Chapter 86 – Almosts
Campus was louder than usual that morning.
Group discussions.
Footsteps.
People rushing between classes.
Normal university chaos.
---
But for JJ—
something felt slightly off.
---
She had been fine at breakfast.
Even walked out with Care normally.
But halfway through campus—
her steps slowed.
---
"…wait," she muttered softly.
Her hand went to her head.
A sharp wave of dizziness hit her suddenly.
---
The world tilted slightly.
---
JJ stumbled.
Just a little.
But enough.
---
And instantly—
someone caught her.
---
"Don't move, JJ."
---
The voice was sharp.
Immediate.
Terrified in a way it tried to hide.
---
Keifer.
---
JJ froze instantly.
Not because she recognized him.
But because something in his tone felt… too familiar.
---
Her eyes narrowed slightly.
"…how do you know my body like that?"
---
Silence.
---
That one sentence stopped everything.
---
People around them froze too.
Aries.
Percy.
Yuri.
Even Felix.
---
Keifer's grip tightened for half a second.
Then—
he realized what he just did.
---
Too fast.
Too instinctive.
Too exposed.
---
He slowly loosened his hold.
But didn't step back immediately.
Like letting go would do something irreversible.
---
JJ was still slightly unsteady.
Confused.
Looking at him now differently.
---
"…you always do that," she muttered.
Not accusing.
Just noticing.
---
Keifer didn't answer.
Because if he did—
he would break.
---
The Collapse
Care appeared from behind the corridor instantly.
"What happened?"
---
Percy spoke first.
"She almost fainted."
---
Yuri added quickly:
"Dizziness. Sudden."
---
Care's expression changed immediately.
"Medical room. Now."
---
Within seconds—
everything shifted.
---
Keifer immediately stepped closer again.
Carefully supporting JJ from the side now.
Not too tight.
Not overwhelming.
Just steady.
---
Aries moved on the other side.
Percy and Yuri clearing space ahead.
Felix walking slightly behind.
Like a silent shield.
---
And JJ—
still confused.
Still slightly dizzy.
Still aware of one thing only.
---
That reaction.
That voice.
That instinct.
---
It wasn't normal.
---
Medical Room
They reached quickly.
JJ was seated on the bed.
Care already checking her pulse.
Lyra arriving shortly after.
Rhys following, immediately scanning her condition.
---
"Blood pressure slightly dropped," Lyra noted calmly.
"Probably stress + fatigue."
---
Rhys leaned in.
"She didn't eat enough this morning again, did she?"
JJ frowned weakly.
"I did."
Rhys gave her a look.
"…liar."
---
Despite everything—
a few people almost smiled.
---
Almost.
---
Because tension still hadn't left the room.
Not even close.
---
Keifer
Keifer stood near the wall.
Silent.
Controlled.
But something inside him was shaking.
---
Because he almost said it.
Almost.
---
Because I've always known you better than you know yourself.
---
That sentence almost came out.
Almost destroyed everything.
---
Aries noticed him.
But didn't speak.
Just watched.
---
Percy whispered low:
"…that was close."
Yuri nodded.
"Too close."
---
JJ
JJ sat on the bed now.
Still slightly dizzy.
But more alert.
---
Her eyes kept drifting toward Keifer.
Again and again.
---
Finally—
she spoke quietly.
---
"…you reacted too fast."
Pause.
"…like you already knew I'd fall."
---
Silence again.
---
Keifer didn't look at her immediately.
Because if he did—
he wouldn't be able to stop himself.
---
Care stepped in gently.
"JJ, he just saw you stumble. That's all."
---
JJ nodded slowly.
But didn't look convinced.
---
Because something about him—
something about all of them—
felt wrong in a way she couldn't explain.
---
Familiar.
Too familiar.
---
Keifer finally looked at her.
Just for a second.
---
And in that moment—
everything almost came out.
Everything.
---
But he stopped himself.
Right at the edge.
---
Instead—
he simply said:
"…rest."
---
And JJ leaned back slightly.
Still watching him.
Still not understanding why her chest felt tighter than it should.
---
Outside the medical room—
Section E stood in silence.
Because everyone knew the truth now:
---
Keifer Watson was no longer just searching for JJ.
---
He was one slip away from telling her everything…
even if it meant losing her all over again.
---
After the medical room incident—
nothing felt normal anymore.
At least not to JJ.
---
Because once was coincidence.
Twice was strange.
But this?
This was something else.
---
Something was deeply wrong.
---
Percy
It started small.
Again.
---
Lunch break.
Crowded canteen.
Too noisy.
Too many students moving around.
---
JJ was carrying her tray carefully when someone suddenly rushed past too fast from the side.
