Whoosh!!!!!!!!!
A bolster pillow, now a nasty shade of grayish-brown, zoomed past like a bullet. It almost smacked Kara right in the face if he hadn't ducked just in time.
Seriously, that thing smelled like socks that hadn't been washed for two centuries.
The bolster slammed into the wall behind him with a loud THUD, leaving a greasy stain and a musty stench so bad it made his eyes water.
"So noisy... I told you, I'm in lazy mode," Rebahano muttered from atop his black cloud. He was lying on his stomach, chin resting on his hands, staring at Kara with super droopy panda eyes.
"What partner? I don't need a partner. If I have one, I'll have to share my lounging space. Too lazy to share... too lazy to meet people... too lazy for small talk..." Rebahano let out a massive yawn until his jawbone literally cracked.
Baskara wiped the cold sweat from his forehead. 'Damn, was that a pillow or a mortar shell?! Tem, how is this ghost's power so terrifying when he's this lazy?'
[That's the 'Inertia of Deadweight' power. He gathers energy from the laziness of the entire village. The lazier he gets, the heavier the objects he throws. So stop yapping and give him a reason to move on to the afterlife already.]
Kara racked his brain. Scaring this ghost with prayers or Nyai Mangkududo's herbal oil would take way too long. He needed something more 'relatable' for the couch potato species.
"Okay, okay! I get it, you're lazy," Kara raised both hands in a peace sign.
"But did you know? Down in Hell, there's a special department called 'The Valley of Fluffy Mattresses.' There are no angels bossing you around, no scary old men to worry about, and most importantly... the AC is always set to 16 degrees. You can sleep forever without anyone screaming in your ear."
Rebahano's eyes cracked open a bit. "For real? No attendance checks?"
"None! No tasks to scare people either. Plus, you get a lounging buddy so you have an excuse not to be ordered around!" Kara exclaimed convincingly.
[What a load of crap. There's no such thing as a Hell like that, you idiot.]
'Shut up, Tem! This is a secret mission!!'
Baskara looked back at Rebahano.
"But if you want in, there's a condition you have to meet."
Rebahano actually looked interested. "What is it?"
"Help me catch the Zipper Ghost in the elementary school warehouse," Kara said, making his voice sound as deep and serious as an old man choking on an exhaust pipe.
"And what's the guarantee if I help you?"
Kara cleared his throat, trying to look cool—though in the System's eyes, he looked more like a hobo right now.
"The guarantee is... you'll be the chillest ghost under my protection. No ghost will be able to boss you around. And if they try, they'll have to go through me!"
[Look at you acting all tough, you deadweight. Talking about protecting others when you're like a worm being sprinkled with salt.]
'Zip it, Tem. I'm negotiating here.'
Baskara stared at the ghost again. Rebahano didn't say a word; he just yawned and closed his eyes, which Kara took as a 'yes.'
"Alright! I'll take that as a deal. El, drag that cloud to the second location," Kara ordered, and Cruel nodded immediately.
Cruel began dragging the black cloud away. After the drama of pulling Rebahano's cloud—which felt like dragging a ton of cement thanks to his Inertia power—they finally arrived at an old building with peeling paint.
Baskara was now inside the Sukamaju Elementary warehouse. The place was a total mess. In the corner, a pale kid with a half-bald head (serious patches) was crying while tugging at a red school bag. The zipper was stuck... on his head.
Nyai Mangkududo burst into laughter the moment she saw him.
"That's... the Zipper Ghost?" Kara asked, holding back his own laughter.
[System Analysis: Name: Bejo. Cause of Death: Idiot tried to put his head inside a school bag; hair got caught in the zipper. While panicking, a kid zoomed a toy car right in front of him. Bejo got so startled he had a heart attack and died on the spot with his head still stuck.]
"Pfft—HAHAHAHA!" Kara laughed until his stomach hurt. "Seriously, Bejo? You died like that?! Killed by a Hot Wheels car?!"
The Zipper Ghost (Bejo) turned around with a pathetic face. "Don't laugh... it hurts... look, my hair is only on one side because of this zipper..."
Cruel let out an annoyed sigh. She didn't have much time to monopolize her brother, and this mission was getting in the way.
'Maybe I should just kill everyone here except Brother? Yeah, that's a good idea. I'll kill them and feed them to the piranhas in the lake nearby. Then my life with Brother Kara will be peaceful,' Cruel debated with her own thoughts.
Unaware of Cruel's internal monologue, Kara stepped toward the ghost, grabbed some leftover cooking oil from Nyai Mangkududo's bag, and rubbed it on the zipper.
ZIP! The bag came off.
Bejo blinked. "Whoa... it's off! Thanks, Ugly Bro!"
"Instead of a thank you, you call me ugly? Watch out, kid, I'm marking you for Hell tomorrow."
Bejo just grinned.
"Your hair looks terrible half-bald. Mind if I just shave the rest? So you don't embarrass yourself while scaring people," Baskara continued, looking at the ghost's hair. He was already thinking about starting a barbershop business.
"Oh, besides the bag thing, I was actually a bit scared to haunt people here," Bejo lowered his head.
"Why?"
"I'm afraid they won't be scared and just laugh instead. That ruins my image as a ghost."
Rebahano laughed from his cloud while picking his nose. "Life's too complicated, kid. Just lounge around like me. Chill, no burdens, no pressure."
Baskara shot a sharp look at Rebahano. "Don't listen to that guy. He's a bad influence. Lazy and unemployed."
"There, there, honey, stay calm. Don't get angry. Think of our future children—"
"There are no children!! My brother isn't marrying you, Auntie!!" Cruel immediately hugged Kara possessively.
It made Kara's head spin, dealing with these crazy people.
"El, let go for a sec. I need to shave Bejo's hair. Poor kid is being bullied by the other ghosts."
Cruel reluctantly let go, glaring at Nyai Mangkududo.
Kara took a pair of scissors from his robe and started shaving Bejo's head. After a few moments...
Ping! The reflection of the afternoon sun hit Bejo's bald head, blinding everyone (purely for dramatic effect).
"Wow, thanks Ugly Bro! Now I have the confidence to haunt people in the barbershop without being bullied!" Bejo rubbed his bald head in disbelief.
Cruel sighed in relief. She pulled a toy car out of her pocket. Don't ask where she got it; she saw a kid playing with it on the way there and "borrowed" it, making the kid cry. She didn't expect it to actually be useful.
"Here, take this. So you won't be startled the next time you see a toy car." Cruel handed over the red toy car. The wheels were missing, replaced by small green oranges.
Bejo was ecstatic. He floated away, racing with the toy car.
"Thanks, everyone!! Now Bejo can scare the people in the village!! Goodbye!!" With that, Bejo's body began to fade away like snowflakes.
"Finished?" Kara asked, unable to believe it was that easy.
Nyai Mangkududo immediately clung to Kara's arm flirtatiously.
"It's finished, honey~ Gosh, you're so amazing, being so good with pathetic ghosts. Come on, let's celebrate over some meatballs! My treat, but you have to feed me, okay?"
'Tem, help me!!!!'
[Nope. Lazy. Deal with your illegal future wife yourself. I'm going to relax.]
Kara tried to pry her off, but her grip only got tighter.
"It seems you've forgotten something..." Rebahano's deep voice made Kara's skin crawl.
Baskara gulped and looked back. There he was—the lazy ghost, staring at him with pure annoyance.
Crap. He totally forgot the promise he made earlier.
"That's, uh—"