"THUNDERSTORM!"
Operating under the very scientific principle that louder equals stronger, Thor roared as he leveled Mjolnir at Tony. A pillar of lightning as thick as a water barrel erupted from the hammer, blasting straight toward him.
"Bring it on!"
Tony crossed his arms to block. With his magnetic field reinforcing him from behind, he slid back only a dozen steps—burning out part of the Helicarrier's optical camouflage panels—before stopping cold.
"YES!"
The full-body electric rush made him shout in exhilaration. J.A.R.V.I.S.'s voice in his ear sounded like a choir of angels.
"Sir, energy reserves have reached 1000% capacity."
"Then what are we waiting for? Fire!"
WHUM—
Overcharged, Tony unleashed a pulse cannon of brutal intensity.
"What—?!"
Thor had just finished his ultimate move and hadn't expected Tony to take it so easily. The blast struck him squarely and launched him backward into a parked F-35 fighter jet.
BOOM!!!
The jet exploded instantly.
Mjolnir flew from his grasp. The secondary explosion blasted Thor forward again, sending him crashing near Tony.
"Perfect opening!"
"J.A.R.V.I.S., now!"
"Brotherly Restraint!"
Tony smirked.
His Mark VI armor, forged entirely from Leon's enhanced living Adamantium, disassembled into its base components.
Under Tony's magnetic control—combined with the suit's autonomous flight systems—the parts shot toward Thor at extreme speed.
In an instant, they latched onto him like an iron maiden with attachment issues, reassembling into the battered-but-undamaged Mark VI suit—now restraining Thor completely.
"AAARGH!"
Thor roared, straining with all his might.
It didn't matter.
The combined brotherly synergy of Leon's materials and Tony's magnetic pressure was overwhelming. The armor's reverse thrusters locked him down.
He ended up in a humiliating position—knees on the deck, hands braced, unable to move—eerily reminiscent of when Ebony Maw restrained him in Avengers: Endgame.
"Well?"
"Yield?"
Tony tapped the helmet enclosing Thor's head.
"I have not lost!"
"Mjolnir!"
Though immobilized, Thor could still summon his hammer. It streaked toward him instantly.
Tony reached out to intercept—
The moment his hand grabbed the handle, an unstoppable force dragged him along with it. He slammed headfirst into Thor.
BAM!!!
"What the hell?!"
"Why is this thing so heavy?!"
Tony staggered back, rubbing the swelling forming on his forehead inside the helmet. He reset his slightly dislocated arm.
"Move, Mjolnir!"
"Don't be inconvenient at a time like this!"
Thor attempted to use the hammer to lift himself—but without being able to swing it, flight was impossible.
Then he tried summoning even stronger lightning to overload the armor—
Nothing happened.
Because he wasn't physically holding it.
Without contact, Mjolnir was effectively in "wild state."
Tony exhaled in relief.
"For a second there, I thought your hammer had gained sentience like Leon's Arcee."
He grabbed the handle again.
"Up you go!"
He used every ounce of strength he had—while simultaneously applying maximum magnetic lift to the deck beneath it.
He didn't manipulate the hammer directly; enchanted Uru metal had proven highly resistant to magnetic influence.
His effort peaked.
CRUNCH.
The deck beneath him caved in.
Mjolnir didn't budge.
"...What's up?!" Tony stared at it in disbelief.
Thor began laughing smugly.
"Give it up! Only I—"
He froze.
Because at that moment—
Steve Rogers walked over to break up the fight.
"Tony, that's enough. Keep this up and Fury's carrier is going down."
He pulled Tony out of the dented deck—
—and casually picked up Mjolnir.
"Uh… Captain Rogers?" Tony blinked. "How did you do that?"
"Do what?"
"The hammer. How are you lifting it?"
"Well…" Steve shrugged lightly, tossing it once to test the balance. "You just grip it and lift. Weight distribution's nice. Pretty comfortable, actually."
He handed it toward Tony.
"Maybe your grip was off?"
Tony took it.
CLANG.
The hammer dropped straight down—dragging his arm with it.
"DAMN IT!"
"This is NOT a me problem!"
Tony's raw strength far exceeded that of a super soldier. This had nothing to do with power.
He turned toward Thor.
"Anything you'd like to share about your hammer?"
Thor stared blankly into space.
He absolutely refused to mention the enchantment: "Whosoever holds this hammer, if he be worthy…"
His expression resembled a man whose worldview had just been betrayed.
"I lost… T T"
And thoroughly.
"Well," Tony said cheerfully, snapping his fingers.
The Mark VI disassembled and flew back into the Helicarrier's armory.
"Don't be sad, little bro. You're still young. The future's yours."
Thor nodded stiffly.
He summoned Mjolnir and walked away to process his existential crisis.
Tony and Steve exchanged looks.
Tony shrugged.
Steve rubbed his forehead.
At least this would help team hierarchy, right?
Back on the Bridge
Fury held out his hand smugly. "I win."
Steve sighed and handed over a one-dollar bill.
"You're good."
Tony walked past, casually swatting Steve's backside.
"Nice glutes, Cap. That's interest for betting with me as the stake."
"Tony!"
Banner's Lab
Natasha perched on a lab table, legs crossed.
"Can you really control the big green guy now?"
"Not control," Banner corrected. "Negotiate. We're equals."
"The problem is his anger."
"But that's also his power source," Natasha noted.
"Exactly. Leon says Earth needs an angry Hulk sometimes."
Before the atmosphere could turn too quiet—
Tony burst in.
"So, are we discussing tonight's sleepover arrangements?"
Natasha dodged his grab with a practiced pivot.
"Done flexing with your thunder buddy?"
"Our God of Thunder is currently emotionally unavailable," Fury answered.
Banner reported progress.
"They're still in U.S. territory. Further narrowing requires time."
Tony stepped up.
"They need an ultra-high-density power source to activate the Tesseract."
He rapidly worked through calculations.
"At least 100 million degrees Celsius to destabilize the energy shell."
Banner's eyes widened.
"If Selvig can stabilize quantum tunneling, any major reactor could trigger ion cascade."
Together, they locked onto the Tesseract's location within half a mile.
"Bingo!" Tony snapped.
Coordinates projected onto the screen.
"Hawaii?!" Fury's eye twitched.
"Don't tell me we're panicking while they're sipping cocktails on a beach."
Tony smirked. "If you want to see bikinis, just say so."
Fury straightened dramatically.
"I am concerned about innocent civilians!"
"Agent Hill—set course for Hawaii. Full speed!"
Meanwhile—
On a sunny Hawaiian beach—
Leon and Loki lounged on recliners beneath the sun, calmly observing the ocean, the waves…
…and the generous view of bikini-clad beachgoers.
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