Before she could even react—
Percy grabbed her wrist and pulled her away instantly.
Protective.
Sharp.
Automatic.
---
The student nearly crashed into the table instead.
---
"Watch where you're going!" Percy snapped immediately.
---
JJ blinked.
Staring at him.
---
Because his reaction wasn't casual.
It wasn't normal classmate behavior.
It felt practiced.
---
Like he had done this before.
Many times.
---
Percy realized it too late.
Immediately loosening his grip.
"…sorry."
---
JJ slowly pulled her hand back.
Still staring.
---
"…you react fast."
Percy forced a grin.
"You attract danger fast."
---
Everyone around the table laughed slightly.
Except JJ.
Because that answer didn't feel real.
---
Aries
Later—
during class discussion—
JJ quietly stepped outside for air.
The dizziness wasn't gone completely.
Just quieter.
---
And somehow—
Aries appeared near the corridor exit almost instantly.
---
Not speaking.
Not hovering obviously.
Just there.
---
Watching calmly.
Positioned near the staircase and nearest exit subconsciously.
---
Like security.
---
JJ noticed immediately.
---
"You keep doing that."
Aries looked at her.
"Doing what?"
---
"Standing near exits whenever I'm uncomfortable."
---
Aries froze slightly.
Only for a second.
But JJ noticed.
---
Then he replied casually:
"Habit."
---
But the answer felt rehearsed.
Too smooth.
---
JJ stared at him longer now.
Trying to understand.
---
Yuri
Evening came.
Another break.
Coffee and snacks near campus gardens.
---
JJ picked up a drink automatically.
Then paused.
Because Yuri immediately said:
---
"You still hate overly sweet coffee?"
---
Still.
---
That word hit her instantly.
---
JJ looked up sharply.
"…still?"
---
Yuri's expression changed immediately.
Tiny mistake.
Tiny slip.
---
He recovered fast.
"…I mean—you look like someone who hates sweet coffee."
---
JJ slowly lowered the cup.
Not convinced at all now.
---
Because that wasn't guessing.
That was remembering.
---
David
The final thing happened near sunset.
---
JJ had gone unusually quiet.
Too much thinking.
Too many strange moments.
Too many reactions she couldn't explain.
---
And before she even said anything—
David suddenly handed her a water bottle quietly.
---
JJ blinked.
"…what?"
---
"You go silent when you're overwhelmed."
---
Immediate silence.
---
David realized too late what he said.
---
JJ stared at him completely now.
Confused.
Uneasy.
Emotionally shaken.
---
"…how do you know that?"
---
David didn't answer immediately.
Because there was no safe answer anymore.
---
The Breaking Point
By night—
JJ was exhausted.
Not physically.
Mentally.
---
They all knew things.
Tiny things.
Instinctive things.
Personal things.
---
Things strangers shouldn't know.
---
And the worst part?
---
Some part of her felt safe around them anyway.
---
That terrified her.
---
Finally—
inside the mansion living room—
she looked at all of them gathered there.
Percy arguing with Rhys.
Honey laughing softly.
Aries standing quietly near the balcony.
Felix reading.
Yuri making coffee.
Keifer silent near the window.
---
And suddenly—
JJ asked the question out loud.
---
"Why do I feel…"
Her voice wavered slightly.
"…familiar to all of you?"
---
Everything stopped.
---
Completely.
---
No movement.
No sound.
No breathing almost.
---
Because there it was.
The question they feared.
---
JJ looked around slowly now.
Eyes confused.
Slightly scared.
Emotionally overwhelmed.
---
"You all look at me like…"
Pause.
"…like you already lost me once."
---
That line shattered the room silently.
---
Percy looked away instantly.
Honey grabbed his hand.
---
Felix lowered his eyes.
Yuri stopped moving completely.
---
And Keifer—
he looked like the sentence physically hurt him.
---
JJ's breathing became uneven now.
---
"…what am I missing?"
---
No one answered immediately.
Because how could they?
---
How do you explain to someone—
that they forgot the people who loved them enough to break themselves searching for them?
---
Care stepped forward first softly.
"JJ…"
---
But JJ looked at her desperately now.
"No."
Pause.
"Please."
---
And then quietly—
almost fearfully—
she whispered:
---
"Was I really that important to all of you?"
---
The mansion had gone quiet hours ago.
Lights off.
Hallways silent.
Everyone asleep—
or pretending to be.
---
But JJ couldn't sleep.
Not after tonight.
Not after that question.
---
Was I really that important to all of you?
---
And worse—
nobody answered immediately.
Because their silence itself had answered her.
---
JJ sat on her bed for a long time staring at nothing.
Thinking.
