The courtyard stayed tense after Gojo's announcement.
Hakari was still grinning like this was the best day of his life.
Takeru, on the other hand, was very still.
A little too still.
"…Accepted."
Hakari repeated, rolling his shoulders.
"…Let's—"
"…No."
Takeru cut in immediately.
Silence.
Yuji blinked.
"…Huh?"
Nobara leaned forward.
"…Did he just refuse a fight with Hakari?"
Megumi's eyes narrowed slightly.
"…He did."
Hakari paused mid-stretch.
Then slowly turned his head.
"…You what?"
Takeru didn't move.
"…Denial of request."
Gojo tilted his head.
"…Oh?"
A faint smile appeared.
"…This is new."
Hakari pointed at him.
"…Last time we fought, YOU were the one begging for more spar time."
A pause.
That landed.
Takeru went quiet for a moment.
Yuji leaned toward Nobara.
"…Is that true?"
Nobara whispered back.
"…Apparently we've reached a 'history is now a weapon' phase."
Takeru finally spoke again.
"…Correction."
He looked slightly away.
"…Last sparring session resulted in excessive system damage and extended recovery requirements."
Megumi nodded immediately.
"…That's accurate."
Hakari laughed.
"…That's called growth!"
Takeru continued, ignoring him.
"…Therefore, sparring with Hakari is classified as high-risk training."
Hakari stopped smiling slightly.
"…Excuse me?"
Takeru turned his head a little.
"…Alternative training partners recommended."
He paused.
Then added:
"…Nobara Kugisaki."
Nobara blinked.
"…Me?"
Takeru nodded.
"…Controlled ranged combat. Predictable output variance."
Nobara pointed at herself.
"…I am NOT 'predictable output variance'!"
Yuji raised a hand slightly.
"…What about me?"
Takeru looked at him.
"…Already evaluated. Moderate compatibility."
Yuji froze.
"…That sounds like a performance review…"
Takeru continued calmly.
"…Inumaki Toge."
Inumaki lifted his sleeve slightly.
"…Salmon?"
(me?)
Takeru nodded.
"…Limited speech-based output. High adaptability potential."
Inumaki blinked slowly.
"…Tuna…"
(that sounds like a compliment?)
Hakari crossed his arms.
"…So let me get this straight."
A pause.
"…You're refusing ME…"
Takeru nodded.
"…Correct."
Hakari leaned forward slightly.
"…But you're picking the quiet guy who says rice balls for combat training?"
Takeru answered immediately.
"…Yes."
Silence.
Megumi exhaled slowly.
"…That's… actually logical."
Nobara groaned.
"…I hate that it makes sense."
Yuji scratched his head.
"…So we're just ranking danger levels now?"
Gojo raised a hand slightly.
"…Pretty much."
A pause.
"…He's optimizing survival probability."
Hakari stared at Takeru for a long moment.
Then sighed.
"…Man."
"…I lost to rice ball logic."
Inumaki gave a small nod.
"…Tuna mayo."
(I accept this responsibility)
Takeru turned slightly.
"…Nobara Kugisaki. Requesting sparring session confirmation."
Nobara pointed at him immediately.
"…I DIDN'T SAY YES!"
Takeru paused.
Then:
"…Understood."
Megumi muttered.
"…He's just assigning training partners like a system menu now."
Yuji laughed slightly.
"…At least he's alive enough to be picky again."
Gojo stepped back, amused.
"…Alright."
A pause.
"…Looks like Hakari got demoted to 'emergency only.'"
Hakari sighed dramatically.
"…This is discrimination against gamblers."
Takeru turned away calmly.
"…Session begins tomorrow."
Nobara groaned again.
"…I need better life choices."
And just like that—
the courtyard shifted from one dangerous sparring match…
into the beginning of a completely different kind of chaos.