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Chapter 8: The Weight of Expectations
Today was one of those days I wished I could simply skip.
The moment I woke up, there was already a heaviness sitting in my chest—a quiet dread I couldn't shake off. It was the day of the family gathering. A gathering that was supposed to feel warm, celebratory… but for me, it was nothing more than a battlefield dressed in polite smiles.
Relatives would be there. Cousins. Aunts. Uncles.
People who shared my blood—but never my side.
I already knew how the evening would go. They would talk about rankings, achievements, expectations. And somehow, no matter what I did… it would never be enough.
---
By the time evening arrived, the house was filled with noise—laughter, conversations, the clinking of cutlery. I sat at the dining table, barely touching the food on my plate.
Then it started.
"Ah, Auren," my aunt's voice cut through the chatter, smooth but sharp underneath. "I heard you made it into the top 500."
She smiled.
Not warmly. Never warmly.
"Congratulations," she added, though her tone carried something else entirely. "Though… don't be too proud. We expected more from you."
A few people chuckled softly.
My grip tightened under the table.
Before I could respond, my mother spoke.
"What's there to congratulate?" she said coldly. "He barely passed. He still needs to work on his skills. He's nothing compared to—"
She paused, glancing proudly at my cousin sitting across from me.
"—others."
The words landed exactly where they were meant to.
Silence settled around me, but it wasn't comforting. It pressed in, suffocating.
I stared down at my plate. The food looked untouched. I didn't even remember picking up my spoon.
I was hungry.
But I couldn't eat.
---
After dinner, I didn't stay.
I couldn't.
I walked up to the terrace, the cool night air brushing against my face. It felt… lighter up here. Quieter. Like I could finally breathe again.
For a moment, I just stood there, staring at the sky.
Then, without thinking too much about it, I took out my phone.
And opened the chat.
The unknown person.
I hesitated for a second… then typed.
Auren: Working?
I didn't expect a reply.
But almost immediately—
Unknown: Yeah.
I blinked.
That was fast.
A few minutes later, another message came.
Unknown: I'm free now. What's up?
A small, almost unnoticeable smile tugged at my lips.
Auren: How was your day?
There was a short pause this time.
Unknown: Nothing new. Had to deal with someone troublesome.
The words were simple, but something about them felt… off. Like there was more behind them than he was saying.
Still, I didn't question it.
Auren: Pretty tiresome here too.
Unknown: Hmm. Elaborate.
I leaned back against the railing, exhaling slowly before typing.
Auren: Just my family. Saying I'm not good enough for barely getting into the top 500.
I stared at the message for a second before sending it.
I wasn't sure why I said that.
Maybe… because it felt easier talking to someone who didn't know me.
The reply came after a few seconds.
Unknown: Pretty tiring people.
I huffed softly.
Unknown: What matters is that you got selected. Sounds like they're just looking for faults.
I blinked, reading the message again.
Then again.
Unknown: Does it affect you?
For a moment, I didn't type anything.
The wind brushed past me again, colder this time.
Auren: Not really.
That was a lie.
But also not.
Auren: I'm used to it.
I paused… then added—
Auren: And I know I did a good job.
A small smile formed on my face as I typed the last part.
Because that, at least, was true.
I had done well.
I had survived.
And I had made it.
Auren: I'm hungry though. Couldn't even eat properly at dinner.
There was a short silence.
Then—
Unknown: You should eat.
Simple.
Direct.
But somehow… it didn't feel like just advice.
It felt like concern.
I stared at the screen, unsure why that made my chest feel lighter.
---
Miles away, in a dimly lit office, the man on the other side of the screen leaned back in his chair, his gaze fixed on the glowing phone in his hand.
His expression remained unreadable.
Cold.
Detached.
But his fingers paused over the screen longer than necessary.
"Not good enough," he muttered quietly, almost to himself.
A faint, humorless smile appeared on his lips.
"People really do love breaking what's already standing."
His eyes darkened slightly.
Then, without another word, he picked up his coat.
---
Back on the terrace, I finally moved.
Maybe I would eat something.
Maybe I wouldn't.
But for the first time that night…
I didn't feel completely alone.