The carriage traversed the boundless wasteland. Sparse autumn grass swayed in the wind. Lorne was driving, wild rabbits were scurrying, and a fox was busy scavenging the carcass of a rabbit's kin. Wolf, the fox's distant canine relative, sat in the back of the cart, studying the Gatling gun with a skeptical face, occasionally rapping his knuckles against the barrels. Meanwhile, Luca had his drawing board propped on his thighs, enthusiastically sketching the scenery.
If this heart-warming scene were accompanied by a soaring pop ballad about living life to the fullest, it would have been perfect.
"I think I should come out to sketch more often, Lord Lorne," Luca said contentedly. "Faced with the majesty of nature, my inspiration gushes forth like a spring!"
"I hope your inspiration gushes just as hard when we face the dungeon."
Wolf fiddled with the machine gun for a long time, but after realizing he couldn't grasp its mechanics, he gave up in frustration.
"Can this thing really deal with monsters?" He frowned so hard that the furrows between his brows could have crushed a fly.
As Luca sketched the rolling lines of the plains, he replied, "Miss Yvette said that machine gun can shred steel plating. It fires 360 rounds per minute. Setting up two of these on high ground can control an entire battlefield. I imagine monsters shouldn't be a problem either."
Wolf made a series of strange grunting noises through his nose, clearly unconvinced.
"Furthermore, Mr. Wolf, the reason the profession of 'Hero' declined in modern times is largely due to the development of military technology."
Lorne's interest was piqued. "Oh? Pray tell."
Being asked so directly made Luca stammer slightly. "I... I heard it from Miss Yvette. You know, she's a history major. She said there are two reasons for the decline of Heroes. First, in the age of cold steel, Heroes could loot precious equipment from monsters. Armament is power, and any nation desired a large number of Heroes. But the advent of gunpowder overthrew the knightly class, and by extension, the Heroes. Nations no longer needed sword-swinging Heroes; they needed sharpshooters and artillerymen. Thus, Heroes had to change professions just to make a living."
"Second, in the cold steel era, Heroes and monsters were evenly matched. Monsters would take equipment and wealth from Heroes, which drew even more Heroes seeking treasure. But in the modern era, firearms appeared. The first batch of Heroes ransacked the dungeons with the power of guns. While they achieved massive primitive accumulation of wealth, they left the dungeons impoverished. Monsters can't manufacture guns and can't beat these modernized Heroes, so they can no longer seize equipment. The swords and armor they do make aren't worth anything anymore—just a pile of scrap metal. Subsequent Heroes found the dungeons unprofitable and gradually stopped coming."
Lorne remarked, "That is a truly fresh academic perspective. I stand enlightened."
Wolf rolled his eyes at the young painter. "Every other word is 'Yvette, Yvette.' Don't you have a single opinion of your own?"
"I do," Luca said righteously. "My opinion is that Miss Yvette is right!"
"That's not an opinion!"
The two continued their bickering. Lorne picked his ear, deciding to treat their voices as background noise. He loosened the reins, letting the horses gallop freely across the plains. The horses worked very hard; they felt as though a pack of wolves was chasing them from behind, yet no matter how fast they ran, they couldn't shake them off. This became one of the greatest mysteries of their equine lives.
The carriage finally stopped before a half-collapsed ruin.
"We're here. This is the entrance to the Dungeon."
Luca jumped off the carriage, staring into the dark, chilling entrance. He swallowed instinctively.
"This place is as eerie as a tomb," he whispered. "I imagine many great Heroes are buried here."
He lowered his head, traced a holy sign across his chest, and clasped his hands in a moment of silence.
Wolf let out a series of boisterous, crude laughs. "Hahaha, you're overthinking it. Monsters never massacre Heroes. They just strip them naked and dump them in the middle of the road. That way, the Heroes will go bankrupt buying even more expensive gear to come back for revenge. It's called 'sustainable overfishing'!"
"How do you know that?" Luca asked.
Lorne delivered a sharp kick to Wolf's backside, right at the base of his tail. The werewolf jumped up, clutching his tailbone with teary eyes. "I... I heard it. From my grandmother..."
Luca shook his head solemnly. "You shouldn't take bedtime fairy tales seriously, Mr. Wolf. Come on, give me a hand. Let's get the machine gun down."
Just as he was about to peel back the tarp, Lorne stayed his hand.
