What was in the cake?
Shu didn't know... or rather, he couldn't remember.
Even amidst the violent chaos ripping through his brain, he tried desperately to recall what it was. But attempting to maintain a conscious thought process through such agonizing pain triggered another, far more primal self-defense mechanism.
Don't remember!
That thing—don't try to remember what it is!!
Did that warning help?
Of course not.
"Hrk—URGH—"
The violent sensation of something being ripped from his soul finally manifested as severe stomach cramps. Intense nausea surged, burning his throat with stinging, acidic bile.
Then came the violent retching. Copious amounts of semi-solid matter were expelled, the very act of vomiting sending a third shockwave of distress through his reeling system.
But the most agonizing phase eventually passed. What remained was an overpowering wave of vertigo hammering his brain, desperately trying to drag him down into unconsciousness.
Weakness permeated every fiber of his being. His eyelids felt like lead, trying to trap the fading static of his vision inside his skull. His drained limbs screamed in mutiny.
As everything began to slip away, Shu felt a single, manic thought rapidly expanding in his mind.
Don't go...
Don't go...
"Meow~"
That sudden cat's cry acted like a clear, ringing bell, instantly dispelling the confusion and fog.
The physiological torment receded like the tide, leaving Shu gasping weakly for air like a beached fish.
But ultimately, Shu opened his eyes.
The back of his hand was wet. A kitten was gently licking it, trying to make its presence known.
Shu definitely noticed it. He mechanically swiveled his bloodshot eyes, struggling to focus on the snow-white, heterochromatic kitten.
"...Rice Cake?" His voice trembled, laced with a desperate hope.
But the kitten didn't react to the name. It just shifted to rubbing its cheek against his arm in an intimate display of affection.
The light in Shu's eyes died completely.
He lowered his gaze, lying perfectly still on the cold, hard floor. Drained of all strength and utterly devoid of the desire to get up, he just lay there on his side, staring blankly at the exceptionally affectionate cat.
The cat was trying very hard. Even with the pungent smell of vomit clinging to the area, it showed no signs of disgust. It just kept aggressively demanding his attention.
Yes, demanding his attention.
It was as if Shu's hand was coated in catnip. The slender kitten licked and rubbed against it, even shamelessly exposing its belly and using its soft paws to gently bat at his fingers.
...
What did this cat do wrong?
Shu obediently turned his hand over and scratched the kitten under its chin. It was the only response he could muster.
His chaotic mind had finally begun to clear, and the truth inevitably surfaced.
What had reduced him to this state so instantaneously?
It was the medication he had bought about a month ago.
Psychiatric medication.
"Live your life well. Stop overthinking things."
The worried, parting advice of his attending psychiatrist echoed from the depths of his memory, causing the hand petting the cat to freeze mid-motion.
Overthinking, huh...
Shu wearily rolled the phrase around in his mind, and a burst of dark, absurd laughter followed.
Overthinking... I never realized overthinking could conjure up so much.
Everything I gained from overthinking, everything I've experienced up until now—
Was it all just a 'delusion'?!
BAM—!!
Shu's fist slammed brutally into the floor. A piercing pain shot up his arm, but the agony only ignited his ferocity. His face contorted, his destructive urges peaking instantly.
He wanted to smash something.
He wanted to smash whatever was in reach. He wanted to shatter his fists against the floor. He wanted to viciously destroy all the precious collections he had hoarded. He wanted to reduce everything in sight to rubble.
But just as the "kick the cat" effect was about to become reality, Shu's gaze fell upon the kitten, and all the strength instantly vanished from his body.
What did it do wrong... It shouldn't have to bear the brunt of my emotions.
Shu curled into a tight, agonizing ball, his entire body trembling violently, like life itself was sobbing.
Why...
What right did it have to do this to me...
...
The night had grown deep—as deep as the abyss.
The moon had run away tonight, leaving only a handful of stars to stand guard in its place, casting down a meager, fragile light.
If a person on the ground couldn't kindle a light of their own to drive away the dark, then that faint starlight was undoubtedly the last guiding beacon they had left.
Shu remained in that curled-up position, lying as still as a stone statue, letting Rice Cake play with his hand.
He still showed absolutely no intention of getting up.
Sometimes, accepting reality was actually quite simple. Because you open your eyes, you look, and the facts are laid bare right in front of you. You have no logical reason not to accept them.
But what happens after you accept reality?
Faced with a ruined, shattered world, what are you supposed to do?
The world forces you to accept reality, but how you proceed afterward is a choice entirely up to the individual.
And the scope of that choice is vast. So vast that it even encompasses "death."
Yes.
Death has always been an option. People are just too superstitious about it, overly demonizing and extremizing it.
In reality, much like breathing, it is simply a direct, uncomplicated choice.
And another choice—stagnation.
Shu didn't want to face the future. The world was forcing him to choose, and he didn't want to make that choice, so he chose to remain right here... But this was only a temporary measure.
The future would eventually arrive, and he would have to make a choice.
A choice...
He couldn't make one.
"Meow~"
Rice Cake stepped over Shu's limp hand. The cat had stayed by his side for hours, and this was the first time it had done anything other than simply offer its presence.
The shift in the world caused Shu's eyelids to flutter. His gaze subconsciously tracked the kitten's movements.
With lithe grace, Rice Cake nuzzled its way onto Shu's chest. It kept its head down, burrowing slightly against his shirt for a moment, and then pulled a small, shiny object out from beneath him.
Shu's gaze slowly hardened.
It was a coin... slightly worn from time and travel, yet polished to a gleam from being carried around so often.
A coin... Shu had no idea why he had a coin on him... Maybe he'd just forgotten about it?
Whatever the reason, the moment Rice Cake carried the coin in its mouth and gently dropped it into Shu's palm, his dead heart finally gave a weak thump.
"Meow~"
Human.
If you're having trouble making a choice.
Then trust the lucky coin.
I will stay by your side, no matter which ending you choose.