Inside WangSheng Funeral Parlor, sandalwood incense curled lazily in the air.
The afternoon should have been a good time for Hu Tao to study business promotion poems or ponder over new "discount packages," but today, the 77th Director of the WangSheng Funeral Parlor was uncharacteristically quiet.
She sat cross-legged on a grand armchair by the window, her plum blossom-shaped pupils shining brightly. She was almost buried in the brand-new book in her hands, the smile on her lips growing wider as she let out occasional, uncontrollable giggles.
"Brilliant! Simply brilliant!" Hu Tao slapped her thigh suddenly, making the pages tremble. "As expected of Mr. Lovia! This perspective, this angle—it's absolute perfection!"
What she held in her hands was the fresh-off-the-press book from Sanyu Bookstore that was already causing whispers in small circles: "secret tales of feiyun: Hidden Beauty in the Inner Chambers, the Second Miss's Sword Shadows and Book Fragrance."
As a "die-hard fan" of Mr. Lovia, Hu Tao had managed to get her hands on this new work almost immediately and couldn't wait to read it.
[As everyone knows, the wealthy Feiyun Commerce Guild of Liyue Harbor has two sons... oh no, to be precise, in the public eye, there are two young masters.]
The very first sentence piqued Hu Tao's interest immensely. She adjusted her sitting position and became even more absorbed.
[The common folk only know that Young Master Xingqiu is handsome, elegant, fond of reading, and gentle in nature... but few know what exquisite curves are hidden beneath those flowing male clothes. That clear voice, with a little modification, could turn into a female voice like a spring... what is contained is not just literary thoughts and sword intent, but also the makeup of a lady in her chambers, and the faint sorrow and cunning of having to temporarily hide her elegance.]
"Tsk tsk tsk." Hu Tao shook her head as if savoring a world-class delicacy. "'Exquisite curves,''spring-like female voice,' 'faint sorrow'—this choice of words creates such a vivid image. Mr. Lovia truly understands my heart!"
When she reached the part about the so-called "Fate Theory," she finally couldn't help but burst into loud laughter.
"Oh my Lord of Geo! Mr. Lovia! You really are... you're a genius!" Hu Tao laughed so hard she rocked back and forth, pounding the armrest of the chair. "You could actually make up a story like this?! And write it so convincingly! You even arranged the fate! Hahahaha!"
She was utterly impressed. This imagination, these details, this serious background setting—it was even more persuasive than her eloquence when promoting WangSheng Funeral Parlor's services.
Mr. Lovia, I, Hu Tao, declare you the strongest!
While laughing wildly, Hu Tao continued to read thirstily. The more she read, the more ridiculous it felt, and the more exciting it became.
When she reached the scene where "she applies makeup before the mirror and complains that binding her chest is more tiring than a day of sword practice," she burst into earth-shattering laughter again.
"Hahaha—binding the chest is more tiring than sword practice! Oh my, Young Master Xingqiu, or rather, Second Miss Xingqiu, you've really worked hard!" Hu Tao laughed until tears almost came out. She couldn't help but picture Xingqiu's usual dashing and calm appearance and compare it with the "lady in the inner chambers" in the book. The contrast was so great that it felt both absurd and supremely entertaining.
She continued reading, enjoying the descriptions of "Xingqiu's" inner struggle and identity confusion with great interest.
[She began to realize her difference from those around her... the image in the mirror was both a protective color and a layer of invisible shackles.]
[Which one is the real me? Xingqiu would occasionally be confused. Is it the gentle Second Young Master I must play? Or is it the Damselette with a hero's dream in her heart, who occasionally feels a hint of curiosity about rouge and powder?]
"Mhm, the psychological description is spot on," Hu Tao commented. "This identity struggle feels so real. If I didn't know that guy Xingqiu... cough, I almost believed it!"
And when she read the third chapter about the interactions between Xingqiu and his friends, especially with Chongyun, she was so excited she slapped the table.
[That Taoist Practitioner Chongyun, who often stays by the Second Miss's side, seems oblivious to romance, but in fact, he has long since developed feelings without realizing it. Every time he sees her, his Pure Yang Constitution, which is extremely yang and firm, becomes restlessly uncontrollable, his blood boils, and his face turns red, yet he only thinks it's the work of evil spirits...]
"Pfft—" Seeing this, Hu Tao laughed so hard she slipped right off her chair and crouched on the floor clutching her stomach.
Her laughter echoed through the empty WangSheng Funeral Parlor, startling a small Funeral Officer dozing at the door.
