No matter how joyful the moment before, when bad news ambushes you the next second, it will hurt.
No prior happiness can hold back the spread of sorrow — unless the person truly is a shameless, thick-skinned wicked woman who simply doesn't care about anything at all.
"Soyo, from now on you be good and follow your mother, all right? Don't give her any trouble."
That was what her father — who had always been away on business trips and buried in work — said before he left.
This was the first time Soyo had seen her father all month. Barring some miracle, it would also be the last time this month. Quite possibly the last time this year.
On a Saturday afternoon, Soyo was picked up by her mother in a haze.
Her heart had already been stuttering with dread on the way there. She had run through this scene countless times in her head.
But when that man finally said those words aloud — when that man ruffled her hair and then turned and walked away, growing smaller and smaller in the distance —
"Dad! Don't go... I..."
Miss Nagasaki wrapped her arms around Soyo from behind, half-kneeling on the ground, her knees streaked with dust.
"Little Soyo... don't cry. From now on, Mama is going to work even harder to earn money. Mama will never, ever let you down."
Earn money? Earn money...
How much of my mother's time will earning money take up? How much of that time will be left for me?
Soyo clutched her mother's arm. She kept her eyes fixed on the spot where her father had vanished into the distance, and said nothing more.
[No — say something!]
She couldn't let her mother feel any worse than she already did. Her mother had just lost her husband. From here on, she would be raising Soyo alone...
Her mother was hurting so much more than she was.
"It's okay, Mama. I'm okay..."
Yoshiiro Chiose's smile kept flashing through her mind. Soyo tried smiling the way Chiose always did.
Clumsily mimicking Chiose's expression, she reached up and used her fingers to wipe away the tear tracks on her mother's face.
"Mama! Soyo will be good. Soyo won't cause any trouble for you..."
But Mama — can you come home more often and stay with me?
Ichinose Soyo bit down hard on her lip and forced those words back down.
"Soyo... hic... Mama is going to try so hard to be a proper mother to you!"
Miss Nagasaki was crying. Soyo was crying too.
They held each other, face to face, arms wrapped tight. When the tears finally ran dry, Soyo looked up toward the distance again.
She spotted her. Yoshiiro Chiose, standing not far away, calling out something to her.
What was Chiose-mama saying?
Probably something about how much she loved her.
Ichinose — Nagasaki Soyo wasn't sure. But she knew that after her father left, the number of people in the world who loved her wouldn't shrink. If anything, it would grow.
Chiose-mama would love her! She would definitely give her all the love she needed.
At that thought, the corners of Soyo's mouth curved ever so slightly upward — even as the tears still rolled freely down her cheeks.
[What will my future look like...?]
Would she stop being lonely? Would she have more friends? Would she be cherished and cared for?
Would that thing — [you didn't do anything wrong, but it happened anyway] — would that stop happening to her?
Soyo closed her eyes. When she tried to look at the future, it was blurry and unclear.
That's just how things were.
...
The first week after changing her surname from Ichinose to Nagasaki.
"Soyo-Soyo! Open up, open up! I'm taking you to my place for the weekend!"
"Chiose-mama? Coming!"
It was the first time Soyo had seen Chiose since going to live with her mother.
Around that time, Chiose and her own mother had gone off to run some kind of business venture together. Soyo didn't know the details, but she could tell the pressure on the adults around her was mounting by the day.
Even Chiose-mama, who used to have at least a little spare time, now had none at all. According to Soyo's mother, Chiose picked things up quickly, worked with high efficiency, and even volunteered for overtime.
Soyo's mother said Chiose-mama was a very strange person.
Her private life was outwardly dull but somehow full — she was either studying some new skill or clocking in extra hours of her own accord.
Seeing Chiose again this time brought to the surface all the longing Soyo had been sitting on. Over the past week, she had only seen her mother four times — always deep in the night, when her mother had squeezed in a brief visit home after finishing work.
And Chiose-mama? This was the first time seeing her at all.
Nagasaki Soyo was swept away by Yoshiiro Chiose. Before stepping out, she gave the door a firm swing behind her.
With a loud bang, the door shut. Soyo's worries and loneliness were left behind inside the empty little apartment.
The first month after changing her surname from Ichinose to Nagasaki.
"This past month... I don't think I've seen Chiose-mama even a handful of times..."
She hadn't seen much of her own mother either.
Mama said something about a critical period coming up — apparently some clueless client was considering an investment of thirteen point six billion yen? Ridiculous. Soyo had never even imagined that much money in her entire life.
Nagasaki Soyo dragged her chair over to the window and sat down. Outside, unfamiliar cars streaked past one after another. Soyo waited and watched for the familiar little sedan to pull up.
In the end, Chiose's car was the one she finally spotted.
A familiar silhouette rolled down the window and waved at her with boundless energy.
"Soyo-Soyo! Come on! I'm taking you to Kansai for two days! Your mama already said yes!"
"Eh? Eh?! Then let me go pack my bag first!"
"You don't need anything — just come with me!"
"Ah! Okay, then...?"
Something that had gone quiet inside her began to stir again — restless and warm.
She didn't quite know why.
She just wanted to see Yoshiiro Chiose.
Maybe it was because Chiose's reactions and actions had never once hurt Soyo. Or maybe it was because everything Chiose did gave Soyo exactly what she wanted most.
Company and love. Why was her godmother the only one who could give her those things? It was... strange beyond all explanation.
Nagasaki Soyo carefully pulled the door shut behind her. She didn't want anyone to see how excited she was — that would be embarrassing.
But the moment she settled into Chiose's car and saw Yoshiiro Chiose twist around from the front seat, arms already open to pull her into a hug, all of Soyo's composure fell apart.
"Chiose-mama!"
"I'm right here, you little sweetheart! Let's go, Little Soyo — it took me quite a lot of effort to get this little holiday, you know."
[She went and used her hard-won holiday to come see me first? To take me out and have fun?]
Soyo had never believed that if one person truly cared for another, they could resist going to find them.
Because if they didn't come looking — what else could that mean? It would mean the other person simply didn't have you in their heart.
Wake up and go find someone who actually loves you.
She, Nagasaki Soyo, had found exactly that person.
[Chiose-mama...]
[She's smiling at me.]
[She's so beautiful.]
The first year after changing her surname from Ichinose to Nagasaki.
Sixth-grade Soyo had started to grow into herself, though she still always wore her headband out of habit.
That headband was the birthday gift Yoshiiro Chiose had given her the year before.
"Soyo! Look! This is the new house Mama bought for you!"
This was the first thing her mother did after coming home from her latest business trip this month.
She led Nagasaki Soyo to Roppongi Hills in Minato, Tokyo — a neighborhood Soyo had never even dared to dream of setting foot in. Unquestionably upscale, in every sense of the word.
[A new home...?]
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