Zabina
"Mom…"
I'm climbing black stone steps. Each step echoes in a heavy silence. At the top, there's a figure carved in stone: a dragon with wings spread toward the sky, enormous, with eyes that seem to follow me.
Everything is dark. The kind of darkness that casts no shadows because there's nothing to create them.
"Mom," I call again.
I reach the top and see her.
She's lying on a flat stone in the center of a circle of priests in white robes. Their heads are bowed, and their voices murmur something ancient that sends chills down my spine.
"Mom."
She turns her face toward me. There's no fear in her eyes, only resignation.
One of the priests raises a dagger.
"Run," she whispers. "Run, Zabina."
The dagger descends.
I sit up in bed with a stifled scream. My heart pounds against my ribs as if it wants to escape. I push my hair away from my face with trembling hands, and when I look up, Abisai is already sitting on the edge of the bed, awake, with a frown.
"A nightmare?" he asks softly.
I don't answer. The tears come before the words, and I don't have the strength to stop them.
I don't ask for anything. There's no need.
His arms surround me, and I let myself fall against his chest without resistance, resting my cheek on his warm skin, listening to the steady rhythm of his heart until mine begins to match it.
"It was just a bad dream," he murmurs against my hair.
"Sleep with me," I plead in a whisper. "I don't want to be alone anymore."
He settles beside me without a word. I rest against his bare chest, throw a leg over his, as if I've done it a thousand nights before, and he allows it. He's warm. Solid. Safe.
His large hand slides down my back.
"What did you dream about?" he asks, tangling a finger in a lock of my hair.
"About my mother…" I wet my lips. "She told me to run."
I search for his eyes in the darkness.
His free hand rises to my cheek gently. I don't turn away. I don't want to.
"I don't want you to run," he says softly.
"It's the best thing I can do. If you knew who I am…" I stop. "Maybe you wouldn't have me here."
"Maybe I know more than you think."
"From the age of nine… I lost my mother. Since then, it's been just my father and me. We were hunted… I won't tell you why, but we had to hide. No matter where we hid, they found us. Until we reached the forest… my father built the cabin. He taught me to live off the land. When I was alone, I still felt his presence, but those two years were the most peaceful. No one found me… Now the nightmares are back."
"Thank you for telling me."
"Thank you for listening."
We look at each other.
His hand slowly slides down my arm, brushing my skin. That minimal contact burns more than any previous caress. I move closer without deciding to. His mouth finds mine, and this time the kiss doesn't start softly.
I tangle my hands in his dark hair and pull him toward me. For one fleeting second, I think I've definitely lost my mind… and I don't care.
His hand traces the contour of my body. His mouth moves down my neck, hot and wet, and I gasp. His knee parts my legs, and when he presses right there, where the heat has become unbearable and damp, a moan escapes my throat. A sound I've never heard myself make before.
I never thought it could feel like this. This man awakens something wild in me, something that burns from within and that I both want and fear with the same intensity.
His body settles over mine. It's heavy, hot, perfect. His mouth returns to mine. I receive him with hunger, arching against him, feeling how his excitement presses against my thigh through the thin fabric separating us. My nails dig into his broad back. His hand lowers to my hip, gripping me against him with possessive force, and I moan against his lips.
"Abisai…" My voice comes out broken, trembling. "Stop… this… we can't, please…"
He stops instantly.
No resistance. No protests.
He lifts his head and looks down at me. His breathing is ragged, his hair tousled by my hands. There's no frustration on his face, only an intensity that burns me.
He doesn't pull away. He rolls to the side and stays pressed against me, his forehead centimetres from mine. The heat between us doesn't disappear.
"Don't go," I beg.
He smiles.
"I'm not going anywhere."
I close my eyes and listen as his breathing gradually calms, just like mine. The space between us, which should be a relief, feels like the most difficult and most delicious thing I've had to endure in a long time.
And so, in that impossible balance, loaded with unsatisfied desire and warm skin, sleep takes me again.
This time without nightmares.
I open my eyes to find Stema at the foot of the bed. I look to the side, and the spot where Abisai should be is empty.
