Wednesday was originally supposed to be exam day.
But given the current situation, rather than testing and checking students' academic progress, the Academy was focused on improving everyone's abilities so that all students could serve as proper heroes.
They were even conducting practical lessons during what would normally be written classes.
On what would have been exam day, students were sent to their chosen agencies to learn as both students and heroes, preparing them to be deployed immediately if recruited as heroes later.
Everyone was on edge.
They all remembered the three consecutive weeks when the Strange Ones had invaded.
People were afraid, thinking another attack could happen at any moment.
But the Strange Ones, as if playing hard to get, hadn't appeared and were only creating tension within the Wall.
Heroes with free time patrolled near the seemingly quiet Wall to ensure safety and search for what they called "Totems."
That was the situation now at the beginning of May.
I wondered if they didn't trust what I said. Or perhaps they did trust me but had no other choice but to act this way.
Either way, I felt reassured by the heroes standing guard to search for Totems and prevent the Wall's collapse, without me even having to ask.
The cool air now existed only in the evenings.
May's sunlight was warm, but standing in it for too long made you sweat.
And once again, I had achieved the remarkable record of being ranked last in the previous exam.
It wasn't surprising. It couldn't be helped.
Since I couldn't perform properly in the practical exams, being ranked last was inevitable.
I felt like I could do better if I really tried, but I didn't.
It wasn't that my conscience bothered me about using my cheat-like prosthetic arm to get good grades.
I just didn't want to risk losing control and putting myself and others in danger.
Furthermore, I didn't want my classmates to know that my limbs weren't normal.
I had reached a state of acceptance about it.
And my attention was focused more on the Strange Ones than on studying.
What use were exams when I didn't know when I might die?
As I was worrying about various things with slumped shoulders, Yoon Ha-min glanced at me from the side.
The agency had divided us into pairs for patrol, with the purpose of finding objects related to the Strange Ones.
For better or worse, my stepping forward that time had injected information into this place.
As a result, an unprecedented tension flowed within the Wall.
The Strange Ones had attacked earlier than in the original story,
And we had defended against them earlier than in the original story.
They say a butterfly's wing flap can create a typhoon on the other side of the world—I wondered if this was what that felt like.
"...Why are you looking at me like that?"
I tilted my head and looked toward Ha-min.
He seemed flustered at first but soon gathered his thoughts and spoke.
"No, it's just... I was wondering if you're okay."
"About what?"
"You deliberately didn't use your ability during the last exam, right?"
At those words, I stared blankly at him for a moment before looking back.
There was no need to ask how he knew. Having been with Ha-min constantly, he knew my circumstances better than anyone.
There was no way to hide it, so I sighed and nodded in response to his question.
"Yeah, that's right."
"Why did you do that?"
"If I make a mistake, it would cause trouble for a lot of people."
As I said this, I slightly raised my hand.
The hand in my view looked human-shaped, but I couldn't forget the mechanical existence hidden beneath that skin.
Mechanical arms, mechanical legs. There was no need to reveal such secrets that neither teachers nor students knew about, and I didn't want to risk getting electrocuted or something similar because of it.
"...Is it the same principle as when I help you wash?"
"Maybe...? I should practice controlling it better sometime."
I said this and lowered my hand again.
When would the Strange Ones come? When would the Wall collapse? When would I be taken? I had feared and worried about these questions countless times, and I could feel myself growing more tired.
But I had never thought that I wanted to be taken away just to get it over with.
I only hoped the situation would improve. But could it improve?
That was another problem in itself.
Ha-min made a "hmm" sound and lightly grabbed my arm with his fingertips.
I stumbled slightly. It happened because Ha-min had grabbed the sleeve of my blazer and stopped.
"Huh?" I turned to look at him, and Ha-min had his head slightly bowed.
His other hand was pressed tightly against his side, clenched and trembling.
"Um, since we've already come this far, do you want to do it here?"
"Huh?"
"Another team might find the Totem anyway."
I was surprised to hear Ha-min say such things, as I had been seeing unexpected sides of him lately.
"What if it's in the area we're supposed to patrol?"
I tried to persuade Ha-min and started walking forward again.
This time, Ha-min was convinced by my voice and followed along.
He released my sleeve and started walking steadily again.
Ha-min groaned softly before carefully opening his mouth.
"I don't know how things ended up like this."
His voice sounded somewhat resigned.
It was a tone that seemed to declare that he no longer understood.
"...Honestly, I'm scared. I used to think only about protecting myself and others, but now it's not so easy to do that."
He muttered while looking up at the Wall.
He seemed worried that this Wall could collapse at any moment.
"Beyond this Wall is unrefined mana that we can't easily accept. I think it's amazing how you managed to survive in such a place."
He threw a compliment at me, suggesting I was remarkable.
The praise was so sudden that I made an ambiguous expression, not knowing how to react.
Neither smiling nor frowning—that awkward expression in between.
That stupid expression where my facial muscles had given up moving.
"I'm worried because they say the Wall could collapse at any time, and if it does, the Strange Ones might come looking for you, or they might mention your connection in front of others. That might please the Strange Ones, but you would..."
Ha-min said this and then frowned, swallowing his words.
It seemed he couldn't bring himself to say, "You would die without any guarantee for your future."
I would feel the same way. Standing beside him, I was like someone with a terminal illness whose lifespan was determined by external forces.
"They came saying they had a connection with you, and if hundreds or thousands of people die because of that, I don't think I could bear it either. It feels like they're taking away your place one by one."
Hearing those words, I could keenly feel how my position was becoming increasingly precarious.
Ah, I see. Now there's virtually no place for me to stand.
Thinking about it that way actually made me feel more at ease.
Of course, I didn't want to die. I didn't want to give up either.
But seeing the surroundings that were increasingly tightening around my neck, I thought I should do as much as I could before it was too late.
So I was left with the thought that I should hurry a little.
"Really?"
I responded to Ha-min's voice.
Then I noticed his expression, waiting for what I would say next.
So I continued, responding to that expression.
"I think so too."
Ha-min's eyes shook violently.
It seemed he couldn't control the emotional torrent surging like waves.
I guess that wasn't the answer he was hoping for.
But there was nothing I could do about it.
"Will I be here next year? No, will I make it through the summer? Will I be here next month? Next week?"
I speculated about the time given to my future, reducing it one by one.
Ha-min seemed to want to say something about the chunks of time being cut away.
"Even tomorrow isn't guaranteed. And that's the same for everyone else. That's just the mindset we live with."
I was telling Ha-min to be strong.
He is the pillar of this world.
Yoon Ha-min alone is the true hero of this world.
While others received the title of hero and worked like civil servants,
He alone stood as a true hero.
The hero who would save the world and humanity.
In the future I knew, despite standing up, he couldn't accomplish that.
That's why I bet on a future I didn't know.
So this time, I hoped that in this world at least, he would achieve what he wanted and protect what he wished to protect.
For that to happen, he needed to become the strongest.
"I..."
I'm someone who has already died once.
And someone who will die again.
Even if this newly given fate is like this, I don't consider it a tragedy.
"I..."
If you could draw an ending I haven't seen.
If you could smile a happy smile I haven't seen.
I really wanted to see that.
But I had to swallow those words, fearing they would bind him to me.
After painfully swallowing those words, I shrugged my shoulders and blurted out something to cover up what I had almost said.
"I just want you to be happy. I'm saying it'll be hard for you if you worry too much about me."
Well, at least that wasn't a lie.