"Nathan… Are you doing well?"
"Yes, why?"
I looked away from my book to face the team leader. Surprisingly, he was already sitting across from me.
"The ethics… you are in one piece but how's your mentality? Are you okay?"
"Ah—"
It happened this morning but I felt as if it was three weeks ago.
"They didn't threaten me. Felt more ease than the HR drama."
"That's good." He gave the random things on the table a look before looking at me again. "I guess that you know now about the containment department."
"Yes."
I really didn't want to remember anything about that, but here we are. Opening the black box again…
"An offer?"
"Yes."
He seemed more serious after hearing that.
"Do you want an advice? kid."
No, I want to know why you're calling me kid.
"I already told him that I'm refusing the position. That all was a coincidence…"
"One coincidence is fine, but two would get you into trouble." The look in his eyes instantly gets sharper. "The third will make you lose your freedom forever. Be careful."
That wasn't just a simple talk out of care, It felt as if it was a personal matter in an advice shape.
More touching—
"So, I have to act normal." I put my book aside, ready to make this conversation more serious. "But if I don't know what is the norm, how can I act on it?"
"That's why I'm giving you this." A memory card appeared in his hand. "Memorize everything in here, and act on it."
"This is the explanation records, I guess?"
"And the general way to act if you got into a Vessel."
I took it, flipped it, then put it in my pocket… since using the company's tablet to read it wouldn't be the brightest idea.
"It is time to leave then. Take care of yourself."
He was ready to disappear from my vision when I stopped him. Asking a question that was going through my mind since the end of the ethics thing.
"They will make me go into a Vessel again, somehow?"
"I don't know. But since it's their way to test things, you can imagine anything."
"Even if it is illegal?"
"As far as nobody knows, it is happening."
"..."
So, they would do it.
It was a matter of time before finding myself in their trap.
"Just don't over think it."
"I'm very good at that. The problem is how to actually get myself to think about it."
"At least read what I gave you. Then let things happen the way they are." he gave me a very small smile. "Just remember… Blending in is the safest way to survive here."
"Understood."
He just disappeared after saying goodbye, and I began to put my things in the bag. Ready to leave after him.
For various reasons, this was the first time I felt as if my ignorance was finally making me fearful.
"I'm being ignorant because I want to leave this in weeks, but what could that do to me if I didn't make it to that time?"
Now, that was a real issue. Those people didn't seem like the type who would use any kind of humanity in their decisions.
It's a company…
And companies always choose the benefits over the life of a single person. Testing what a newcomer was able to do won't be much.
Let alone that that newcomer has already made three Vessels unprofitable…
I was completely driven by the desire to stay alive or to get out whenever I found myself in a Vessel. Now I have to put the fact that I'm under the microscope in mind too…
"By acting as what the manual say"
The same manual that more than half of its writers found dead there.
Trial and errors…
Am I fully prepared to do that instead of improvising to survive?
"Wait… why choosing?"
I was about to get out of the office when a new idea clicked.
Improvising with a full knowledge isn't simple improvising.
It still would cause me terribles with the company, but at least I would answer those green demon questions in a very calculated approach without thinking a billion times about how to not mention the system…
"Alright. Here we go."
I left the work with a simple and clear purpose in mind: To know as much as I could about the company's Vessels.
And for the next three days, I didn't do anything besides memorizing things I may never use in my entire life…
============
"This is delicious! Why didn't you finish your meal yet?"
I looked at my plate, then at Hero. He was trying his best to take my meal to himself, when his one wasn't even half eaten.
"Why did you order something you don't like?"
"It looked delicious."
Those green eyes were so innocent to the point that made me feel bad without making any fault.
"Okay, let me have yours."
"Yay!" He didn't even wait for me to do it, but swiped the plates himself. "I need a new juice too."
"Okay."
"You are saying 'okay' a lot lately, do you recognize it?"
No—
"I'm just tired."
I was just keeping up with things lately. And 'okay' was the simplest way to do that.
"Did you sleep well?"
"Yes."
"Then you have to go running! Or going out with your friends!"
The fact that I was taking those advices from a kid, who I was going out with on the weekend just because I don't have friends, was a lot.
We did get along just fine,
And I couldn't deny that I tend to love speaking with him—
But sometimes I just imagine that he is only in my mind. That he never existed, whether as a human or not… and I'm talking to myself.
That was one of the reasons to take him out today… to see if other people could recognize his existence.
And they did.
It was all normal, he acted as a normal child, and everyone else treated him as a child too.
"When will we go home?"
"Tomorrow morning." It was the weekend after all so I put a schedule ahead of what I would do on it. "We won't stay long, though— oh, no. We will stay as long as you need."
I remembered suddenly that the time was going differently there… even three days won't be a problem.
"Dad, dad."
"What?"
"That person." He pointed at a tall man that just passed the restaurant window. "He is very strong."
"Strong?"
"Yes."
"Just because he is tall?"
"No. The blue aura around him is quite impressive."
"...?" I looked again at the man in the distance and I saw nothing.
Hero himself was talking as if that was an everyday conversation, and that was more confusing than the conversation itself.
"What color do you see around me?"
"You told me not to tell you."
When— okay, I know the answer… I never said that.
"Hero." I took a deep breath before opening this sensitive topic. "How do you feel about my memory loss?"
Hero tilted his head to the side. A small frown appeared on his lips before he shook it.
"I sometimes forget that you don't have your memories."
"...?"
"You just act as usual."
"I act as usual?"
Did your dad used to act this awkward? Seriously?
"Yeah." With a very childish nod, he continued. "I could even tell that you are about to put the red pepper aside. People don't lose themselves when they lose their memories, they just become unaware of every reason to what they are doing."
"That was a pretty good statement. Where did you learn it from?"
"You."
"Okay, alright."
I'm losing my mind…
"About the blue aura from before." I returned my attention to the important point again. "Do you see it in everyone?"
"No. Very few people have it."
"And what does that mean?"
"Dady…"
"What?"
"We don't talk about such things outside."
"Oh—khm"
I pretended to cough. Being told by a young boy what I should talk about and what I shouldn't wasn't the best experience ever.
"We'll talk about this when we return. Oh, you finished your meal. Do you want something else?"
"Ice-cream maybe?"
"Strawberry?"
"Yes, with chocolate."
"Alright." I told the waiter our order before asking Hero again. "So, you won't tell me when was your birthday?"
"No." He seemed to be enjoying it rather than being sad. "You must know by yourself."
"How?"
"Just the way you remembered my name."
I have no idea about that either.
"Do my questions entertain you or what?"
"I'm enjoying my little time of being overly cultured. This privilege can't be mine when you regain your memories."
Aha—
"You little evil… don't eat too fast, your head will hurt—" I ended up laughing at him when he did that expression on his face. "Take your time, why the hurry?"
"I started to feel tired."
"Ah, it has been eight hours." I checked the time and surprise got me. "Time flew too fast today."
"It was lots of fun."
"Right, let's do it again next week."
"I'll wait for it!" He nodded. Happiness was clearly written all over his face. "Can I choose the places next time?"
"As if you hadn't already done that today."
"Please?"
"Okay."
"yess!!"
His enthusiastic shout caught everyone's attention in the restaurant.
And as far as I could remember, that one decision of mine led to an incident I would never have chosen for myself.