"Dear Luca, there's something I haven't told you," he said. "We actually don't need the machine gun for protection."
"But the monsters—"
"I have a foolproof plan." Lorne pulled out three tattered white cloaks, handing one each to Wolf and Luca. "This is an Invisibility Cloak invented by the magic scientist next door, Mr. Ghoulster. As long as you wear it, monsters won't see you, though humans still can. You can use it to safely observe the monsters' appearances."
Luca's mouth fell open. "Oh, Mr. Ghoulster! I've seen his name in the papers..." He smacked his forehead. "I'm so stupid! How could I forget you're collaborating with Mr. Gust? He's the great inventor who created the radiation-proof screen protectors! You should have told me sooner; I wouldn't have gone through the trouble of borrowing weapons..."
"I didn't expect you to actually get a machine gun. But, better safe than sorry. If the monsters chase us out, at least we have a way to repel them."
Lorne gave Luca a nudge, letting him take the lead. Luca hesitated for a moment but summoned his courage and stepped into the cave. He trusted the brilliance of the inventor Ghoulster, and even more so, he believed Lord Lorne wouldn't deceive him. What ill intentions could Lord Lorne possibly have?
Wolf threw on the white cloak—which was so small for his frame it looked like a scarf—and whispered, "Lord Lorne, since when did Bone start inventing invisibility cloaks?"
Lorne replied, "What a coincidence. I didn't know either."
Wolf: "???"
The three marched in a single file, descending the steep stairs into the depths. The interior of the dungeon was much brighter than Luca had imagined. Glowing stones were embedded in the walls, and swarms of Lantern Moths—a harmless small monster—hovered overhead, such that they didn't even need artificial lighting.
The Gloom Catacomb was based on a natural cavern, further carved over the years by monsters. The walls and floors bore the marks of chisels and axes, yet natural stalactites still hung from the ceiling.
"Truly breathtaking!" Luca exhaled in satisfaction. "What a wondrous sight. If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I would never have believed such a place existed! I can't wait to draw this!"
"You've got a decent eye for appreciation, kid," Wolf muttered, unable to help himself from feeling smug upon hearing someone praise his home's decor.
Rounding a stalactite taller than a man, Luca stopped abruptly. Wolf walked right into his back, nearly sending the painter flying.
"Are those... slimes?" Luca pointed tremblingly at a group of creatures shaped like wobbling pink puddings.
Lorne nodded. "This is the first floor of the dungeon. It's mostly populated by low-level monsters. You can go closer."
Luca bolstered his courage and approached the slimes. It was a Large Slime and a dozen mini-slimes. Faced with the stealthily approaching human, they remained oblivious. Even when Luca's nose was practically pressed against the Slime, they continued hopping and gurgling, seemingly communicating in a language humans couldn't understand.
"The effect of this invisibility cloak is incredible..." Luca touched the white cloak on his shoulder, his respect for the magic scientist deepening once more.
The slimes, however, held a different opinion.
"Attention everyone! Human incoming!" Puji the Slime shouted in their tribal tongue. "The Demon King has given orders! The white cloaks are the sign of the human! Everyone, act like you see nothing and hear nothing in front of the white cloaks. Understood?"
The mini-slimes bounced a few times in obedience.
A particularly tiny, light-pink slime asked in a thin voice, "But Lord Puji, why are we doing this?"
"The Demon King commanded it. The human is here for an 'inspection,' so we will only let him see what we want him to see." This tongue-twister of a sentence had taken Puji a long time to memorize.
A few small slimes tried to hop onto Luca, but Puji quickly extended a tentacle and snatched them back.
"Too dangerous! The human will stomp you like slugs! You must act like the white-cloaked human doesn't exist! He is just air! That's the only way he won't hurt you!" Puji fumed, his body swelling into a bright orange. "Anyone who doesn't listen gets sent to the ventilation shafts to eat dust! Those who behave can go to the workshop to apply screen protectors!"
"Yay!" the slimes cheered. (I imagined Sui the Slime Voice)
Applying protectors in the workshop was currently the most popular job among the slime tribes. It was easy and paid well. There had already been several brawls among the slimes just to secure a spot.
Luca soon grew tired of these bouncing little monsters. He continued deeper into the dungeon.
"What did you think of the slimes?" Lorne asked.
"My understanding of them was too shallow. Slimes are interesting creatures, but also terrifying."
"Terrifying?" Wolf squinted at Luca. "Those squishy little jellies?"
