He kept sitting there. Too much had happened in too little time, and everything felt… off. There he was, on scorched ground, beside a couple of unconscious dwarves and a lizard that wouldn't stop grumbling. He focused on his breathing first, steadying it little by little until he almost calmed down—the fight had drained him.
This world had drained him. Maybe he hadn't been lucky with his "choice," but come on… someone could've at least given him a pair of pants.
He sighed, then checked the system.
Because if there was one thing he knew for sure, it was this: life is life… but in games, you always check the loot after beating a boss. And if that thing he had just faced didn't count as a boss fight, then nothing ever would.
Froggy: System.
[SYSTEM NOTICE]
"You have two notifications available."
Froggy: Alright, system… what've you got for me?
He licked his lips. He could already taste the reward.
[TWO REWARDS FOR DEFEATING THE ABSOLUTE LAVA LIZARD]
Froggy raised an eyebrow.
Froggy: Two? That's… unusual.
[Do you wish to view them?]
Froggy: Obviously.
[Yes] [No]
He pressed "Yes."
[Are you really sure you want to see them?]
[Yes] [No]
He pressed "Yes" again.
Froggy: ...
He chose "Yes"
[SYSTEM NOTICE]
"You have received the reward."
A light burst into existence in front of him. Trumpets blared out of nowhere, and the clouds above parted dramatically. Soon, something began descending from the sky.
Froggy caught it with open arms.
[SYSTEM NOTICE]
"You have obtained: Mysterious Mask."
Froggy: A mask? This is what you call a reward?
The lizard started getting back up.
Lizard: What is that, mortal?
Froggy: A mask…
Lizard: Hm… it looks strange.
Froggy: Let's see what it does.
[Item Description]
Mysterious Mask
Description: A mask that makes its wearer seem mysterious.
Froggy: "Mysterious"…?
Lizard: Put it on. Maybe you won't look so hideous.
Froggy: Who are you calling hideous, you tiny lizard?
Lizard: WHO ARE YOU CALLING TINY,
PUNY HUMAN?!
The lizard straightened up, ready to charge again.
This time, Froggy ignored him. There was still another reward left.
Froggy: Alright… mystery reward, here we go!
[REWARD FOR DEFEATING THE ABSOLUTE LAVA LIZARD]
[Claim] [Claim]
Froggy: …Huh?
He pressed "Claim."
The screen flickered.
Loading…
A few seconds passed.
Froggy stared intensely at the floor while the screen took its sweet time loading, giving the ground a rhythmic beatdown with his foot.
[REWARD OBTAINED]
"Congratulations. You have obtained: Sacred Underwear SSR."
[Accept]
Froggy: …What?
Description: Tired of ordinary underwear? Try our brand-new SSR white collection. Perfect for a hero in need. Increases stamina by 60%. Who needs pants anyway?
[Claim]
Froggy: …
A loud, uncontrollable laugh echoed beside him.
Lizard: Under… UNDERWEAR! HAHAHAHA! You are the most pathetic human I've ever seen!
Froggy felt his soul trying to leave his body. He had to drag it back in.
Froggy: M-Maybe it has some hidden effect.
Froggy shook his head and pressed accept.
[SYSTEM NOTICE]
"Sacred Underwear SSR has been automatically equipped."
The lizard wouldn't stop laughing.
Froggy: Shut up, pocket lizard.
Lizard: POCKET WHAT?!
Another fight almost broke out—but they both stopped themselves. The previous fights had already proven how that would end. Why waste the energy?
Lizard: I'll let it slide this time, HUMAN.
Froggy: My name is Green Froggy.
Lizard: A mortal is a mortal. It makes no difference.
Froggy: Yeah, sure, whatever you say.
Lizard: Correct. What I say is law.
Froggy: Right… anyway, we need to do something.
He looked around. Nothing but scorched earth and unconscious dwarves. Then he looked at his hand.
Froggy: Oh—my knife!
He had completely forgotten about it, even though he'd been holding it the whole time.
Froggy: Guess you're just part of me now. Whatever.
Lizard: What are you doing, mortal?
Froggy: Trying to wake these guys up.
Lizard: Why? More mortals just get in my way.
Froggy: Then what do you plan to do?
They both looked around.
Nothing.
Lizard: …I'll help you.
Froggy: How cooperative.
Lizard: DON'T GET THE WRONG IDEA! I'm only doing this to regain my lost glory!
Froggy: sure.
Lizard: What was that supposed to mean?
Froggy: Nothing. Nothing. Grab one. Let's line them up.
They dragged the dwarves into a row, one after another.
Froggy: Alright.
Lizard: Now what?
Froggy: I've got an idea. You see… they don't love me. Too much, actually. But I can't reveal myself as the hero right now… So I'll disguise myself as the mysterious man—Froggy Green.
Lizard: That's your name?
Froggy: If you switch it, it's not Green Froggy anymore. It's just Froggy Green. Not the same.
Lizard: I don't like this plan.
Froggy: You'll see—it'll work.
Lizard: Fine.
Froggy: Now we wait.
An awkward silence settled between them.
Froggy: …
Lizard: …
Froggy: So… how's the family?
Lizard: Be quiet.
Froggy: …Right.
Twar began to pick himself up, his head absolutely pounding. He had only a hazy memory of what had gone down—just that demon and a scorching heat that had reduced him to this mess.
He was in the exact same spot as before, back in the same fiery hellscape. But as he looked up, he saw him standing there: a man in a bizarre, jagged mask, hands planted firmly on his hips in a power pose...
Wearing nothing but a pair of white undies.