Chapter 4
Shadows of Another Name
The problem with healing was that it wasn't linear.
There were good weeks — weeks when Sophia laughed at something on television, or spent an afternoon in a gallery, or texted her friends back. And then there were the other kind.
The weeks when Daniel's name surfaced in a conversation, or she passed a restaurant they used to go to, or she found an old photo on her phone she'd forgotten to delete.
On those days, she became someone Ethan didn't know how to reach.
He would come home to find her curled on the window seat, not reading the book in her lap, staring at something only she could see. He would make dinner. He would set a plate beside her. He would not say a word.
She hated how well he knew her rhythms already. She hated how little she knew of his.
— ✦ —
"What do you actually want?" she asked him one evening, out of nowhere.
Ethan looked up from his book. "What do you mean?"
"From this. From the arrangement. My father's gone now2014" her voice caught slightly, "—and you could walk away. There's no one to keep this going for."
He was quiet for a long moment. "I'm not here because of your father, Sophia."
"Then why are you here?"
He looked at her steadily. "Because I want to be."
She didn't know what to do with that answer. So she said nothing, and turned back to her window.