What to do with clowns like these??
[Image Here]
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I ran.
"MR. KAISEN, NO!"
And jumped.
Okay, so maybe throwing myself out of a government jet thirty thousand feet up while handcuffed was not my smartest decision.
But in my defense, I'd just pulled the Gambler trait, and I was riding a high.
Also, I'm a gambling addict with impulse control issues, so this was basically on-brand.
The wind hit me like a wall pushing against my chest, ripping the air from my lungs, tearing at my clothes. The ground was rushing up way too fast, buildings getting bigger, and streets became clear.
This was fine. I had a plan. Probably.
The GDA agents nearby were gaping at me in shock as I plummeted past them.
Mid-air, I activated my abilities.
Steam Emission in slot one, Zero Gravity in slot two and Blademaster in slot three.
The energy blades formed inside the tungsten cuffs, growing with the Summoner trait boosting their potency, and I felt them slice through the metal restraints from the inside out.
The cuffs sliced open, pieces spinning away into the air.
My hands were free again.
Zero Gravity kicked in, and suddenly I wasn't falling anymore, Weightlessness hit me like a switch flipping. I was floating, drifting like a balloon in a hurricane, spinning uncontrollably with no way to orient myself.
Agents were flying toward me with their jetpacks, trying to grab me, probably to save me or worse, arrest me.
I projected steam from my palms like the world's shittiest Iron Man repulsor, using the force to push myself away and change direction, trying to control my movement.
Scalding steam erupted from my palms in concentrated jets. The force was immediate and brutal, and I shot upward like a rocket, completely overshooting my intended trajectory and nearly colliding with the plane I'd just jumped out of.
"FUCK!" I yelped, cutting the steam and immediately starting to fall again.
The rush was incredible.
I was flying in the Open sky, a rush of winds hitting my face, and most importantly, I was flying…I was fucking flying!
And then the panic hit.
I was thirty thousand feet up. Flying on steam propulsion with no training at all.
I fumbled the steam projection, shot too hard in one direction, spun wildly, overcompensated again and went spiralling in another direction, nearly colliding with an agent.
My heart was hammering so hard I thought it might explode. My hands were shaking. The world was spinning and I couldn't tell which way was up.
'Fuck fuck fuck this was a bad idea this was such a bad idea why did I jump out of a plane-'
I remembered something as I pulled the Temperance tarot card from my mental storage and activated it.
The Tarot card glew white and immediately, everything went quiet.
My mind was assaulted with complete silence. Every emotion, fear and anxiety just got... muted and shoved into a box so I could think clearly.
All that remained was total and sharp focus.
My movements smoothed out instantly. The steam hissed from my palms, and I could actually control my descent now. Not graceful, not even close to flight, but I was managing a controlled fall instead of a death plummet.
Much better.
'Nakime,' I thought, reaching for our mental connection. "Are you alright? Did Omni-Man get you?'
Her response came through strained, and she sounded exhausted. 'This one... is managing, Master. The monster is weakened as his injuries are getting worse, but he refuses to cease his rampage.'
'Can you hold him for a few more minutes?'
'As long as Master commands, I will fight. Even unto death, I will drag the monster into oblivion with me if I must.'
'Yeah, no, let's not do the dramatic sacrifice thing,' I thought. 'New plan. Start agitating him. Taunt him. Rage bait him if you have to. I want him absolutely consumed with rage. And be ready to open a portal on my signal.'
There was a pause from Nakime.
'Master... that strategy seems exceptionally dangerous.'
'I know. But I've got a plan. Kind of. Maybe. Just trust me.'
'...This one obeys.'
The connection went quiet, and I focused on the battlefield below.
Downtown Chicago looked like a warzone from a video game. Flaxan soldiers everywhere, organized formations firing in coordinated volleys. Energy weapons firing indiscriminately, and Tanks rolling through streets, crushing everything in their path.
And worst of all, civilians caught in crossfire.
Running. Screaming. Dying.
And there, right in the middle of the worst of it, was Invincible.
He was on the ground, crouched an old woman, trying to shield her with his body while a Flaxan tank's main cannon charged up.
The energy building in that barrel was ready to vaporize them both.
I had maybe three seconds.
Fuck it.
I pulled the tank from my mental storage right there and then.
M1A2 Abrams, forty tons of American steel and infinite ammunition, materialized in the air above the Flaxan tank.
[Image Here]
And gravity, that beautiful bitch, took over.
Forty tons accelerating at ten meters per second squared.
The impact sounded like the warhead detonating.
My tank came down like the fist of an angry god, pancaked the Flaxan tank flat, crushed the crew inside, and the resulting explosion from the crash sent a shockwave through the street that shattered every window in a three-block radius, charring all nearby alien soldiers.
I touched down on the ground, steam still venting from my palms to control my descent, and immediately felt devastated.
My tank! My gorgeous tank with unlimited fuel and ammunition. Reduced to unrecognizable scrap metal in one glorious suicide drop.
Worth it, obviously. It saved lives and gave the heroes an opening.
But still. RIP tank. You were too beautiful for this world.
Robot was hovering nearby, his mechanical voice crackling through speakers, as he landed near me. "...Unexpected variable detected. Please verify your identity."
The five-minute cooldown on Zero Gravity hit, and I swapped it out for Call to Arms.
My energy blade materialized, rapier-like and elegant, silver light condensed into a killing edge. The fencing training from my old life came flooding back. Muscle memory of the piste, the advance, the lunge, the riposte. This wasn't a brawler's weapon, thus the only weapon I was forced to learn.
