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Adam hung up the phone.
Time to kick off the full "holiday greetings" tour—starting with home.
Mom Amy, predictably, griped about Adam skipping Christmas with the fam.
Dad Bob, on the flip side, was bursting with pride over Adam's success, pestering him about when The Lancet would drop his paper.
For a burly exterminator dude, Bob tossed around "The Lancet" like a pro now.
No surprise—he'd already bragged to every relative and buddy in earshot.
Judging by his tone, once that paper hit, he'd snag dozens—maybe hundreds—of copies, plopping them in prime spots at home and the office.
Heading out to zap bugs at someone's place? Bet he'd "casually" bring one along, letting it "accidentally" catch their eye.
If they gushed with genuine awe, a 10% pest-control discount might even be on the table.
Then the younger sibs got dragged to the phone by Mom.
They all gave Adam major props—big bro wasn't there, but his spot-on gifts sure were.
Unanimous vote: keep up the good work, dude!
As the chat veered into Mom Amy probing who Adam was bunking with tonight, he noped out and hung up quick.
Next up: Juno and the crew.
No Christmas visit from them this year.
Why?
Simple—they were pinned down in Boston by both their families.
Juno's dad and stepmom rolled in with her little sis, guns blazing.
Even Karen's elusive parents showed up out of nowhere, toting "Mini-Karen"—yup, Karen's got a younger sister, a secret sidekick her folks had been leveling up off-screen.
Caught off guard? Sure.
But Juno's Juno.
She flipped it, soothing both families into a bizarrely peaceful vibe.
Two clans, eight heads, celebrating a chill yet weird Christmas.
The parents, smoothed over by Juno's high-EQ charm, still traded uneasy glances.
Four kids between them—not a single boy.
And Juno and Karen's "odd" bond tying it all together?
Yikes, the tension was palpable.
Right then, Adam's call buzzed in.
His voice hit their ears, and everyone perked up like they'd been zapped.
"Adam! Merry Christmas!"
Juno's stepmom snatched the phone from her, laying on the warmth thick. "Congrats on your big medical win!
You're Juno's bestie, and as her parents, we're so proud too!
Heard you guys hang out for holidays a lot?
Good friends, same field—you should totally keep in touch! Awesome, right? So awesome…"
"Merry Christmas, Mrs. McGough."
Adam's lip twitched as her loaded words came rapid-fire. Oh man, I messed up.
Why'd he call now?
Too late to back out—he toughed it through a long chat with Juno's stepmom, only escaping when Juno finally talked her down.
But that was just round one.
Juno's dad jumped on, then Karen's parents, the Smiths, each taking turns "catching up" with Adam.
All of them nudging him to stay tight with their daughters.
Then—because why not?—Juno's little sis (who he kinda knew) and Karen's mystery sis (who he didn't) grabbed the phone, dying to gab with their big sisters' cool friend.
They knew Adam, alright.
That cruise ship rescue? Live on TV, with Adam front and center.
It ran long enough for the news to dig up his shiny creds, giving him a major glow-up across the U.S.
Teens ate it up.
Thrill-seeking boys thought he was badass—some even considered med school.
And the looks-obsessed girls? They locked in on Adam: hot, skilled, and—rumor had it—loaded.
Juno's sis had bugged her for Adam's number nonstop, only to get shut down hard.
Karen's sis? First time hearing her big sis rolled with the Adam—mind blown.
Both were hyped, chattering away like magpies.
Adam, stuck, juggled their gossip with one phone while texting Juno for a lifeline with the other.
Her reply? "Hang in there."
Ugh. He powered through a half-hour of teenage fangirling before Juno swooped in, satisfied, to end it.
Phone down.
Adam was this close to swearing off any more "greeting" calls.
But then he spotted Peggy, ponytail swinging with little bells, and his resolve cracked.
He sidled up, gave those bells a playful jingle, then hugged her close and dialed her mom.
Cue more small talk and loaded hints.
Screw it—Adam went all in, blasting through the rest of his call list.
Heather and her gang, Chandler and Monica, Matthew and Lily, the Greens.
When he hit the Greens, surprise—Mike Ross was there too.
Turns out, Jill was grinding hard, even skipping Christmas chill to cram.
Leonard, seeing an opening, invited Mike over, tasking him with picking up his grandma from Ellis Care Home to join the Green fam for the holiday.
His excuse? More people, more fun.
Adam saw through it instantly—Leonard was angling for Mike as his future son-in-law.
And he wasn't the only one.
Rachel and Ross, home for Christmas, clocked it too.
Ross was practically smirking to the stratosphere.
Both sons-in-law, both named Ross—but Mike, the "future prospect," was getting VIP treatment, while Ross Geller had zero clout with his in-laws.
The gap? Brutal.
Jill hopped on the call too, gushing thanks to Adam for hooking her up with Mike as a tutor.
With his help, she was confident she'd ace the February law school entrance exam.
She couldn't wait to "casually" bump into her Warren at Harvard Law, catch his shocked look, and hit him with:
"Oh, Warren, I totally forgot you were here!"
Then, as he'd assume she'd tracked him down, she'd flash her fresh manicure, laugh it off—"Of course not, dummy, I'm here for class"—and strut off, leaving him stunned with her killer exit.
Just picturing it had her buzzing.
It's what kept her grinding, even through Christmas.
Adam listened to her fantasy and got it.
Classic female-lead revenge plot—thirty years east, thirty years west, breakup smackdown vibes.
Warren Huntington, you're toast!
(Chapter End)