"Didn't you see they were pink?! That must be because they feast on human blood! And when that Large Slime grabbed the mini-slime with its tentacle, its color immediately became more vivid. That must be because it treats the mini-slimes as nourishment!" Luca shuddered. "How brutal! If not for this invisibility cloak, I'd probably be on the Slime's menu!"
Lorne and Wolf exchanged a look. Now he knew how humans manufactured such bizarre rumors. One picture, and the rest is all "head-canon." Luca said he had no imagination, but he was being far too modest.
They entered the second floor, mostly occupied by the undead. Within a few steps, Luca ran into a patrol. Leading the way were Bone-Gust and his skeleton buddies, who had just returned from the screen protector shop via a portal minutes ago.
The sound of bone grinding on bone made Luca's hair stand on end. Gritting his teeth against the discomfort, he leaned into the patrol, nearly sticking his head inside Bone-Gust's cranium to see how it worked.
"Moving without muscles... truly marvelous..." Luca muttered to himself.
Behind the skeletons followed a woman in black robes. she was as thin as a reed, with messy white hair poking out from under her hood like straw. Her face shifted between that of a young girl, a matron, and an old hag.
Riding a spectral steed slightly behind her was the Dullahan. His armor was rusted and dented, countless sword marks telling of the fierce battles he had fought in life. He held the reins in one hand and his empty helmet tucked under his other arm. The void above his neck silently revealed the tragic end of this warrior. Yet, even in death, he had never lost his knightly grace. His back was as straight as a spear, and his proud posture made one think a king was inspecting his lands.
"A Banshee! A Dullahan!"
Luca excitedly followed beside the spectral horse. The steed snorted and gave him a dismissive glance, making the young painter almost fear the invisibility cloak had failed. Fortunately, the look lasted only a second; perhaps the horse's sense of smell was keen enough to pick up his scent.
"I see... so this is what they look like. My eyes have been opened..." Luca whipped out his sketchbook, his charcoal pencil moving so fast it almost sparked.
After finishing a few sketches, he flipped back to the first page and crossed out "Slime," "Skeleton," "Dullahan," and "Banshee." Lorne noticed "Giant Vampire Bat," "Gargoyle," "Lizardman," "Siren," and "Werewolf" were still on the list below.
"Let's keep moving, or we won't finish this place in a day," Lorne urged.
"Finish..." Luca savored the word. "Lord Lorne, you walk through this place as easily as if it were your own backyard. Your magic must be extraordinary to have no fear of these hideous monsters. If you were born in the age of Heroes, you might have become a legendary Hero, or a Great Sage who guides them."
"...That's a pity. My profession has nothing to do with being a Hero."
If anything, it was the exact opposite—though Lorne had made quite a bit of money off Hero-themed games.
"It's okay if you didn't become a Hero. Isn't running a game company better?" Luca offered a clumsy consolation, thinking Lorne was feeling down about unfulfilled ambitions.
They continued exploring the lower levels. Luca encountered a group of lizardmen cooking dinner (they were preparing lunch for the workshop staff), a siren who couldn't sing (her voice was hoarse from talking too much at the shop), and several gargoyles perched on pillars (they had actually de-petrified, but had to keep pretending to be statues so Luca wouldn't notice)...
By the time they reached the seventh floor, Luca's "wishlist" was almost entirely crossed off, leaving only the last item: the Werewolf.
He peeked around the eerie tunnels, searching for a werewolf's silhouette.
Lorne quietly gave Wolf a look.
Wolf stepped back in sheer horror. "Lord Lorne, let someone else do it..."
"You're the most typical!" Lorne hissed through the corner of his mouth. "Didn't we agree on this yesterday?"
Wolf glared at the ceiling, his expression twisted in an internal struggle. If there were a god for monsters, he would definitely ask what he had done wrong to end up with such a Demon King. Ultimately, loyalty triumphed over the urge to murder. He gritted his teeth and said loudly, "Lord Lorne! My stomach feels off. Can I head back to the carriage first?"
Lorne took the bait and waved him off. "Go on. I can protect Luca by myself."
Hearing his name, the young painter curiously came back, just in time to see Wolf's retreating figure.
"He must have eaten something bad this morning." Luca shook his head with regret.
"Let's keep looking for werewolves. We haven't tried that path over there," Lorne said.
