*Ring *Ring
It was the next morning. Issei was getting ready for the embarrassment that awaited him at school when his phone rang.
"Who's that…?"
The screen was lit with Azazel's name. Issei raised his brows, pleasantly surprised. He was also thinking of calling the fallen leader. He had a few things he wanted answered, and if possible, a small favour to ask as well. The timing was impeccable.
He picked up the call. "How's my nephew doing?!" Azazel bellowed, the syllables slurred.
"Oh…"
Issei stopped himself. Azazel was inebriated.
Azazel apparently didn't hear his surprise. He went on, hiccupping and repeating himself, "How's my nephew doing?!"
This was the worst. "Why did you call, Zaza?"
"Hmm? Who is Zaza?" He said, confused. Then Issei heard his volume dropping as if he had pulled his phone away from his face, asking people on the other side, "Hey…is any of you named Zaza here?"
To his query, a chorus of sweet voices laughed. Then, out of the laughing women, a playful and mature voice, and with a tiniest bit of exasperation, answered, "That's just you, Azazel…"
Issei facepalmed. The libertine supreme.
"That's right! That's right! It is just me. I am Zaza." Azazel brought his phone close again and damn near shouted into the speaker. "Hey, brat! Your favourite uncle, Zaza, this side. How was your first day?! Anything you like? Any…" He stopped halfway. A heartbeat later, he breathed into the speaker in a whisper, "Any chicks?"
He hummed. His eyes tracked the minute hand of the table clock, and he only had about ten minutes max. If he wanted to get to his request, he was going to get the personification of hedonism to get serious.
"Terrible. I almost died last night." So, he delivered that news without preamble in his flattest voice.
"Huh?!" There was a small movement of sheets; the sighs and groans of the women, he presumed, must have been draped over him. Then, Azazel's clear voice resounded through, all signs of inebriation gone, "Explain."
Issei felt a small warmth bloom in his chest. He cared.
With a slight curl of his lips, he repeated himself, "Yeah, went out for a walk, and came across the princess and your friend's daughter fighting a high-class, bordering on ultimate-class, stray."
He moved through his room, tucking the phone between his head and shoulder, "Couldn't let barbell's daughter die, could I? But the damn thing was actually super Smart; it almost got me. I even had to use the tear."
"That was your last one, right?"
"Uh-huh," He began arranging his backpack. "Now only have the tape left. So, send some, will ya?"
Azazel groaned on the other end. "You're going to bankrupt me one of these days."
A tick formed on his forehead, "I almost died back there! And you're worried for some change?!"
"…Just dodge then, you masochistic brat."
Issei finished packing his stuff for the day and plopped down on the edge of his bed. He had about seven more minutes. "Forget that. Why did you call this morning? Don't tell me the slacker lord is suddenly invested in getting daily debriefs."
"No way, no way, that's for the paper workers," The governor general waved it off, his voice gaining a tinge of anticipatory amusement to it, "It's just, dress well today, son. You'll need it."
"…" Issei was at a genuine loss for words.
Already!?!?
That word resounded in his head like an iron bell, reverberating through the mental walls. It had been one day- ONE FUCKING DAY- since he'd arrived. He'd already come close to dying once. Already lost all of his dignity at school to those dubious guys. Now, that circus was already at his door?!
"WHAT THE FUCK?!?" Before he knew it, that frustrated shout had burst out of his mouth.
It had been just one day. How was he supposed to shove himself into that affair now? Should he just waltz in and say, 'Hey, heard you're having your fiancé-that-you-very-much-hate over, mind if I stay and watch? Oh, and don't mind how I know or why I want to stay. That's not important.'
"Tell me you're joking, Zaza, please…" He pleaded- prayed to the fallen leader on the other side.
Only for him to crush it mercilessly…
"Nope." He said the 'P' with a pop. "Somehow, the recommendation letter I sent to the school ended up with the other faction. They clocked your arrival and pressured the lord of gremory to push the dates forward accordingly."
"O-Oh, my god…" Wasn't this a little too much? Why were the big shots of one of the largest factions stalking him? There were so many other, much more talented ones out there. Just go shopping for them. Why the fuck would they fuss over a weak as fuck cripple?!
Azazel continued, acting oblivious to his breakdown. "The great king apparently hasn't gotten over you yet…."
"…Ah," of course, it was him. Issei suddenly stopped panicking. Instead, he closed his eyes and asked a simple question, "…Is that a vice of his?"
"Could be." Azazel shrugged. "Those in his position don't take refusal easily. Especially not from a person from an inferior race, not even a fraction of his age."
"Gotcha." He nodded. "But still, why don't you sound any worried about sacrificing your dear nephew to the firepits of politics?" He grumbled in a low voice, standing up and pulling off the current V-neck shirt.
"Well, little bird sounds motivated now." He breezily ignored him, "Anything you want to say to dearest uncle before I hang up the call?"
"Actually, yeah. Two of them, in fact."
"I swear, if it's something that's going to lighten my pur-"
"What are the chances there are bloodsuckers in this town, and they're coordinating stuff?" He asked the first question, and he followed on with the second, "And any chance you could spare another for some clean-up? Anyone from Tobeo's party or Vali's?"
There was a radio silence for a minute after that question. Then he proceeded to answer in a measured tone, "For the first, less than double digits. For the second, Tobi and his gang are busy with their stuff, and Vali hasn't made contact in a long time. Sorry, but you're alone in this, hero."
"…Are you really going to let him?"
Azazel sighed. His voice came out conflicted and hesitant, very unlike the confident and suave governor general everyone knew him as, "…You both are the same. I do not see myself stopping you."
Issei shook his head. "Also…another thing."
He pulled out a navy dress shirt and put it over himself in the mirror, "…This whole lying thing is kinda hard. Half the time, I can't even remember what I said last time."
"…Can't I just be upfront with them?"