it down. Okay?"
Mira nods, her eyes wide. "Okay."
"Don't let them know we're here. Pretend to be... lost or-"
"Don't worry. I can do it." She says, and then stands up. "Be safe, okay?"
He gives her a small smile. "You too."
She smiles back, and then opens the hatch. The sound of it makes me jump, and I press myself against the seat. But the guards don't seem to notice it. They're too busy talking to each other.
Mira steps out, and closes the hatch behind her. I can't see her, but I can hear her voice.
"Excuse me! Excuse me! Can you help me?"
I peek over the seat, and see her approaching the guards.
They turn to her, and one of them says something. I can't hear it, but she shakes her head.
"I'm lost! I don't know where I am! Can you tell me how to get to the hotel?" She asks, and they all look at each other. "It's the big one, with the fountain out front? I'm staying there with my master."
Oh, that's smart. If she can convince them she's just some lost slave, they might help her. Or they might just send her back to the hotel. But either way, they won't look for the ship.
One of them nods, but they're not... actually leading her away, they're just still there. Talking to her.
Llywelyn growls, and his collar flashes. "What are they doing? Why aren't they leaving?"
I don't know. Maybe they're suspicious. Maybe they want to ask her more questions. Maybe...
Maybe this isn't going to work.
I look at Llywelyn, and he looks back at me. His expression is desperate, and scared. His eyes are bright, and his chest is glowing.
I can't leave him here. I can't just take off and leave him behind.
But I can't stay, either.
What do I do?
"Sarah..." He says, and his voice is strained. "Get in the pilot seat." He moves around me, and I stand up, confused. "Hurry. Before they notice us."
"Llywelyn, we can't just leave Mira-"
"We have to." He says, and his eyes are hard. "If they see this ship taking off, it's over. They'll shut us down."
"But-"
"Sarah, get in the fis'ia seat!" He snaps, and I flinch. "I'm not letting you get caught because of her! She'll be fine! She's good at talking her way out of things! Now go!"
I swallow, and nod. I can't argue with him. Not now.
I get in the seat, and look at the controls. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to work them.
Mira is still talking with the guards. They haven't moved yet.
Llywelyn sits next to me, and starts pressing buttons. "Okay, listen. This will start the engines." He points at a blue button. "And this will close the hatch." He points at a green one. "Then this-" He points at a red one. "-will activate the autopilot. Once you do that, it'll take you to Earth. Don't fis'ia touch anything else, and don't do anything until they're out of sight." He looks at me. "Got it?"
"Llywelyn, why are you telling me this?" I ask, and my voice is shaking. "Aren't you coming with me?"
He's quiet for a moment, "Just press the-"
"Llywelyn!" I grab his arm, and he flinches. His eyes meet mine, and they're full of pain. "What are you doing?"
"I'm..." He looks away, and his collar glows bright. "I'm staying. I can't go with you, Sarah."
My heart wrenches in my chest.
I-
This is what I planned. This is everything I've planned since-
Really, since I woke up on that moon,.
The plan was never to take Llywelyn or Mira with me and I've long since made my peace with it, but he...
He can't just tell me he's coming with and then suddenly-
"Why?!" I cry, and I'm not even sure why I'm upset. "You said you would! You said I'll-I'll explode! You're the one who can actually fly a ship and-!"
"They're not leaving, Sarah. Look!" He points at the window, and I turn my head.
The guards are still there. And now there's more of them. They're surrounding Mira. They don't look angry, exactly, just...
Well, they look like they're dealing with Mira.
And I'm increasingly worried that they're going to start searching for what could have brought her out here.
"I'll get them out of here." He says, and his voice is firm. "I'll get her out. You just need to go."
"But-"
"Sarah." He cups my face, and his touch is gentle. "I-"
His veins glow. I can see his jaw working, his throat bobbing. He swallows, and then he draws a breath. "Look I know this is a terrible time for it but- just shut up and. Listen. For a minute. Okay?" He shifts uncomfortably. "I've. Been alone. For a really long time. Akutwas aren't supposed to be alone. We're not. That's the whole point of my people. We're not supposed to be without a pod. We're not supposed to be. Without. Each other." He shakes his head. "But I am. And I'm always going to be. Because I was cast out. So I can never go home."
"Lywelyn..."
"I hate it. I've always hated it. I thought I could deal with it. Just. Being alone. Forever. And then..." He looks at me. "You came. And I wasn't alone anymore. And it was... it was good. I could handle it. I could be... okay. Because I wasn't alone. But it just made me... terrified. To feel alone again."
I stare at him. I don't know what he's trying to say, but it sounds like...
"Please. Don't say goodbye." It's stupid.
It's a stupid thing to say.
My voice cracks when I do.
He smiles at me, but it's a sad, broken smile. His hands cup my face. "So I. Wh-what I'm trying to say is I wanted. To go and be with you. Even if it was on your little backwards planet. Because I'd be with you. But. I can't. And..." He closed his eyes a moment. "I probably. Always knew it." His golden eyes open again, and they're filled with tears.
"Because I'd make you a target. And you wouldn't have that nice, peaceful life you've been dreaming of if you were with me. And I think... I love you too much for that."
He leans down, and presses his lips against mine.
It's not a gentle kiss. It's desperate, and hungry, and full of regret. It's a goodbye.
It tastes like salt and honey...
And sorrow.
I kiss him back, and I can feel his tears on my cheeks. I can feel his heartbeat against my palms, and his breath against my mouth. I can feel his hands holding me tight, like he's afraid to let go.
Like he never wants to.
But he does.
He pulls away, and rests his forehead against mine. His eyes are closed, and his chest is heaving. His collar is glowing bright, and his cheeks are wet.
I can't speak. I can't move. I can only look at him.
"I love you, Sarah." He whispers, and his voice breaks. "Now. Fly, Sarah. Fly."
He pulls away from me, and stands up. He walks away, and I watch him. I watch him go to the hatch, and open it. I watch him step out, and face the guards.