Wolf, of course, did not return to the carriage. Once out of Luca's sight, he slipped into a secret passage known only to monsters, entering a hidden chamber. Two young wolves—Knight and Dyke—were already waiting there according to Lorne's orders.
"Uncle Wolf, your armor and battle-axe!"
The werewolf yanked off his human clothes and, with the help of the young wolves, donned the armor of the Royal Guard Captain. He hoisted his meteoric iron axe and emerged from the other end of the secret passage. The young wolves dressed as his attendants, following closely behind.
They patrolled the tunnels for a few rounds before "bumping into" Luca and Lorne.
"A Werewolf!" Luca's eyes lit up like a child seeing a birthday cake.
He followed Wolf, scrutinizing the werewolf from head to toe with an intense gaze. His look was like a needle, making Wolf's fur stand on end and his tail puff up like a bottle brush. As a male wolf, Wolf experienced for the first time in his life what it felt like to be "objectified."
"So that's the structure of a werewolf. I've been thinking about it wrong all along..." Luca muttered. "Lord Lorne, do you think there's human skin under a werewolf's armor, or is it wolf fur?"
"...Does it matter?" Lorne couldn't help but ask.
"Of course it matters! Some people really like these fluffy humanoid animals! Perhaps one day, to satisfy those players' needs, we'll have to draw some... un-clothed werewolf art..."
Lorne looked at the young painter with parental concern. He didn't know if there were "furries" among the players, but Luca certainly had the potential to be a furry lover.
"You have a point. We should plan ahead." Lorne said, signaling Wolf with his eyes. "It would be great if this werewolf could take off his armor. Don't you think?"
Wolf clenched his fists. If a rift to hell opened up before him right now, he would jump in gladly. But there was no choice; it was the Demon King's command. What had he done wrong to serve such a Demon King? If he had known, he never would have accepted that axe. What good was an axe? Wasn't a salary better?
A man doesn't cry easily. Wolf swallowed his bitter tears and asked the young wolves through gritted teeth, "Don't you feel it's suddenly very hot?"
Knight replied innocently, "Not really!"
Deck stepped on his foot and looked at Wolf. "Uncle, if you're hot, you should take off your armor!"
And so, Wolf was forced to strip off his armor piece by piece in front of Luca, until he was left in nothing but a pair of thin trousers.
Luca's hand flew across his sketchbook, moving so fast it left afterimages. After finishing the sketches, he reluctantly returned to Lorne's side, crossing off the final item on his wishlist.
"Did the inspiration gush like a spring?" Lorne asked.
"It erupted like magma, Lord Lorne! My harvest today exceeds the total of the past year!" Luca said excitedly. "I can't wait to get back to the company and draw my ideas! By the way, Lord Lorne, when other artists join in the future, why not bring them here for a visit? It would surely benefit their creativity!"
Lorne scratched his chin. "Let's just make the Dungeon trip our company's 'Team Building' activity."
"Team Building?" Luca heard the term for the first time.
"It's a series of activities to enhance team chemistry and rapport. Don't you think a trip to the dungeon is perfect? While observing monsters, the eerie and dangerous environment creates a 'Suspension Bridge Effect,' making employees love each other more..."
Better yet, it would allow monster and human employees to participate together, saving on venue rental fees.
The two returned to the surface. Wolf had taken a shortcut and beaten them out, though only by a narrow margin. He was panting and drenched in sweat, so he had taken off his jacket and was bare-chested. The horses snorted uneasily beside him.
"Ah, Mr. Wolf, what a shame you couldn't see the werewolf with us. Are you feeling better?" Luca scrutinized Wolf's pectoral muscles.
"What are you looking at!" Wolf clutched his chest like a modest maiden.
"Nothing, I just think... fluffy really is cuter," Luca said. "Also, it's quite hot today, but be careful not to catch a chill; it'll make your diarrhea worse."
"...I thank you." Wolf nearly ground his teeth to dust.
It was now dusk. They weren't in a hurry to get back to Norelia, so they set up tents outside the ruins, lit a bonfire, and shared the food and wine they had brought. Lorne even performed a magic trick for entertainment during dinner, pulling a cute little rabbit out of a hat. It soon ended up in everyone's stomachs.
Sated and happy, they bid each other goodnight and crawled into their tents, falling asleep under the starlight and evening breeze. If not for the dungeon entrance right next to the tents, the scene would have been quite poetic.
