(Warning: This chapter contains a flashback to a past assault. Please read with care.)
"Chim, do I look okay? I... I don't want to go."
"Young Master, how many times have you asked me that? If I could count higher than ten, I would have stopped answering by now!" Chim said, panting as she worked.
"Everyone in the Third Mansion is so happy to see you going outside after a year.
Even Khun Waen is happy. You've done a good job finding the courage, Young Master." Chim's eyes were already teary as she spoke.
"And Master Kiat is a good person. He has a good heart. I'm just wondering... how did the Young Master actually agree to this?"
Chim asked with curiosity.
"Chim... you... I'm going! Don't ask so many questions," Daeng said, hurrying away. "I couldn't go yesterday because of the rain. I need to deal with this quickly."
Chim watched him go, but it wasn't just her—everyone in the Third Mansion was watching Daeng.
As she looked at him, a memory she had buried deep inside began to surface—a very painful memory.
A year before...
Daeng's seventeenth birthday had passed, just like all the years before. It had only been two weeks since then.
Chim was in the kitchen, preparing a late-night snack for him.
"Chim... you aren't asleep yet?" the head servant asked as she entered.
"No... Master Daeng is still painting, so I want to prepare something for him."
"Okay, then both of you should sleep early," the head servant said before heading to bed.
Chim looked outside. It was quiet and very cold. She went upstairs and entered the balcony slowly, so as not to disturb Daeng.
But when she arrived, no one was there. She wondered if he had gone to sleep and prepared to leave.
Suddenly, a sound came from Daeng's room. She ran to the door, but it was locked.
"Master! Young Master!" she called, but there was no sound.
" This hasn't happened before. He always answers when I call him, even if he is in bed. What's going on? Master Daeng? Master...?"
She panicked. She tried to open the door with all her strength, but it wouldn't budge.
She looked around grabbed something heavy and hit the door until it finally broke open.
Inside, Daeng was sitting on the floor on the far side of the bed. He was naked and injured, and Thanat was there—scared and refusing to let him go.
Thanat was using force, while Daeng was frozen, unable to move because of the pain.
Chim almost collapsed. She stood there like a cold stone. Then, she quickly grabbed the tool she had used on the door and struck Thanat.
She moved to protect Daeng, covering him.
"Young Master... don't fall. I am here!" she shivered, her heart breaking as she cried. "It's all my fault... it's my fault..."
Her screaming woke the entire mansion.
As she remembered that cold night, Chim refused to break down; she also recalled the words: 'Is it love?'
She looked at Daeng and Kiat as they left, feeling a strange sense of relief that Daeng was finally moving forward.
As she smiled, looking at how they walked together, she thought," They match. Master Daeng, please be happy."
***
"Wait! Can't you just keep a distance while walking?" Daeng said with an annoyed face.
"Young Master, don't be like this. We are going together, how can you say that?" Kiat said, pouting like a puppy.
But Daeng didn't give him a chance. He kept his distance, while Kiat tried hard to stay close to him.
They explored the shops and markets together.
The place was packed and crowded, filled with loud noises. Everyone was busy with their chores.
"It's good... it's only... buy it from here!" one vendor called out.
"It's a new pot... it's only... buy it from here!" called another.
Daeng was surprised by how much had changed, but at the same time, he was scared to face it all.
Looking at Daeng's sweaty face and trembling hands, Kiat slowly reached for his hand.
Daeng looked at Kiat like he wanted to go back home, but Kiat's expression assured him. He didn't say it aloud; he just let his face say, "It's okay, I am here."
They held hands as Kiat led him forward, though Daeng was still scared.
Suddenly, Daeng pulled his hand away and looked at Kiat's clueless face.
"Everyone is looking at us... just walk at a distance," Daeng whispered.
Kiat looked around at the crowd and then looked back at Daeng. "Let them," he said.
He took the hand Daeng had let go and held it even more tightly. They walked together.
" What's going on? Why can't I control my breathing? Daeng thought. I... it's alright, Daeng. Take a deep breath". He tried to calm his mind, but his heart was out of control.
Daeng made a sudden stop, like he saw something.
"Young master, what's going on?" Kiat looked at the side where Daeng was looking. Then Kiat slowly whispered, "Do you want to eat that?"
Daeng's ears turned red. "No... just looking."
Even if Daeng said that a thousand times, he really wanted to eat.
Kiat grabbed him and let them both eat at that stall. While they started to eat, Daeng was happy. Kiat was lost in Daeng's smile.
Suddenly the sky changed and filled with black clouds. The rain started.
Daeng and Kiat ran into a shelter to avoid the rain. Daeng was disappointed that he couldn't empty his bowl.
"We can come again," Kiat said. Daeng nodded.
Outside, all the vendors were trying to close their things so they wouldn't get wet.
Even the horses were getting wet.
The rain stopped, but it was already too late. A cold night fell.
Beautiful lanterns lit up the whole street.
Daeng couldn't take his eyes off them. His hands gripped Kiat's shirt, but Daeng didn't realize it. Kiat just stared at him, looking closer at Daeng.
"Why is there a crowd?" Daeng asked. He still didn't realize his hands were on the shirt.
Kiat looked out, but even with his height, he couldn't see.
"Can we go and have a look together?"
They both went there. Inside the crowd, a bride and groom bowed to each other.
On this night, red threads are linked together on the bride and groom's fingers; it is the tradition.
Daeng and Kiat could only hear, but they couldn't see.
Vittaburi has a tradition. Common people can only marry simply by using a red thread and a monk's blessing. Every marriage in Vittaburi is a big celebration because it is a beautiful tradition.
Since it was Daeng's first time, he tried to see, but he couldn't. Kiat looked at Daeng's face and slowly lifted him up.
"Kiat... what are you..."
Daeng was now supported by Kiat's shoulders. He could see the best and most beautiful view.
He forgot about Kiat and smiled because he was mesmerized by the tradition. After some time, Daeng wanted to get down.
Because he was shy, Daeng looked away.
Seeing this, Kiat slowly let him down. In that process, their chests and their breath were one.
Daeng tightened his grip on Kiat's shirt, and whispered "Let's go back, I am tired." Kiat nodded.
The whole way, Daeng tightened his grip on Kiat's shirt. He didn't even know or realize he was doing it. Even though it was silent, they could feel each other's heat the whole way."
They arrived at the third mansion.
"I... I can't come tomorrow," Kiat said with disappointment. Daeng didn't say anything. He had a hard time facing Kiat.
"Do I need to come upstairs to let you be in your room?" Kiat asked. Daeng was surprised.
Then Kiat looked at his shirt—Daeng's hand was still gripping it. "I can come if you want, and then I will go," he said to Daeng.
Daeng quickly pulled his hand away, like he never knew he was doing it the whole time.
"You... you...!" Daeng's voice cracked. He ran inside without looking, while Kiat smiled and watched him run.
"Wait... I didn't ask him about the day. Well, I have time..." Kiat said to himself.
He couldn't keep a straight face, but suddenly he stopped smiling. He thought to himself, "No way... no... no way..." He realized something, and even he was surprised.
While someone was watching them from a distance and slowly approached Kiat.