The Summoner trait boosted it, made it sharper, lighter and more durable.
I felt my stamina drain as calories burned to power the ability, and I felt hunger starting to gnaw at my gut.
But the Temperance card kept me in total focus and kept the discomfort at bay.
A Flaxan soldier nearby was staring at the crushed tank instead of watching his surroundings, his face slack with shock.
In a single action, I performed a 'Rapid' through his eye socket.
The blade went in smoothly, punched through the orbital bone, pierced brain matter, and came out the back of his skull in one fluid motion.
He dropped instantly; the alien was dead before he hit the ground.
As I watched the dead body, I was momentarily uncomfortable.
I should've felt something. Horror? Guilt? Remorse for taking a life? Anything, but I felt nothing.
But the Temperance card had muted all that, and honestly? These fuckers were killing innocent civilians. This was self-defence.
I approached Robot, who was still analysing the dead alien and in the middle of giving commands to his team.
"Sorry about this," I said.
And sliced his metal head off.
The Teen Team screamed in unison.
"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Rex Splode's voice hit a pitch I didn't think was humanly possible.
"HE JUST KILLED ROBOT!" One of the Dupli-Kates shrieked, all of them turning toward me with murder in their eyes.
But I ignored them, shoved my arm into Robot's severed neck, and yanked out the advanced battery reactor that powered his drone body.
The Glowing One trait activated instantly.
Radiation flooded into my body, pure energy absorbing directly into my cells.
The hunger magically vanished as my stamina reserves filled to maximum.
I could even feel my physical stats ticked up slightly from the dose.
This battery was basically a cultivation pill for me.
Perfect.
Rex landed in front of me, fist cocked back, his face twisted in rage. "You just destroyed my friend's body, asshole!"
He swung.
I dodged effortlessly. Enhanced focus, letting me see the punch coming from a mile away. I stepped inside his guard and headbutted him directly in the nose.
His nose crunched as blood sprayed. He staggered back, cursing and and clutching his face.
"Robot's fine! " I shouted over the chaos. "It's a remote-controlled drone! He's not even here!"
But they weren't listening, too shocked and angry to process words.
Whatever. I'd apologize later. Right now, I need to end this invasion and terrify them enough to force them to retreat.
I had three ability slots active. That meant Call to Arms would pull from the Gold Familiar pool.
Time to gamble everything on one pull.
I activated Call to Arms for a blind summon.
The gacha wheel spun in my vision, and I felt the heart of the cards.
'Okay that's cheesy even for me,' I thought.
And I finally saw the roll:
[Blue Eyes White Dragon]
|Elite Familiar|
Yugioh - A dragon of the legends known as an engine of destruction. This dragon, while being very physically powerful with exceptional toughness, is also capable of unleashing a devastating lightning breath and capable of flying at fast speeds.
[Image Here]
And then as if something took over.
Maybe it was the gambling high or just the sheer absurdity of the situation.
Or just maybe it was because I'd always wanted to do this as a kid.
But I threw my arms wide and screamed at the top of my lungs:
"WITH THIS SACRED POWER, I SUMMON FORTH! MY PRIDE, MY SOUL, MY ULTIMATE CARD! BLUE-EYES WHITE DRAGON!"
Majestic Blue flames erupted from the summoning circle that appeared beneath me, so goddamn extra that I almost laughed.
The dragon finally materialized.
White scales that gleamed like polished steel, each one the size of my hand. Crystalline blue eyes that glowed with inner light. Wings that spread fifteen feet from tip to tip, each feather-scale razor sharp.
It was massive. Four and a half meters long, not counting the tail. Big enough to carry a car. Small enough to maneuver through city streets without destroying everything.
Just like the card art. Perfect.
"RROAAARRGH!"
Its roar shook the entire battlefield.
Buildings trembled, windows shattered in cascading waves, and all sorts of alarms went off across six city blocks. I could see the fear on their faces, the sudden recognition that they were no longer the apex predators on this battlefield.
The Flaxan soldiers stumbled, looking up in primal terror at the massive predator that had just entered the food chain above them.
The Blue-Eyes White Dragon spread its wings, opened its maw, and lightning crackled in its throat.
The Summoner trait boosted its traits making it stronger, faster and more connected to me.
The crackling energy built in its throat, white-blue lightning condensing into a beam of pure destruction.
And then it fired.
"Burst Stream of Destruction"
The words came out of my mouth without even trying. Muscle memory from a childhood spent watching anime and dreaming of having my own Blue-Eyes.
The lightning breath weapon carved through the Flaxan lines like a laser through tissue paper.
Soldiers vaporized instantly, armor melting and bodies turning to ash before they could even scream. Tanks became molten slag, superheated metal running like water. The beam swept across their formation in a wide arc, and everywhere it touched, there was only death.
A dozen Flaxans died in the first second. Two dozen in the next. The beam swept across their formation like a scythe, and everywhere it touched, there was only destruction.
The Teen Team stood frozen in shock.
The GDA agents hovering above had stopped mid-flight, staring.
Even Invincible was just... staring at the dragon with his mouth open.
I stood there covered in Flaxan blood, Robot's battery clutched in one hand, my silver rapier still glowing in the other, with a fifty-foot dragon hovering protectively behind me.
"Yeah!" I shouted at the remaining Flaxans. "That's right! We've got a fucking dragon! You see this shit?! THIS IS EARTH, MOTHERFUCKERS! WE DON'T PLAY!"
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