No one noticed that a corner of the starry sky above them was missing, as if someone had covered a patch of the heavens with a black cloth.
In that vacant spot, the air shimmered, and a phantom eyeball slowly emerged. it stared straight down at the tents below, as if trying to sear the image into its retina.
Two muffled whispers came from the void.
"That's Lorne Dungeon? You're sure?" a shrill, high-pitched female voice asked.
"No mistake. My Mentor has ordered me to monitor him for a long time. His shop is protected by a magical field; I couldn't probe anything. Only today, when they left the city, could I deploy the Eye of Observation." Another deep male voice replied.
The female voice said, "They went into the Gloom Catacomb! And came out unscathed! Do you know what they did inside?"
"If my detection magic could breach the dungeon's barrier, would I still be putting up with that old man's temper?" the male voice said. "That's the Demon King's domain! Being able to use the Eye of Observation this close is already an achievement! Anyone else wouldn't be able to get within five miles!"
"Calm down, dear, I didn't mean to blame you. I just want to say, if Lorne Dungeon can return from the Gloom Catacomb in one piece, it means his magical power is far stronger than we imagined. He's no street magician; he's a professional! But I can't think of any place or school that could produce a mage as excellent as us—perhaps, more excellent than us." The female voice pondered for a moment. "Are you going to report this to the Mentor?"
"I'm still thinking... Wait, what is that?!"
Meanwhile, at the camp on the ground.
Luca woke from his sleep, blinked his bleary eyes, and asked sleepily, "Lord Lorne?"
Lorne put on his jacket and said softly, "I'm going to go drain the lizard."
Luca hummed a few times and rolled over back to sleep.
Lorne pulled back the tent flap and looked at the night sky. To an ordinary person, the sky held only countless stars shining like crushed diamonds. But to someone like Lorne, who manipulated magic, the Eye of Observation in the sky was as obvious as a disco ball.
Though he didn't know who was bored enough to spy on him, Lorne didn't have the habit of exposing his privacy to others.
Now that the dungeon was brimming with magic, he could use magic as he pleased. He snapped his fingers, spreading a hemispherical barrier over the area, covering the camp and the dungeon entrance to block the Eye's detection. Then, he set an auto-playing illusion on the surface of the barrier.
Then he yawned, returned to the tent, crawled into his soft sleeping bag, and began dreaming of his new game becoming a bestseller.
"What... what is that thing?" The male voice in the void let out a confused mumble.
"What do you see?" the female voice asked tensely.
"The space above the dungeon is suddenly covered by a strange image! I think it's a barrier used for concealment. But I've never seen the images on it... The ocean, waves, a rock... the rock shatters, and a monkey hops out. It's so happy... now there are many monkeys, hopping, screaming, dancing..."
The female voice said sharply, "Stop the spell! That's an illusion! It's a mental attack! Once you get sucked in, your brain will be controlled! Stop now!"
The phantom eyeball suddenly jerked violently, bloodshot veins spreading across the white like a spiderweb. Its pupil constricted sharply, then dilated. With a pop, the eyeball burst into countless fine particles, scattering in the wind.
In a distant place, the caster slumped to the ground. Because he had forcibly severed the magic, he suffered a magical backlash. His brain buzzed, as if someone had struck his temples with a sledgehammer, making his mind boil.
"Are you okay?" the shrill-voiced woman asked.
"I'll probably have a headache all day..." The man winced in pain. "You're lucky you didn't see that illusion. It was incredible—so clear, so lifelike, so... I really want to know what happens to the monkey..."
"Listen to yourself!" the woman snapped. "Your mind has already been twisted! Wake up!"
The man rubbed his temples, trying to find a shred of reason through the pain. "It must have been the Demon King of the Gloom Catacomb. We encroached on his domain, so he used such a terrible illusion to retaliate!"
He panted for a long while before recovering his breath. "If Lorne Dungeon could return unscathed from a monster like that, it means..." He trailed off. Though he didn't finish the sentence, his clever friend already understood.
It meant that Lorne Dungeon's power was enough to rival the Demon King. At the very least, his mental fortitude was strong enough to withstand the Demon King's illusory attacks.
In the past, that was something only Heroes blessed by the gods could achieve.
"Are you reporting this to the Mentor?" the woman asked.
"No. Quite the opposite." The man's voice trembled slightly, half from fear and half from excitement. "Maybe we've finally found this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Go notify Meyer!"