Overthinking.
---
Then finally—
she got up quietly and walked toward the balcony.
---
Cool night wind hit her instantly.
The city lights stretched far away.
The mansion gardens below looked peaceful.
Too peaceful for the chaos inside her head.
---
And then—
she realized she wasn't alone.
---
Keifer stood near the railing already.
Hands in pockets.
Black shirt.
Messy hair moving slightly with the wind.
---
Silent.
Like he belonged to the night itself.
---
JJ stopped for a second.
Almost turned back.
---
But Keifer spoke first softly.
"…can't sleep either?"
---
JJ walked forward slowly.
"…apparently not."
---
Silence settled again.
Not awkward.
Just heavy.
---
JJ leaned lightly against the railing beside him.
Not too close.
Not far either.
---
And for a while—
they simply stood there.
Listening to the wind.
Trying not to drown in things unsaid.
---
The Question
JJ spoke first eventually.
Quietly.
---
"Do you hate me?"
---
Keifer turned instantly.
"No."
Immediate.
Firm.
Certain.
---
Not even a second of hesitation.
---
JJ looked at him carefully now.
Trying to understand him again.
---
Because every time she looked at him—
she saw grief.
Not anger.
Not frustration.
---
Grief.
---
Long silence passed.
Then softly—
JJ asked the question that had been haunting her all day.
---
"Then why does it feel…"
She swallowed slightly.
"…like you lost me before you even met me?"
---
And that—
that finally broke something inside Keifer.
---
Not loudly.
Not dramatically.
Just visibly.
---
His composure cracked for one second.
One dangerous second.
---
Because she had no idea.
No idea how accurate that sentence was.
---
Keifer looked away briefly.
Jaw tightening hard.
Trying to control himself.
---
But JJ noticed everything.
---
"You do look at me like that," she whispered.
"Like something terrible already happened."
---
Keifer let out a slow breath.
Painfully controlled.
---
"You wouldn't understand right now."
---
JJ frowned slightly.
"Then explain."
---
He almost laughed at that.
Not because it was funny.
Because if he explained—
everything would collapse.
---
"You really want the truth?" he asked quietly.
---
JJ nodded slowly.
"…yes."
---
Silence.
Wind moving softly around them.
---
Keifer looked at her finally.
Directly.
And for a second—
he almost said it.
---
You were my wife.
You were my home.
You disappeared while dying and took my entire world with you.
---
The words reached his throat.
Then stopped.
---
Because Lyra's warning echoed in his mind.
Don't force memories.
---
And suddenly—
Keifer stepped back emotionally from the edge.
Barely.
---
"…I just cared about you a lot," he said finally.
The safest lie closest to the truth.
---
JJ stared at him.
Not fully believing him.
---
"Nobody cares this much for no reason."
---
That line hit dangerously hard.
---
Keifer smiled faintly then.
Sad.
Destroyed.
Beautifully tired.
---
"You'd be surprised."
---
The Almost
Wind pushed JJ's hair across her face slightly.
Again.
---
And this time—
Keifer hesitated before reaching up slowly.
Careful.
Giving her time to move away.
---
But she didn't.
---
His fingers brushed lightly near her cheek.
Gentle.
Like touching something fragile he once lost.
---
JJ's breath caught slightly.
---
Because suddenly—
everything became too quiet.
Too close.
Too intense.
---
Their faces inches apart now.
---
JJ looked at his eyes again.
And there it was.
That feeling.
That terrifying familiarity.
---
Like she had stood this close before.
Many times.
---
Her heartbeat became uneven.
---
Keifer's gaze dropped briefly toward her lips.
Then back to her eyes.
---
JJ didn't move away.
Neither did he.
---
Slowly—
without realizing—
they leaned closer.
---
Closer.
---
The world disappearing around them completely.
---
The moment.
---
Their breaths mixed softly now.
One inch.
Maybe less.
Their lips almost met, but painfully didn't.
---
And then suddenly—
JJ's head flashed painfully again.
---
Rain.
Hands.
A voice.
Mutya.
---
She gasped sharply and stepped back instantly.
---
At the same exact moment—
Keifer pulled away too.
Like he had just remembered he wasn't allowed to want this yet.
---
Silence crashed between them.
---
JJ pressed a hand lightly to her chest.
Breathing uneven.
Confused.
---
Keifer looked away completely now.
Trying to regain control before he did something irreversible.
---
And softly—
almost brokenly—
he whispered:
---
"…goodnight, JJ."
---
Then he walked away before she could stop him.
Leaving JJ alone on the balcony…
with trembling hands…
a racing heart…
and the terrifying feeling that somewhere inside her forgotten memories—
she had already loved him once before.