"The prince left at dawn," she says softly. "He ordered me to prepare you. Today is an important day."
Everything is already said. I must gain the emperor's favor if I want any chance of surviving here.
I dress in everything Stema gives me: a dark silk dress with silver edges that fits my body elegantly, discreet but valuable jewels around my neck and wrists. Now I'm someone who belongs to this world… even if only for a limited time.
Knowing I'll be in a room full of black dragons makes me nervous, but no one has to suspect. I'm just a human. A healer with magic. That's my role, and I must play it well until the end.
I leave the chambers with Stema by my side. Some eyes follow us as we pass through the hallways. I don't lift my gaze from the floor.
I take a deep breath before entering the grand hall. The guards open the doors, and the silence spreads like a wave that threatens to swallow me.
Abisai is at the other end, standing next to his father. He looks at me, and a smile curves his lips. That smile I've come to know too well.
"Follow me," Stema whispers.
I follow her.
My steps sound firmer than I feel.
We stop in front of the emperor. The black crown shines on his head.
I give a deep curtsy, as Stema instructed. My heart races.
These people killed my kind… my mother…
I contain my indignation.
"Today we honor the woman who saved my youngest son's life," the emperor raises his voice for the entire court to hear. "Zabina, a human possessing magic capable of neutralizing kirys poison. Without her, Prince Abisai would not be among us today."
A murmur spreads through the hall.
"Additionally," he continues, and his gaze rests on Abisai for a second, "my son has taken her as his concubine."
My heart races, and I glance sideways at Abisai, who hasn't taken his eyes off me.
"Therefore, I grant her my royal favor and protection," the emperor finishes.
One of his men approaches. He carries a delicate but imposing tiara, of dark silver with a black stone in the center that seems to absorb the light. He places it carefully on my hair.
"Whoever wears this tiara bears the seal of the Emperor of Anwar," the emperor declares with a firm voice. "No one in this kingdom will dare touch her. Whoever tries will answer to me."
The weight of the tiara is light, but its meaning is crushing.
I curtsy again.
"Thank you, Your Majesty."
Stema guides me to a corner of the hall where other court women await. Some look at me with curiosity. Others, with poorly concealed jealousy. I feel their eyes fixed on the tiara, the dress, on me.
I stand still, with my hands clasped, trying not to search for Abisai with my gaze.
Then the emperor raises his voice once more.
"Today I also announce to the court that, following the tragic death of my firstborn, Agur, my youngest son, Abisai, will be my heir and future Emperor of Anwar."
Everyone in the room bows in unison. I also lower my head, my heart beating strongly.
When we rise, the emperor continues.
"To seal the alliance with the Mordur clan and strengthen our kingdom, I present Lady Bamylan, daughter of leader Faguer of Mordur, as the future wife of Prince Abisai and future Empress of Anwar."
She advances with elegance. She's beautiful, with a regal bearing, bright yellow eyes, and a serene smile that seems made for the court. She stops beside Abisai and gives a perfect curtsy.
The hall erupts in controlled applause.
I stand still, as if the ground had opened beneath my feet and let me fall.
Abisai doesn't look at me. His expression is cold, exactly what's expected of a future emperor. But I look at him. And then at her. At the woman who will take the place I can never have.
Suddenly, everything feels ridiculous.
The kisses in the chapel. The way he held me last night when I woke up screaming. The way his body pressed against mine and how I had to stop him because I knew that if he continued… there would be no turning back.
All of that was a mistake.
I should never have allowed those feelings to grow. I should never have let his scent, his voice, and his gaze get under my skin. I'm a white dragon hiding in the heart of the kingdom that exterminated my kind. He's the future emperor. And I… I'm just his temporary concubine. A curiosity. A whim.
The tiara on my head suddenly weighs like iron.
I lower my gaze and clench my hands.
Stema moves a little closer.
"Breathe, miss," she murmurs. "The court devours those who show weakness."
I nod slightly, but inside, something breaks silently.
Because now I understand with painful clarity: I should never have stopped running.