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✦ CHAPTER — AFTER ✦
Keifer's POV
I shouldn't have done that.
That was the first thought.
Clear.
Immediate.
Useless.
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Because I was still standing there.
Still close.
Still feeling her.
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Her fingers were still holding onto my shirt.
Light.
But enough to keep me there.
Like I wouldn't have moved anyway.
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My hand stayed at her waist.
Not loosening.
Not pulling away.
Like letting go wasn't an option my body understood yet.
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I could still feel it.
The kiss.
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Soft.
Careful.
And somehow—
worse than anything I'd ever experienced.
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Because it stayed.
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Her lips—
warm.
Gentle.
Nothing like the world I was used to.
Nothing sharp.
Nothing forced.
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Just her.
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My jaw tightened slightly.
My thoughts didn't.
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I've been in control my whole life.
Every decision.
Every move.
Every reaction.
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But that—
that one moment—
wasn't control.
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It was instinct.
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And I didn't stop it.
I didn't want to.
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My gaze dropped to her again.
She was still close.
Still there.
Like she hadn't realized what she'd just done to me.
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That made it worse.
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"…Jay."
Her name came out lower than I intended.
Rougher.
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She looked up at me.
And I felt it again.
That same pull.
Stronger this time.
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I exhaled slowly.
Trying to steady something that didn't want to be controlled.
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"This…" I paused.
Then stopped.
Because I didn't have the right word for it.
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My hand shifted slightly at her waist.
Pulling her just a fraction closer.
Without thinking.
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"You shouldn't let me do that again."
The words came out quiet.
But not firm.
Not convincing.
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Because even as I said it—
I knew it wasn't true.
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My thumb moved slightly against her side.
Barely noticeable.
But I felt it.
Every second of it.
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"I won't stop next time."
That was the truth.
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Silence.
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I didn't move away.
Didn't create distance.
Didn't fix it.
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Because part of me—
the part I don't let exist—
didn't want this to end here.
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Her lips were still too close.
Her presence still too warm.
Too distracting.
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And for the first time—
that loss of control didn't feel like weakness.
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It felt like something I didn't want to lose.
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I leaned my forehead lightly against hers again.
Closing my eyes for a second.
Just one.
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Trying to hold onto whatever this was—
without letting it consume me completely.
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But I already knew.
Too late.
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Because the moment I kissed her—
I stopped seeing distance as something I needed.
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And that was dangerous.
✦ CHAPTER — STAY ✦
Jayjay's POV
His words stayed in the air.
I won't stop next time.
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For a second—
I just looked at him.
At the way he said it.
Not as a threat.
Not as control.
Just… truth.
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Something in my chest shifted.
Soft.
But certain.
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I didn't step back.
Didn't look away.
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"…then don't."
My voice came out quieter than I expected.
But steady.
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His expression stilled.
Completely.
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"What?" he asked, low.
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I swallowed slightly.
But I didn't take it back.
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"I don't want you to stop."
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Silence.
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Not heavy.
Not awkward.
Just… full.
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His hand at my waist tightened slightly.
Not enough to hurt.
Just enough to feel.
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For a moment—
he just looked at me.
Like he was trying to understand if I meant it.
If I really knew what I was saying.
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But I didn't move.
Didn't break eye contact.
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That was all the answer he needed.
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His breath slowed.
Then deepened slightly.
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"Jay…"
My name came out different this time.
Lower.
Careful.
Like he was holding something back.
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But he didn't kiss me again.
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Not immediately.
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Instead—
his hand slid slightly, pulling me closer.
Until there was no space left between us.
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I could feel his heartbeat.
Steady.
But stronger than before.
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My fingers tightened slightly on his shirt again.
Without thinking.
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We stayed like that for a moment.
Just… close.
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Then slowly—
he rested his forehead against mine again.
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No rush.
No pressure.
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Just quiet understanding.
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"…sleep," he said softly.
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It wasn't dismissal.
It wasn't distance.
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It felt like something else.
Something calmer.
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I nodded slightly.
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We moved to the bed without saying much.
No tension.
No awkwardness.
Just… quiet.
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I lay down first.
Careful.
Aware.
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He lay beside me.
Close.
But not overwhelming.
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For a moment—
nothing.
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Then—
that same small shift.
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His arm moved around my waist again.
Familiar now.
Natural.
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This time—
I didn't even hesitate.
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My hand rested over his.
Like it belonged there.
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He moved slightly closer.
Not much.
Just enough.
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I could feel his warmth behind me.
Steady.
Safe.
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My breathing slowly matched his.
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The room felt different.
Not empty.
Not cold.
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Full.
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And as my eyes slowly closed—
I felt his grip tighten just a little.
Like he didn't want me to disappear.
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I didn't.
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And for once—
neither of us pulled away.