"Don't you think going to the market is unnecessary, especially now that we have enough supply for the time being?" Mother Lilith tried to persuade Hanabi.
After the bountiful harvest, when he accidentally found the carcass of a dead creature, he was told he could receive any reward, as long as it was something they were capable of giving.
"I appreciate the offer Mother Lilith. For that, I wish to continue working my chore by going to the market." Despite the tempting offer, Hanabi remained unchanged.
Even Mother Lilith seemed surprised by his answer, judging from how she perceived it.
As they talked in her office, with her trying to convince him to stay, Hanabi understood that she was simply being protective. Even so, there was something he wanted to do, something he could only accomplish outside the orphanage, and because of that he knew he could not stay.
If Mother Lilith had a weak side, it was being forceful toward other people. She had little to no talent for it, something even Hanabi had noticed.
Instead, she opened one of her cabinets and took something out. As Hanabi saw what she retrieved, the item appeared to be a small book or perhaps a journal, a very old-looking one.
"I had a friend a long time ago who passed away. She used to have a friend who was obsessed with searching for any magic that could make a single person's daily life better."
Confused but not lost, Hanabi remained still and listened.
"Before the end of her life, she gave me this book, which seems to contain a spell of some kind," she muttered.
"What happened to the friend of your friend?" he asked out of curiosity.
"She died after being bitten by a venomous reptile," she answered.
Hanabi felt a little regret for asking.
Right after she placed it on the table, she immediately slid it toward him and let go.
"Take it. You can have it." It was a rather blunt way of giving something.
"What am I going to do with this?" Mother Lilith was someone very difficult to lie to, and Hanabi knew he could not react too strongly, to say the least. He knew he had to act carefully around her so he could continue pretending without being found out.
"It's your reward. A magic book written in a foreign language, so I doubt it would be useful to you. But magic items sell at a high price. One day, once you grow up and become independent, you will need it," she answered.
Hanabi said nothing and grabbed the book. At that moment, in a glance that lasted less than a second, he suddenly felt a shift in her emotion when he took his reward. Even in that brief moment, Hanabi sensed Mother Lilith's sadness. But he ignored it, because a child could rarely do anything about such things.
As he began to leave, she stopped him for the last time.
"Are you going to the market again?" she asked.
"Yes," he replied bluntly.
As Mother Lilith opened the cabinet under her table and took something out, Hanabi saw a tied pile of envelopes that appeared to be letters, something that also seemed very important.
"You know that mailbox located within the guild zone, right?" Mother Lilith asked, seemingly about to give him another task.
"Yes, it's close to the Merchant Guild building."
"Deliver this." And the order was made. As usual, he accepted plainly and without hesitation.
As Hanabi slowly closed the door behind him.
"So you have gone there," Mother Lilith added for the last time.
Hanabi suddenly remembered that he had been forbidden from going beyond the market. Nervousness spread through his body as he walked away, wishing not to be punished. He had unknowingly slipped, and immediately regretted it.
The last time he was in the cave, Hanabi struggled to control the flow of his energy. Despite seemingly making commendable progress, especially for someone training through self-study, his doubts only grew day by day, as he became impatient for not having a clear vision of his efforts.
Not wanting anxiety to overcome him, he had no choice but to consult the book about his struggle.
"Can you help me with this training? I struggle a lot with it. At least give me some advice, even just a little."
The book replied.
NOTE:
The current training has two subparts. The current exercise is being followed according to chronological order.
ADDITION:
Individual Hanabi has above-minimum energy output. Performing both sub-trainings at the same time does not violate the flow.
ADDITIONAL TRAINING:
Energy constriction. The energy flow will be compressed within and around the person.
The response did not help him at all, nor did he understand its intention. Strangely enough, he noticed how he had already grown instinctively used to the book's seemingly insensitive replies.
"What do you mean?" Losing hope for emotional support, he at least expected that there would be some gain from what it said.
The book drew a circle on its page, just as it had done before.
NOTE:
Put the palm inside the middle of the circle to continue.
Deep down, Hanabi knew that he was emotionally exhausted to think and worry too much about the matter. After thinking about it briefly, he gave up on overthinking and decided he wanted the matter to be done immediately.
As he was about to place his palm on the circle, he suddenly remembered the first time he had done such a thing. He remembered being pushed from within, the numbness in his palm, the pain spreading through his nerves. Thinking back on it now, he realized he had relied too much on those memories. Feeling somewhat pathetic from that realization, he tried to think of a better method of training for energy control.
However, things immediately escalated.
The moment he placed his palm on the page, the sensations returned. Numbness spread through his entire arm, and the feeling of being stuck returned, something he had grown far too familiar with. In addition to the uneasiness he felt, he noticed that his energy flow was being compressed around his body. As the seconds passed, the energy within him was forcefully compacted more and more.
As he watched in sudden anxiety, he felt it becoming harder and harder to breathe.
He was not sure what to do, except to gamble all his trust on the book. While feeling as if he was drowning in his own energy, he closed his eyes. His consciousness slowly weakened.
The method was harsher than ever before.
To say the least, by the time the book had finished, he was already lying on the floor, slowly losing consciousness like prey that had barely escaped a predator.
The boy stood before the eyes of his competitors, his fellow students. After many battles of academics, he stood at the top, now facing everyone while giving a speech.
The fragile peace the leaders had worked so hard to protect had finally come to an end. Chaos and war threatened the families people loved, which led him to join the military, especially after the elders persuaded him to do so. His dream of a safe working environment had now come to an end.
For him, math was easy. Numbers, symbols, and even letters came together naturally. He could solve them quickly.
But war did not care about such things. All one needed was resolve and bravery to charge forward in front of exploding allies and collapsing infrastructure.
He knew a lot about science. Chemistry, biology, astronomy, you name it. He knew a great deal about it. But it only made him fragile and prone to overthinking. No matter how much someone knew about such subjrct, there was nothing he could do for his allies as he watched them collapse lifeless, bathing in their own blood.
Intelligence could never ease the pain he felt. The hunger and exhaustion he endured.
Day after day he fought, was hurt, fired his weapon, ran, retreated, and returned again and again.
Only for what?
During the war he heard that his family had been killed after the town they lived in was ambushed at night. His loss could never be replaced by knowledge or understanding.
He fought, retreated, and fought again.
Only to lose the war and be stripped of everything he had left.
He lost, was captured, imprisoned, and eventually freed into a world where he no longer had anyone to return to.
Too much sacrifice, yet he gained nothing.
Only loss.