"Chongyun, Pure Yang Constitution! Restlessly uncontrollable! Evil spirits! Heavens! Mr. Lovia, you understand too much! This power of association—This Hall Master admits defeat!"
"Mr. Lovia, you dare to write even this. Aren't you afraid Chongyun will come after you with a popsicle? Hahaha!"
In Hu Tao's mind, the image of Chongyun's serious face turning red at the slightest provocation due to his Pure Yang Constitution instantly appeared. Combined with the book's setting of "developing feelings without realizing it," the contrast was so strong it made her stomach ache from laughing.
"I can't take it anymore, this book is too wonderful!" Hu Tao wiped away the tears from her laughter and hugged the book tightly to her chest like she had discovered a peerless treasure. "Mr. Lovia truly never disappoints me!"
She could hardly imagine what expression that simple-minded Little Daoist Priest, Chongyun, would have when he saw this description.
If that innocent Little Daoist Priest knew he was written as a "blockhead" who was attracted to the "Second Miss" without knowing it, he would probably have his Pure Yang Constitution explode on the spot and simply Vaporize.
This was much more interesting than her usual teasing of Chongyun!
While laughing, Hu Tao imagined the scene if Xingqiu and Chongyun saw this book: Xingqiu would probably wave his fan and comment with a half-smile, "The writing is acceptable, but the plot is absurd," while Chongyun... Chongyun would probably turn into a fully ripened red ice cube on the spot.
[Maintaining the status quo is the best choice. The Second Young Master of the Feiyun Commerce Guild remains the Second Young Master. The secret remains a secret, only changing from passive endurance to active choice.]
Reading to the end, where Xingqiu chooses to continue playing the "Second Young Master" because of the sudden visit of the Fatui and his own longing for "freedom," Hu Tao finally closed the book and let out a long sigh of relief.
Her face still carried a lingering smile.
"Good, so good! Mr. Lovia really made a big headline this time!" Hu Tao stood up, clutching the book like a treasure, and began pacing the room. "Fate, cross-dressing, secrets, friendship turning into 'feelings'... so many elements, the plot has its ups and downs, and the character's inner thoughts are delicately described. Although the whole thing is nonsense, it's well-reasoned and captivating nonsense! As expected of the author This Hall Master follows!"
She was already looking forward to the reaction this book would cause in Liyue Harbor. Given her understanding of Xingqiu and Chongyun, this matter would definitely not pass quietly.
Xingqiu is a girl?
She didn't believe it for a second!
That guy Xingqiu might be a bit pretty and love reading novels, but he's definitely a genuine young man!
"Hehe." Hu Tao stroked her smooth chin as a brilliant idea came to mind. "Such a wonderful story, how can I enjoy it alone? I must'share' this joy with more people!"
She wondered if she should find an opportunity—like the next time she "happened to meet" Xingqiu and Chongyun at Xiangling's Wanmin Restaurant—to "casually" mention this book, or simply "enthusiastically" give them each a hardcover copy to see their real-time reactions.
That scene would definitely be a hundred times more exciting than the plot in the book!
"It's settled!" Hu Tao clapped her hands, a bright smile appearing on her face. "Also, the latest WangSheng Funeral Parlor business... no, This Hall Master's latest act of kindness—broadening horizons! Anyone who spends at WangSheng Funeral Parlor will receive a copy of 'secret tales of feiyun'!"
Humming her self-composed WangSheng Funeral Parlor jingle, she happily began planning the next package.
After calculating for a while, Hu Tao jumped off the chair, tucked the book into her chest like a treasure, and walked out with light steps.
"Consultant Zhongli! Consultant Zhongli!" she shouted as she walked. "Come look! Something big happened in Liyue Harbor! A shocking secret!"
She planned to first share (torment) the knowledgeable consultant and see what high opinions he had on such "unofficial history."
And then... naturally, she would visit our dear "Second Miss Xingqiu" at the Feiyun Commerce Guild and "casually meet" that Little Daoist Priest Chongyun, who might be restlessly uncontrollable!
"WangSheng Funeral Parlor's latest discount: 'Rare Confidants, Shared Secrets,' Half Price for the Second Tombstone, with a free copy of 'secret tales of feiyun'!" Hu Tao hummed her self-composed tune, her face beaming with a bright smile as her figure soon disappeared through the entrance of WangSheng Funeral Parlor.
It was foreseeable that the Feiyun Commerce Guild and Chongyun would likely not have peace for a while.
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