Chapter 361: Kaguya: I Have a Girlfriend!
Not that Ryū had any complaints about the sheer size of the haul — if anything, he wished 155,000 Points had one more zero tacked onto the end. Not that that was remotely realistic, short of some actual bug in the Dimensional Chat Group's system.
Once he tapped to claim the reward, his Point balance jumped up by 155,000 on the spot. Combined with the 10,000 he'd already had on hand, that put him at 165,000 Points total.
His balance had cracked six digits again, and it left him feeling more than a little swelled up inside.
Still, he kept a tight lid on it — outwardly, at least, nothing showed. And even if someone tried to read him with Observation Haki, they wouldn't get anything useful out of it. His real feelings stayed buried deep down; whatever surfaced on his face was pure performance.
It was a trick not unlike Yukari's own approach — the way she came across as loud, scatterbrained, always making a scene.
Did anyone honestly believe someone who'd lived for thousands of years was actually that scatterbrained on the inside?
Anyone who took her surface performance at face value was a little too naive for their own good, bound to get toyed with by that youkai sage sooner or later — and thank her for it besides.
Which said something about what dating Yukari had done to Ryū. Nearly every single day was some fresh round of wits against that youkai sage, and it had genuinely made him more calculating, more guarded, in the process.
In short — he'd been assimilated by the youkai sage.
Close enough, anyway.
Since the mirror-space was so vast — a full fifth the size of the entire Naruto world — everyone had to coordinate through the Dimensional Chat Group directly rather than shouting across the battlefield.
Ryū's consciousness slipped into the chat and he tagged the Ancient One in the group thread.
RawrSoFierce: @The Ancient One, you can dissolve the mirror-space whenever you're ready. Oh, and dump the Void Beast bodies somewhere in the old-growth forests or grasslands — plenty of open land out there.
RawrSoFierce: And if you want to keep any of the corpses for research, take as many as you like.
The Ancient One: Of course, no problem. As for research — honestly, these things are so massive, even the smallest one's the size of a small hill.
The Ancient One: I really only need a little flesh, a little blood, a little hide, a little bone, some organ tissue... that's more than enough for my purposes.
Eternally Seventeen: Aaah... this one nearly killed poor little me. Not one minute of rest since the start — that was rough!
Eternally Seventeen: But the haul was well worth it! I pulled in 140,000 Points — feeling pretty good about myself right now~
Eternally Seventeen: @RawrSoFierce, did Admin-sama break six figures too?
RawrSoFierce: ...Sorry, I got 155,000.
Eternally Seventeen: Σ(っ°Д°;)っ How?! I went full throttle the entire time and still didn't out-kill you? Unacceptable!!
Eternally Seventeen: How is that even possible, I killed 211 of them!
RawrSoFierce: Because most of the ones you killed came out mangled. Half of mine were fully intact.
Eternally Seventeen: ...Damn it, I overlooked that. Even I have my off days, apparently!
Kaguya-sama: Yukari-nee sure has a lot of off days lately. Wonder why that is — maybe it's how you ended up as one of the group's two Golden Retrievers Who Lost at Love?
Street-Corner Illustrator: One of two? Who's the other one?
Edward Newgate: Gurararara, Eriri, just take a look around the chat and see whose hair's still gold. You'll figure it out.
Edward Newgate: Good thing I'm old enough that mine went from gold to white ages ago.
Street-Corner Illustrator: ...Pfft! So you're saying the group's other Golden Retriever Who Lost at Love is me?
Kaguya-sama: Congratulations, sharp as ever, Eriri. You got it in one!
Street-Corner Illustrator: Aaah, what's this "lost at love" nonsense, I am absolutely winning at life, thank you very much! Hmph!
Kaguya-sama: Winning at life usually means you've got a place of your own, a car, a boyfriend, and a dream. You've got the place, and the dream, and a car's not out of reach — but a boyfriend?
Street-Corner Illustrator: ...Doesn't seem like Kaguya-senpai has a boyfriend either, though?
Kaguya-sama: I don't have a boyfriend, no. But I do have a girlfriend!
RawrSoFierce: ???
Street-Corner Illustrator: ???
Admiral Kizaru: ???
Kaguya-sama: Ahem — a perfectly ordinary female friend, obviously. Where were your minds just now? Every single one of you, thinking such impure thoughts.
RawrSoFierce: Pfft — I'm sitting here fully invested and that's the reveal?
Eternally Seventeen: Little Kaguya's been getting bolder lately, hasn't she. Someone drag her out back and deal with her, jokes aside. [mock-innocent emoji]
"..."
Kaguya's little announcement had genuinely startled just about everyone. A girlfriend? Coming from her? Kaguya herself was female, after all!
Had she been led astray by one of the group's few members with, shall we say, particular tastes? It wasn't entirely out of the question — "orange vibes," or so it was said, could be contagious.
But what she said next made everyone want to cough up blood.
Her "girlfriend" had just meant a close female friend all along?
And here they'd all gotten themselves worked up over nothing, only to get baited like that?
Unbelievable.
Absolutely got played.
Nobody had expected even Kaguya to get this playful — clearly Yukari's influence, that youkai sage rubbing off on her.
Then again, Kaguya and Yukari had always been unusually close — practically a matched pair of good friends. Or, well. That's exactly what they were.
Kaguya-sama: Such a wholesome topic, and every single one of you jumped straight to the gutter. Truly terrifying.
Master Roshi: This old man will admit, my mind did wander for about a second there too. Ahem! Well, it's getting late — I should head back and check in on how Korin's been looking after little Piccolo.
The Ancient One: Right, once I've found somewhere to leave these Void Beast bodies, I should be heading back myself. Ended up with 105,000 Points this whole trip — not bad at all, honestly.
Crazy Diamond: "Not bad" is putting it lightly — that's downright ridiculous. The Ancient One's barely been in the group any time at all, and she's already been on one group quest that netted tens of thousands of Points, and now this — 105,000 from Void Beasts alone.
Crazy Diamond: So in under two months, she's already pulled in well over a hundred thousand Points total!
WolfKingOfQingQingGrasslands: The envy's got this king going into full osmotic crisis.
I'm Rolling In It: Uncle Tony's jealousy has hit factor-decomposition levels too.
Terrible Tornado: This must be what they call a European-luck holder.
Little Sakura of the Tohsaka: Um... isn't Tornado-nee doing pretty well herself, though?
Wandering Little Planet: Bunch of stinking overachievers, the lot of you. This lowly member is shedding tears of envy down here.
"..."
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